Page 12 | HH income of £250k but we don’t feel rich?

Bdrgvlugcbu · 2026-01-18T19:55:40+00:00

Not a brag in the slightest! And wouldn’t discuss this non-anonymously. DH earns just over £250k per year. Has fallen into the role really and is based on natural ability/talent as oppose to lots of hard work and training. He works very long hours though. I’m a SAHM to 3 young children. Take home is approx £12k per month. School fees: £3,000 per month Mortgage, car and bills: £3500 per month Personal savings £2000 per month Kids savings: £450 per month DH and I take: £500 personal money each per month Leaves us with £2,000 per month for general spending, food shopping, days out, holidays, children’s clothes… We don’t really go without, but we don’t feel “well off” by any means. Where are we going wrong?!

bombastix · 18/01/2026 20:25

Piss take

Original poster

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:25

DecemberGloom · 18/01/2026 20:23

Are you unused to having this type of income?

You need to pay for some sound financial advice OP. It seems like you aren’t feeling secure and I’d been concerned that you are at risk if your DH loses his job and you mentioned you don’t have much pension wealth.

Your surplus could probably be saved more effectively, which might a) make you feel more secure as you’d have an investment plan and b) see how comparatively wealthy you are.

We both grew up incredibly poor.

OP posts:

Lonelycrab · 18/01/2026 20:24

bombastix · 18/01/2026 20:24

Nah. What 250k job doesn’t have a good pension.

Come on Mumsnet, this is a piss take

^^
no shit Sherlock

IdleThoughts · 18/01/2026 20:24

Try batch cooking or take in some ironing, maybe cancel the cleaner? Stay strong my friend, you will get through this.

bombastix · 18/01/2026 20:24

Nah. What 250k job doesn’t have a good pension.

Come on Mumsnet, this is a piss take

Original poster

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:23

User0549533 · 18/01/2026 20:22

The biggest red flag that makes me suspect this thread is just rage-bait is that OP never mentions domestic help or a nanny as part of her budget. OP has no idea how people who really earn £12k actually live.

100% of families in that bracket have significant expenditure for household staff, including a fully pay-rolled housekeeper, nanny or cleaner.

There is no way we could afford a proper nanny. I look after the children. We do have somebody who does our cleaning and ironing though (comes in under the bills section).

We live in a 4 bed semi. We don’t need a housekeeper.

OP posts:

YouWillNeverGuessMyUsername · 18/01/2026 20:23

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:19

The children’s clothes are from supermarkets, next, M&S. Our clothes are high street. We shop at Aldi. We live in a very normal but nice area. You just imagine that this kind of salary gets you more than this but it doesn’t. I have no idea what you would have to be earning to live in a multi million pound house and drive around in £100k+ cars as we live a life nothing like this.

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"You just imagine that this kind of salary gets you more than this but it doesn’t."

What more than expensive houses, cars, kids in independent schools, huge savings and loads of spending money each week.... What more do you want?

DecemberGloom · 18/01/2026 20:23

Are you unused to having this type of income?

You need to pay for some sound financial advice OP. It seems like you aren’t feeling secure and I’d been concerned that you are at risk if your DH loses his job and you mentioned you don’t have much pension wealth.

Your surplus could probably be saved more effectively, which might a) make you feel more secure as you’d have an investment plan and b) see how comparatively wealthy you are.

Yuja · 18/01/2026 20:23

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:19

The children’s clothes are from supermarkets, next, M&S. Our clothes are high street. We shop at Aldi. We live in a very normal but nice area. You just imagine that this kind of salary gets you more than this but it doesn’t. I have no idea what you would have to be earning to live in a multi million pound house and drive around in £100k+ cars as we live a life nothing like this.

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Send your kids to state school? I mean that’s a massive chunk of money right there- you’d feel an awful lot richer if you did this. I mean, I’m sure you actually know this tbh

MrsBungle · 18/01/2026 20:22

Get a job then? What are you both spending your £500 each on? All your bills are paid, you have significant savings, £2k left over and £500 each. All on one wage!

Original poster

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:22

YouWillNeverGuessMyUsername · 18/01/2026 20:21

But you have £2500+ leftover each month, even after somehow spending £500 a month in "personal" spending etc.

How can you not comprehend that your left over money is a lot ??

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It is, but that money needs to be saved if we don’t want to retire on a state pension.

