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AIBU?

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Original poster

Grown arsed

34 replies

HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 20:57

I don't think this particular phrase works. The American English version is fine, kind of sassy. But the UK version is clunky and unsavoury.

Please can we stop using it? Thank you.

OP posts:
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Ladygodalmighty · 19/01/2026 22:44

Can't be arsed! Rolls of the tongue and makes the point succinctly. Can't be assed - meh!

Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 23:18

But, the d is there.

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FrangipaniBlue · 17/01/2026 23:16

I kind of agree….. but I think it’s the D on the end that makes it worse!

grown ass - yes
grown arse - hmm I don’t like it but I can live with it
grown arsed - no.

Zov · 17/01/2026 22:44

Clychaugog · 17/01/2026 21:31

In my head, an American ass is a bit like the ass on the Bruce Springsteen album cover. A British arse, in my imagination, is usually large, hairy and lumpy and hanging out rhe top of ill fitting jeans

Speak for yourself! Mine is nothing like this description! 😆

(‿ˠ‿)

Zov · 17/01/2026 22:37

100% agree @HauntedBungalow

People on here will say YABU, and vote as such, because people don't like being told what to do. But I agree. It sounds ridiculous, and I picture a 16 year old girl who is trying to sound clever or cool who is posting this drivel. It sounds so juvenile. 😆

If is IS someone who is actually an ADULT saying it, I imagine they are the same ones who say 'use your words,' 😖 and also 'kindly' at the beginning of a post where they are being anything but kind!' They also say BE KIND a lot on threads where women are refusing to step in line for someone who is treating them like a skivvy or where a lone man is trying to get their attention/speak to them... 🙄

IngridBurger · 17/01/2026 22:30

YANBU OP. In many situations arse is the clear winner but not in this case.

TheSunRisesInTheEast · 17/01/2026 22:27

You can get arsey with someone, but not assy.

Assy is behaving like a donkey, and that isn't a thing 🙄

Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:33

Americans are hairless and lumpless it's true.

OP posts:
Clychaugog · 17/01/2026 21:31

In my head, an American ass is a bit like the ass on the Bruce Springsteen album cover. A British arse, in my imagination, is usually large, hairy and lumpy and hanging out rhe top of ill fitting jeans

Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:30

I deliberately avoided "can't be arsed/assed" because then we'd be getting into can be/can't be minutiae and it's only one thread.

Lord forbid if we strayed to "can't be fucked".

OP posts:
TheSunRisesInTheEast · 17/01/2026 21:28

Half arsed - yes
Half assed - no
Can't be arsed - yes
Can't be assed - no
😂

Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:26

Mama2many73 · 17/01/2026 21:20

I didn't click either until you posted the American version. Ive obviously heard that loads but have never heard the British grown arsed , it sounds ridiculous!

Yes, it really does!

But, people are doing it. They must be stopped.

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Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:24

To be clear, arse/arsed does work in multiple scenarios and morphs well from the original ass.

Eg asshole = arsehole. Very good, no problems there.

Shove it up your ass/arse. Great. Almost interchangeable, seamless really.

But grown ass. No. That's an American thing; it's for them alone. Once you put an arse in, it doesn't work the same.

OP posts:
Mama2many73 · 17/01/2026 21:20

I didn't click either until you posted the American version. Ive obviously heard that loads but have never heard the British grown arsed , it sounds ridiculous!

INX · 17/01/2026 21:20

HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:19

Exactly.

Assed. Not arsed.

Show quote history

I don't think any of us are arsed really.

Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:19

BettysRoasties · 17/01/2026 21:17

I love to use grown assed man.

He / she can make Their own choices they are a grown assed man/women.

it fits.

Edited

Exactly.

Assed. Not arsed.

OP posts:
Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:18

And just how, exactly, does grown arse work as a noun?

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TheDandyLion · 17/01/2026 21:17

Grown Arse works as a noun but it doesn't become an adjective nor past tense so grown arsed doesn't work.

BettysRoasties · 17/01/2026 21:17

I love to use grown assed man.

He / she can make Their own choices they are a grown assed man/women.

it fits.

Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:13

Because you will ruin it with arse?

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sanityisamyth · 17/01/2026 21:13

Never heard of it. But I avoid anything American for precisely this reason.

Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:11

Oh how I wish that nobody in England had heard it. But, sadly, they have. And they have ruined it with arse.

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TenderChicken · 17/01/2026 21:10

So I'm American and I do regularly say, "I'm a grown-ass woman". I say it to my kids a lot when they ask why I'm allowed to do things they aren't, lol.

I've never heard an English person say it, and judging from the bemused reaction I get when I say it, they haven't heard the American version before either!

QuirkyHorse · 17/01/2026 21:10

HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:04

"Grown ass".

Like I say, sassy, finger clicky, swishy hair. Clueless throwback vibes.

But the UK version ... no. Arse can never be those things.

Show quote history

Oh! I must be stupid not realising it was that 🤦🏻‍♀️

Yeah, not an expression I would use however it was pronounced.

Original poster
HauntedBungalow · 17/01/2026 21:04

QuirkyHorse · 17/01/2026 21:00

What is the American English version?
I've never heard the expression.

"Grown ass".

Like I say, sassy, finger clicky, swishy hair. Clueless throwback vibes.

But the UK version ... no. Arse can never be those things.

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