Am I being an overbearing parent or is this normal for 8 weeks in secondary school ?

this sounds terrible, especially for an independent school, this is awful bullying and also suggests the atmosphere is awful.we had our fair share of problems with DD1 in year 7, but for the first term they were generally all lovely and then it went downhill. It was awful enough for me to remove her from the school, and even then yours sounds far worse. This is not normal.

I did thanks.

If this is normal then my DD won’t be there 8 weeks when she starts in September! She won’t even be there 8 days, I’d rather homeschool her.

The school's response is appalling.

Go to the police every single time. They'll soon wish they'd dealt with it better in house.

A 12 year old should not have to deal with this on her own. She is being bullied OP. If this is considered normal then I don't want my kids to go to secondary in this country.

Sorry not helpful but i am pretty shocked. The other kids sound vile. Is it just a few kids or has the entire class ganged up against her? If it's the entire class I would try everything to move her.

If she is funded by the LA (I am assuming via an EHCP or is a Care Experienced Child). Contact your LA who manages the EHCP or Virtual School. Request a safeguarding and discrimination professionals meeting.

I am wondering if the bullying could be attributed to the disability. Disability is a protected characteristic (a potential discrimination charge should light fire up their bottoms regarding un-professional behaviour from the school). I cannot believe that ELSA or a therapist would be suggesting that a child or an adult have an interaction with an individual that was making them distressed.

Glad you are feeling less anxious OP, it can be hard when professionals are acting like this is no big deal.

Definitely go to the governors next. And the police. Don’t let it drop and tolerate it.

I know there is a range as I work in that area of education but unfortunately it is very common issue that you are having.

You could do a data access request for all of the information that the school holds on you and your DD - that will be very revealing about what steps they are or are not taking. It will also tie them in knots as they have to spend lots of time dealing with it.

Then that's definitely something for the board of governors to investigate. If you're able (and willing) to cite the policy section(s) they fail to meet alongside the issues you've experienced it gives the teachers minimising the issues less wiggle room.

This is awful

I work at, and send my own children to, an independant school.

This simply would not be accepted: The students are expected to follow the school values, at all times, and not only while at school. Anything that happens over whatsapp etc is dealt with as if it had happened face to face in school, with the lesson that you need behave appropriately ALL the time, not only in school.

You DD does not deserve to be bullied and school should be much more supportive

I’m shocked that an independent school hasn’t dealt with this better! My daughter is at an independent secondary and is in Year 9 and I cannot believe how great they are at crushing bullying. This is horrendous for your daughter to experience and I would consider moving her.

They all say that but it means they don't take children with a very high level of emotional and behavioral difficulties. They don't want to be mistaken for a school that specialises in these issues. However, they do tend to have a higher number than mainstream schools because children often have a complex mix of SEND.

I'd go back to the school and tell them you'll be logging the threats with the police (I'm guessing you have screen shots), and make sure to do so.
I'd also be looking to move school.

In the interim see what the school policy is on bullying/harassment and see how they have (or have not) acted in line with this. Ditto their safeguarding policy.
Write a letter to the board of governors raising the issue too. They are required to investigate.

This is not ok. Also online bullying is illegal.

Secondary schools are an absolute cesspit, they're dangerous and damaging places. Your poor daughter.

This sounds absolutely dreadful and not at all ‘normal’ for year 7

It sounds like nasty ongoing bullying…is this a girls only school by any chance…?
I attended one and definitely know what they can be like unfortunately

My DS1 also started year 7 last September- had experienced nothing like what you’ve described, in fact the opposite but we may have got lucky with his friends and school (local state secondary)

Seriously consider other options locally, she’s had an awful start and sounds like needs a fresh start somewhere else, sadly, sorry to hear of her experiences so far

Your daughter is being bullied and whenever you address it with the school, do by email and call it 'bullying'.
I'd also start to keep a log of every incident, the date, description and how your daughter felt. Keep screenshots and links of everything.

Then I'd do a few things; contact the police to report it and discuss what can be done, contact school and tell them that you'll be contact the school governors and the final thing (which will probably be frowned upon is) is I'd approach the parents of the child.

It's bullying and given the schools response I'd have no hope of it getting better. Change schools.

this is a fee paying school, the place is funded by the LA!

A lot of dyslexia specialist schools take children that have other issues as well as dyslexia (even the ones who say they don't). This other girl clearly has behavioral problems and social communication issues. You are unlikely to find a special school that doesn't have some children with behavioral issues in it. That is often part of the reason they haven't coped in mainstream. Standard sanctions don't always work for these children. It doesn't sound like it is a good environment for your child though.

Fuck me. That sounds like a rough state school. Is she bright? Could you get her into a grammar/a better school? Some kids are thugs, lots of secondary schools are crowd control not education, what can you do. This book is recommended for anyone experiencing bullying: amzn.eu/d/dKeo2Nj