OP posts:

User0549533 · 18/01/2026 20:22

The biggest red flag that makes me suspect this thread is just rage-bait is that OP never mentions domestic help or a nanny as part of her budget. OP has no idea how people who really earn £12k actually live.

100% of families in that bracket have significant expenditure for household staff, including a fully pay-rolled housekeeper, nanny or cleaner.

YouWillNeverGuessMyUsername · 18/01/2026 20:22

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:19

The children’s clothes are from supermarkets, next, M&S. Our clothes are high street. We shop at Aldi. We live in a very normal but nice area. You just imagine that this kind of salary gets you more than this but it doesn’t. I have no idea what you would have to be earning to live in a multi million pound house and drive around in £100k+ cars as we live a life nothing like this.

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But you're spending an absolute fortune in school fees and cars...

shhblackbag · 18/01/2026 20:22

YouWillNeverGuessMyUsername · 18/01/2026 20:21

Or common sense either apparently...

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Yeah, that too.

YouWillNeverGuessMyUsername · 18/01/2026 20:21

shhblackbag · 18/01/2026 20:19

This is a case in point that while money can buy you freedom and choice, it does not mean you'll be happy.

Or common sense either apparently...

Christmaseree · 18/01/2026 20:21

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:19

The children’s clothes are from supermarkets, next, M&S. Our clothes are high street. We shop at Aldi. We live in a very normal but nice area. You just imagine that this kind of salary gets you more than this but it doesn’t. I have no idea what you would have to be earning to live in a multi million pound house and drive around in £100k+ cars as we live a life nothing like this.

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You would be if you put your DC in state schools, it’s not complicated is it?

bombastix · 18/01/2026 20:21

250k and shopping at Aldi! Bloody hell

YouWillNeverGuessMyUsername · 18/01/2026 20:21

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:19

The children’s clothes are from supermarkets, next, M&S. Our clothes are high street. We shop at Aldi. We live in a very normal but nice area. You just imagine that this kind of salary gets you more than this but it doesn’t. I have no idea what you would have to be earning to live in a multi million pound house and drive around in £100k+ cars as we live a life nothing like this.

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But you have £2500+ leftover each month, even after somehow spending £500 a month in "personal" spending etc.

How can you not comprehend that your left over money is a lot ??

jamandcustard · 18/01/2026 20:20

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:19

The children’s clothes are from supermarkets, next, M&S. Our clothes are high street. We shop at Aldi. We live in a very normal but nice area. You just imagine that this kind of salary gets you more than this but it doesn’t. I have no idea what you would have to be earning to live in a multi million pound house and drive around in £100k+ cars as we live a life nothing like this.

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You put more in savings every month then many families have to survive on 🙄

shhblackbag · 18/01/2026 20:19

This is a case in point that while money can buy you freedom and choice, it does not mean you'll be happy.

YouWillNeverGuessMyUsername · 18/01/2026 20:19

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:13

We don’t have years worth of savings so maybe this is why. If DH lost his job tomorrow then we’d be in trouble.

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You'd be fine because you could stop the £2500 savings spend, the £1000"personal" spending etc

I have no idea what you're spending £125 a week on that isn't even days out etc...

Original poster

Bdrgvlugcbu · 18/01/2026 20:19

itsthetea · 18/01/2026 20:15

Objectively you are rolling in it

so why don’t you feel rich? You don’t feel well
off?

is it a sign of deeper dissatisfaction with your life? You have all this money and you do what you think your should be doing and just don’t feel anything that gives you joy for all that ?

The children’s clothes are from supermarkets, next, M&S. Our clothes are high street. We shop at Aldi. We live in a very normal but nice area. You just imagine that this kind of salary gets you more than this but it doesn’t. I have no idea what you would have to be earning to live in a multi million pound house and drive around in £100k+ cars as we live a life nothing like this.

OP posts:

Whataninterestinglookingpotato · 18/01/2026 20:19

Wow OP, I’d love to be as poor as you 😂😂😂.

1), you pay for private school. That’s a massive luxury that 93% of children don’t have.
2), you save £2000 a month. Lucky you.
3) with a mortgage as high as that you clearly live in a massive house.

I feel I might need to get my tiny violin out for you! 🎻.

send your kids to state school and downsize and you’ll soon feel minted OP.

itsthetea · 18/01/2026 20:18

Getting yourself a job isn’t such as bad idea - might help you feel more fulfilled

LivingDeadGirlUK · 18/01/2026 20:17

It sounds like you just aren't happy OP, no amount of money is going to change that. Try and figure out what the real problem is.