AIBU to be upset partner changed his gmail password?

kindly OP, stop mothering him

I woiuld NEVER dream of looking at hubby email
I would be fd off if he looked at mine
Would you open someone else post

Folks are really missing rhe point here. So what’s happened is you logged onto indeed, he got a notification saying you’d logged onto his gmail account, he got angry for the invasion of privacy as he wasn’t aware you’d not accessed but were using indeed, he should have simply said did you access my emails and why,

Let him do his own applications from now on.
What a bast**d. Doing him a favour and he treats you like that.
Wonder what he's got to hide.

op, deep breath. You’ve been setting yourself on fire to keep him warm and he’s spat on you for it. You have kids who it sounds like only have one active parent, you, which makes you absolutely essential. You need to look after yourself. The good news is that was the last crappy job application you ever send for him, and you tell him that today. Sit down and have a think about what separation looks like because he doesn’t sound worth it.

That’s a very extreme reaction from your DH, particularly as it happened in the course of you helping him do something for him that he somehow turned into your responsibility.

To be fair to your DH (not that he is showing you the same courtesy), in retelling the story, lots of people jumped to the same conclusion and assumed you had accessed his emails. Maybe it just surprised him, or maybe he has something to hide in there - who knows. But to behave like that when you were trying to help must have been really upsetting for you. Does he usually behave like a stroppy teenager?!

On the bright side, you can no longer help him, and he’ll have to do his own applications now, so he’s inadvertently saved you a bit of time at least

Helping someone with applications and doing it for them are two different things, take a massive step back.

Oh what a pampered little arse he’s being
definitely NU

after his reaction I would tell him he’s on his own that I would be happy to look over anything if he wanted me to

in fact it’s a fucking relief really darling I can’t do the job applications for you asked for by you without access

although there is nothing more suspicious than his reaction - I would now want to know what he’s hiding

I never understand on here why people can't have access to their DH's phone/email/post and see it as some kind of violation. Neither of us think twice about it in out house, in fact we share the same email address as it makes things much easier. Whoever's home will open the post.

All this secret squirrel 'I'm entitled to my privacy' stuff is just weird to me. What is it you need to keep private exactly?

As far as I'm concerned there's something dodgy about this as he's not going to be having important private client information on a flipping gmail account!

I'd be very sus personally OP and I certainly wouldn't be doing any more applications for him with that attitude.

I think some women enjoy it.

Theres no way OP can have kids, work FT and then mother her DH like this if she didn’t enjoy it.
You would just say no surely.

Most people would have told him to grow up and do it himself.

I disagree.

I think the main question is why OPs thread title is about her being upset over DH changing his password - rather than why he’s acting like a child and having to apply for jobs for him in the first place. And then him throwing a tantrum over it because mummy didn’t do it right.

This relationship is absolutely ridiculous.

Do you share a SM account as well?

If the word 'no' is not in your vocabulary, now would be a good time to start using it.

Good news then. Tell him he'll have to do his own job applications and don't speak of it again.

He should be completing and sending his own job applications. If he does not have time to do this, he should deprioritise something else.

This is like my friend who constantly whinges about being put upon by her husband. Packs his suitcase for him when he goes away etc.

It is infuriating to listen to. Just don’t do it ffs.

Who the fuck would want to employ a fully grown adult who couldn’t even be arsed to fill the application in himself.

This would put me off this guy - he sounds lazy and entitled.
Also why is he so angry with you when you’re trying to help? This is yet another off putting trait of his.
I bet you can do a lot better than this one!

Are you fucking kidding me why are you doing this for him?! Ffs, some women really don’t help themselves 🤦🏻‍♀️

He is entitled to privacy, but I’d tell him to sort his own job applications out going forward. He can’t have his cake and eat it.

You do know that some of us have things we prefer to keep private that are not for nefarious reasons? I gave the example earlier of my husband's involvement in politics. He deals with issues relating to other people's private and personal information that I have no right to have sight of.

I don't believe that OP has done anything wrong, but please stop with the nonsense that people only have privacy because they are cheating.

He can’t have it both ways.

He cannot expect you to be his personal secretary, on top of your full time job and doing the majority of childcare and housework 🙄, yet not allow you to use his correspondence address which enables you to do those admin tasks.

He's an ungrateful twat and, I would presume, has something to hide in his emails.

Tell him to do his own applications from now on.

What does he do for work that he can't do a form filling exercise properly? He just doesn't want to do it so his PA (wife) can do the pain in the arse stuff.

What else do you do for him that he can't do properly?

I don't think you did anything wrong OP, he is being an ungrateful arse about it in my opinion. As you are stressed out from doing the lion's share of the household / kids stuff, get him to take more responsibility for his job seeking.

But she didn't go into his emails - she accessed his Indeed account linked to his Google ID. He would get emails when she made a submission on his behalf.

Which she shouldn't be doing because he's an ungrateful douche spoon