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Original poster

ICE and your young adult child

143 replies

user3867599 · 16/01/2026 14:31

DC is a dual citizen (US and UK), just finished university and is living and working in a city in the US where ICE is about to be deployed.

What would you say to them?

OP posts:
LlttledrummergirI · 17/01/2026 13:46

Poetnojo · 17/01/2026 12:29

Since Jan 2025 there have been 16 shootings by ICE, 4 fatal.
In the same time frame there has been 341 attacks against ICE including 66 using vehicles. I'm surprised they are not more quick to shoot given those stats.

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Link please.
How many of those 66 agents in front of cars deliberately put themselves there to cause the issues?

Op you have obviously brought your dc up well. Tell them to trust their judgement, do what they feel is right and stay safe.

HarrietPierce · 17/01/2026 13:33

LumiK
"It didn’t though really, did it? That wasn’t the only action from the suffragettes. It’s not like they went out and waved placards and BAM got the vote."

Yes they did other things as well but placard waving, and marching were also instrumental in helping women gain the vote, as it helped to raise public awareness, and kept the issue of women's suffrage on the political agenda.

ByCyanMoose · 17/01/2026 13:27

There is a reason practically every interaction with ICE is filmed, and it’s not just generating clicks on social media. The blue state governors have asked people to film ICE agents violating the law, so that they can be arrested when the Democrats regain power.

Original poster
user3867599 · 17/01/2026 13:26

EasternStandard · 17/01/2026 13:22

It’s really their decision, not what you want them to do.

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Completely. But we do talk, as a family, about decisions. I can't tell DC what to do, but I can tell them how I feel.

OP posts:
ByCyanMoose · 17/01/2026 13:24

Poetnojo · 17/01/2026 11:16

You thought him about morality, so I would assume part of that would be that dangerous criminals should be dealt with properly and not allowed to walk the streets putting innocent people in danger? Then just let ICE get on with their jobs in taking dangerous criminals off the streets surely 🤔
I would also hope you instilled in him to be a law abiding citizen and not become a felon so he should be all good.

Edited
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Except that in the course of enforcing the law, Ice agents have been committing crimes far more serious than the one they are ostensibly trying to combat. Being an illegal immigrant is a misdemeanor or even a civil infraction in the US. Excessive force, battery, and false imprisonment are felonies, as are entering a private space without a signed judicial warrant, and deprivation of rights under color of authority. And, of course, murder. Most of these have occurred regularly over the past year, and the last has happened more than once.

In a democracy, you cannot send lawless thugs to enforce the law and expect people to obey you. This is how you bring a staid midwestern state to the brink of rebellion.

EasternStandard · 17/01/2026 13:22

user3867599 · 17/01/2026 13:21

But that's my point. I want my DC to stay safe, but at the same time I don't want my DC to look at a 17 year old being dragged on his face or an autistic woman being manhandled out of their car for no reason and shrug and say, not my business.

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It’s really their decision, not what you want them to do.

Original poster
user3867599 · 17/01/2026 13:21

LumiK · 17/01/2026 12:56

It's none of my business. But then I'm not the type to go to protests because I don't think waving placards does any good in the real world. Perhaps if you are and you've brought your kid up to do so, that explains the concern.

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But that's my point. I want my DC to stay safe, but at the same time I don't want my DC to look at a 17 year old being dragged on his face or an autistic woman being manhandled out of their car for no reason and shrug and say, not my business.

OP posts:
Original poster
user3867599 · 17/01/2026 13:18

Itsmetheflamingo · 17/01/2026 13:12

It didn’t though really, did it? That wasn’t the only action from the suffragettes. It’s not like they went out and waved placards and BAM got the vote.

Show quote history

These protests have been more than waving placards, surely? They're partly about providing safe escort, making sure actions are documented. Do we not think that's important?

OP posts:
Original poster
user3867599 · 17/01/2026 13:17

Poetnojo · 17/01/2026 12:29

Since Jan 2025 there have been 16 shootings by ICE, 4 fatal.
In the same time frame there has been 341 attacks against ICE including 66 using vehicles. I'm surprised they are not more quick to shoot given those stats.

Show quote history

Considering that those statistics are coming from DHS, the leaders of which, have stood at podiums and lied in broad daylight, you'll excuse me if I take them with a grain of salt.

@LumiK I actually am not a big protestor, but when you're a citizen of a country in which you feel the government is adopting unacceptable policies, and in which you do still nominally have the right to protest, how else do you take a stance? How do you feel about the protestors in Iran?

OP posts:
ByCyanMoose · 17/01/2026 13:14

EmeraldRoulette · 17/01/2026 00:24

@ByCyanMoose do you accept that paid protestors exist at all? I agree it doesn't take much to knock up a sign. But that's not the point.

