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AIBU?

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Do you ever hand write letters or know anyone who does?

65 replies

Andsthatscat · 17/01/2026 05:29

Early last year I entered into a new relationship, I met him through a friend and as we are both a bit older (though I wouldn’t say old) we are taking it slow. He is 63, he has one daughter who is 25.
He is not technology averse or bad with technology by any means, he books flights and holidays, tables for restaurants, online banking, will order items online if he can’t source them in person. However he does not text, really at all. He might send a text to a friend if they have plans and he wants to confirm them or if he needs to communicate with a tradesmen doing work or similar, but he seldom texts me or his family. He is happy to call and does if necessary but most of our talking is saved for when we meet up.
In addition to this he still handwrites letters, mostly to his daughter who he writes to once a month but also his brother who doesn’t live locally.
His parents who are in their late 80s also still handwrite letters to his daughter and she replies also with handwritten letters. She lives abroad but does seem to send her replies monthly too.

I feel this is slightly peculiar, he’d be perfectly capable of texting or even emailing if he wanted a longer format but still he and much of his family still seem to enjoy writing letters. He said his reason is that he feels more thought and emotion goes into a letter when you have to take the time to write it by hand and post it.

I don’t think there is anything wrong with this and actually think it’s endearing but I do think it is a tad peculiar and certainly not common.

So AIBU to wonder if anyone here still handwrites letters or knows anyone who does? If you do, why?

OP posts:
Runnersandtoms · 17/01/2026 09:27

I write a letter inside a Christmas card to my great aunt and a couple of other people. Otherwise no. It is a shame though, I have kept piles of letters from when I was living abroad in the late 90s and from my first year of uni when now DH and I were engaged but living 3 hrs apart. Letters from my now deceased grandparents are the most precious.

luckylavender · 17/01/2026 09:17

Also I use a fountain pen every day at work. I have written notebooks.

luckylavender · 17/01/2026 09:17

I know people who still write letters and I do too sometimes. It’s so much more personal to read someone’s handwriting.

venus7 · 17/01/2026 09:15

Yes, I do; and with a beautiful fountain pen.
Much less than I used to, partly because it generally takes two to correspond, but hope I always will.
Use email for most things, and landline.
Detest texting; used only for briefest arrangements.
Your boyfriend is not peculier.

Meadowfinch · 17/01/2026 08:59

I have a friend who is a farmer. She deals with endless govt & farm admin emaIls. Occasionally we write to each other, take time choosing note paper, or a beautiful card, describe the good or funny things that have happened in our lives. A little bit of civilisation in a mundane day can be very cheering. We've been doing it for years. Nothing wrong with that.

We also text, message, ring each other.

TheDandyLion · 17/01/2026 08:44

I still write letters to a few people. I love shopping for cards, postcards and writing paper sets. I haven't seen my best friend since primary school for 25 years after she emigrated but we still send each other letters and postcards.

Placetobreathe · 17/01/2026 08:17

I received a handwritten letter from my sister last year. It really took me back to the past when I Ieft home many years ago.Writing letters and landline phonecalls were the only ways to communicate with my family then.

I quite enjoy reading collections of letters and I suppose that will be a dying, if not dead, genre of literature in the future.

SouthwarkLass · 17/01/2026 07:18

Sounds exactly like DH (age 61). He still writes to a few old friends and always sends beautiful thank you cards for Christmas, birthdays, events. Its lovely.
I used to love waiting for the post and letters from friends. I still have one friend who sends the most wonderful monthly missive. It's a dying art which is sad.

ThePerfectWeekend · 17/01/2026 07:01

DD is at university. We call and message regularly, but I send her a letter (usually a card that's blank inside) around twice a month and she writes back.
I remembered how much I loved receiving 'proper' letters when I was a student and worked abroad in the 80s. I began with DD as soon as she started university.
DD now writes to my DSis and SIL, several friends and even my best friend. She has a collage of them on her wall in her accommodation and says it's a habit she intends to keep and that they always cheers her up.
I was quite surprised stamps are now £1.50 now and am always on the lookout for interesting cards. I think it's worth every penny. I last posted one yesterday.
DD is now studying a Masters in a science subject. She says writing gives her the chance stop, relax and keep the skill. She'd rarely pick up a pen otherwise.

CharlotteSometimeslikesanafternoonnap · 17/01/2026 06:32

I write letters. I text if needed but nothing makes my heart sink faster than sending a text and then seeing "Typing..." immediately pop up. If I write a letter it is long and chatty, whereas a text is the minimum of information. My friends seem to like receiving them and a couple write back. I'm in my 50s if relevant.

Philandbill · 17/01/2026 06:01

Young adult DC handwrite thank you letters for birthday and Christmas gifts. It was drilled into them as a non-negotiable when they were children though so it's probably a hangover from that 😁

BatshitCrazyWoman · 17/01/2026 06:00

There are a couple of people I write to - I like it! I have a full range of modern media at my disposal, so use email, text and WhatsApp, but those two people, who I see very rarely now, I write to. Not often, every couple of months.

NotMeAtAll · 17/01/2026 05:54

I loved writing to people but haven't done so in years. I remember sending aerogrammes to people who lived far away. It seemed so sophisticated.

My mother used to write to several family members a few times a week. That would be expensive nowadays.

Billybagpuss · 17/01/2026 05:46

I still have a pen friend, we’ve never met,
since we’ve been writing she’s got married, had 2 kids, we stopped exchanging for a while but started back up again about 6 months ago. We are fb friends too so I’d put any photos there now we don’t get the physical packs of pics from boots to send.

it’s nice sending letters. I also sent one this week to an old neighbour who moved away who included a few bits of news in a Christmas card and as I don’t have a phone number for her and don’t send cards anymore I wrote.

it’s also lovely receiving something that’s not junk or an nhs summons.

CountryVic · 17/01/2026 05:42

I write to my aunt who is 92, and I send postcards when I travel, she does not live near me and enjoys my contacts. She does have an iPhone and iPad so I could text and email her, but I prefer the letter, just seems a bit nicer.