Practically everything exists to some extent. But if they exist they are in small enough numbers to be a nonfactor. I’ve never encountered them and don’t know anyone who has. And I’ve been going to protests for a long time.

Itsmetheflamingo · 17/01/2026 13:12

HarrietPierce · 17/01/2026 13:08

LumiK
"I don't think waving placards does any good in the real world."

Well it did for the Suffragettes.

It didn’t though really, did it? That wasn’t the only action from the suffragettes. It’s not like they went out and waved placards and BAM got the vote.

wordywitch · 17/01/2026 13:11

I’d tell them to get a good bullhorn and work on their sign making skills. Fuck ICE.

HarrietPierce · 17/01/2026 13:08

LumiK
"I don't think waving placards does any good in the real world."

Well it did for the Suffragettes.

LumiK · 17/01/2026 12:56

user3867599 · 17/01/2026 12:11

In theory that's right. And I'm not personally worried that ICE is there for DC.

But they are at the moment doing things like putting 17 year old US citizens in chokeholds and randomly grabbing autistic women out of cars. That's my point. What do you do if or when you see that? Do you try to assist in protecting them? Do you protest that?

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It's none of my business. But then I'm not the type to go to protests because I don't think waving placards does any good in the real world. Perhaps if you are and you've brought your kid up to do so, that explains the concern.

HarrietPierce · 17/01/2026 12:46

LumiK ·

"ICE isn't there for them. They're there for people who shouldn't be"

Oh- like the indigenous people they are targeting then .

saraclara · 17/01/2026 12:34

I'd tell him not too have any interaction with ICE officers. Be there to show solidarity with the community, blow whistles etc. But don't mouth off at anyone.

Poetnojo · 17/01/2026 12:29

user3867599 · 17/01/2026 11:38

No, no I haven't. I've seen a lot of the opposite, in fact.

However, that's not what this thread is about. So you're welcome to use your talking points on yourself or others, but I'm not interested in engaging further. Thanks!

Show quote history

Since Jan 2025 there have been 16 shootings by ICE, 4 fatal.
In the same time frame there has been 341 attacks against ICE including 66 using vehicles. I'm surprised they are not more quick to shoot given those stats.

Original poster
user3867599 · 17/01/2026 12:11

LumiK · 17/01/2026 12:04

Nothing? I assume they go about their daily life and obey the law and, being a US citizen, are there legally.

ICE isn't there for them. They're there for people who shouldn't be.

In theory that's right. And I'm not personally worried that ICE is there for DC.

But they are at the moment doing things like putting 17 year old US citizens in chokeholds and randomly grabbing autistic women out of cars. That's my point. What do you do if or when you see that? Do you try to assist in protecting them? Do you protest that?

OP posts:
NewsOfMidLevelPortent · 17/01/2026 12:09

Just stay away from the protests. It's really not that difficult.

LumiK · 17/01/2026 12:04

Nothing? I assume they go about their daily life and obey the law and, being a US citizen, are there legally.

ICE isn't there for them. They're there for people who shouldn't be.

StandFirm · 17/01/2026 11:54

user3867599 · 16/01/2026 17:30

Thank you for this. I was rushing in my initial post so might missed out some details.

DC is just out of law school and works as in-house counsel in a creative industry, but has done a lot of volunteering/legal clinics with some of the communities that are being targeted. I know they are quite tied into groups planning some specific helping strategies, similar to those you mentioned.

Skin colour white, very Anglo Saxon looking, and while I realise that makes them less of a target, I'm not counting on that being a free pass.

DC grew up partly in the US and partly in the UK, so knows the difference between policing cultures and is generally very sensible and level-headed. I've been pleased by how peaceful most of the protesting has been, but I do feel like the country is teetering on the edge of a powder keg at the moment and obviously would prefer they weren't caught up in it.

A whistle is a good idea. Thank you

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DC has done a lot of volunteering/legal clinics with some of the communities that are being targeted

I think this is the single most important and productive thing he can be doing. That makes a huge difference.

Sadcafe · 17/01/2026 11:45

Avoid any confrontation

WonderingWanda · 17/01/2026 11:43

TakeALookAtTheseSwatches · 16/01/2026 14:45

Tell him to get out of America. No job or uni is worth that.

This!

Notmycircusnotmyotter · 17/01/2026 11:41

Be careful on social media and don't do anything stupid like protesting

Original poster
user3867599 · 17/01/2026 11:41

lljkk · 17/01/2026 11:38

My kids have US citizenship.
I would say ... "carry your passport at all times and if you see an ICE person with access to a gun, presume they are planning to shoot someone"

But that's the problem. They all have guns all the time.

So if they're cutting an autistic woman out of her seatbelt while she's screaming she's just trying to get to her doctor's appointment and that she's autistic and it takes her a while to understand orders, do you just turn around and go home?

Of course I want DC to be safe, but I have a hard time saying, ignore that.

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