To not want toys brought into the lounge?

extension?

That is what it was originally for - growing oranges.
It's usually an independent building on a big estate like Versailles.
I guess it's a faddish name for an extension with a lantern roof and I doubt there are any orange trees in it.🍊

Not according to Wiki. An orangery is just a conservatory.

An orangery or orangerie is a room or dedicated building, historically where orange and other non-hardy fruit trees are protected during the winter, as a large form of greenhouse or conservatory.[1] In the modern day an orangery could refer to either a conservatory or greenhouse built to house fruit trees, or a conservatory or greenhouse meant for another purpose.

For a long time I had a toy box that didn’t look like a toy box in the lounge where I could hide it all. Now they are a bit older their stuff is kept in their rooms. I don’t mind at all if they bring stuff down to play with - but it’s not everything all at once and it doesn’t get left in there

It sounds tough and two very young children is difficult, don't forget that. If you're trying to live how you used to or keep some semblance of your old organised and tidy life, I'm afraid you've had at least one kid too many 🤣

I think what you need to take from this thread is that your expectations are too high.

It would be possible (although hard work) to tackle this with one 4/5 year old. But you've got another tiny one to consider the needs of.

Unless you have the time and energy to put some robust organisation/boundaries/expectations/
authoritative practice in with your eldest, you are going to have to make peace with the fact your life is like this for a bit.

It's up to you to figure out how you're going to do this without making your children the culprit.

Good luck 💐

I got slaughtered on here years ago. Ours were each allowed to have two toys in the living room at any one time. When finished they had to be put away. The train track was allowed to stay up in the family room off the kitchen. Lego was there too but had to be put away before bedtime.

Get some boxes and make them put toys in the boxes when they done playing.

And, as I said earlier, reduce the number of toys they have.

In our house toys that were not kept in the playroom or their bedrooms were confiscated. They soon learned to keep them in the right place.

Why have kids if you hate stuff they come with? Its their house, teach them to tidy up and be responsible, buy them less toys, look where you're going.

Orangery - I always thought it was where you grow orange trees. Never heard it being used to describe a room in a house. Is this a regional thing?

We have a playroom that our kids generally refuse to properly play in. It basically acts as a toy storage room from which toys are then gradually strewn throughout the house.

Is one of the reasons your DS wanders about with stuff that he takes stuff into the lounge to watch tv? That’s why mine gravitate to the lounge, because it’s where the screen is 😐 so I often find an actual trail of objects from the playroom, past the front door and into the lounge. Sometimes they go vie the other direction as well and it goes playroom, kitchen, diner, lounge 🙄

My solution is similar to pps that we have a couple of toy baskets in the lounge and then everything else is kept in the playroom. I ask them to tidy up and usually my eldest (who is autistic) has a mini meltdown at the mere prospect of it. Eventually some stuff gets half arsed tidied. Everything else that’s not easily tidied away from the lounge gets chucked in the random basket and I sort it out every couple of weeks. I’m not spending hours every night organising stuff back into their homes, I just don’t have time for that and if I did I’d refuse to do it. There are no solutions here, only options most of which have already been suggested. But it’s really not the end of the world if they can’t find parts of toys for a while. The only way to really prevent that doesn’t involve hours of tidying each day is toy rotation and literally only having a few toys available at any one time.

In your shoes I’d be tempted to get a small toy storage unit for the lounge - seems to be where they want to play - and try a toy rotation system so they only have a few toys at a time. Then turn the playroom into a different kind of play space eg. Gym mats, stepping stones, bean bags etc? Or an office or something. See if it works better for your family.

No toys at all? I voted yabu. They are children and they should be able to have toys in whatever room they want. Just tidy them up throughout the day.

An orangery is a room with a solid roof with skylight, brick walls with some windows.

In contrast with a conservatory which is mainly glass - glass roof, glass walls/windows with low brick walls.

The performative “cringing” from posters who should know the difference is really odd.

My ex also hated DD’s toys anywhere except her bedroom.
May I suggest that if you wanted your DC not to bring their toys anywhere else than the orangery, that you make the orangery comfortable for yourself. So that you could stay there for long periods with your DC. He just wants your company nearby while he is playing. Other than that, have the toy box on wheels that he can chose toys, you put the box in the room you are in so he can play near you. When you move rooms he loads up the box to transfer the toys to the next room.

This!

What is orangery?? 🍊
(I'm not British by origin).
Yes, we have an open area downstairs as well and toys would probably irritate me.
However, I chose not to have kids.
You sound quite fun, though.

At your kids’ age, I was really scared of being alone. My home was from the 1700s, and as a young child, I really got spooked playing where my parents weren’t nearby (used to drive them nuts! In their mind, I had tons of space, but I just did not feel comfortable being upstairs when they weren’t close by).

Oh? Sorry, I approached it like that because you said they'd kick off if they couldn't find some puzzle pieces or whatever. It sounded like you were worried about their reaction to not having all their toys available at all times.

There's no need to put anything in bin bags ever and I would never suggest that, because of the message that sends. My son is 4.5 and I use 'the Santa shop' (charity shop) as a place his old toys go. But this is already set up as a positive thing to do with kindness, once he's grown out of things, they go onto the Santa shop so other children can enjoy them. I don't force it, but I would say if he was refusing to look after a toy then maybe it should go to the Santa shop for another little boy to enjoy. His reaction would be something I could work with. He's not arsed, they go. He's arsed, they stay but under the condition he takes care of them(/actually plays with them!).

I don't understand the issue if they're not arsed if their toys are missing?

Quickly chuck them in an aesthetically pleasing basket that can live in your living room and be done with it.

What do you mean, going the other way?

Put sensors on the doors of the orangery. When the kids try to take toys out of the orangery, the sensors will detect toys being taken out of it, and beep loudly. Or maybe put a sign on the lounge door —Adult zone only: trespassers and toys will be escorted back to orangery.

@ohnononofenton What a thread 😅 I’m sorry some of the replies have not been helpful and I apologise if my contributions are preaching to the choir.

1. ”Tidy” is a state of being. “Tidying” achieves this state. Why is this state desirable? What are the small steps towards it? Asking a young child to “tidy the toys” is like asking an adult to “cook dinner”. What’s for dinner? What’s already in the fridge? What do we need to buy? What’s the recipe? And plenty of unexpected speed bumps along the way. Tidying is just a vague to a child. You need to provide the structure and organisation as you are the one that knows what the state of “tidy” is. Things like (big mess of mixed up toys) “I’ll collect the dominoes and you collect the blocks” or both have a basket and race to see who can get the most magnatiles etc. Think of it as sorting the mess! It’s still a mess but at least like is with like. I know you said you had a clear out, but it sounds like the amount is overwhelming you and your son when it comes to tidying. I’m not saying get rid of more, but you can try putting things away and slowly reintroducing more as he gets better at tidying and keeping like with like.
2. I would let the children have toys all over the house, but I agree not a mess! The house is their home too and it always will be. This kind of control creates teenagers that won’t come out of their rooms. My mother had very intense rules about tidying and where children should be. I was never allowed to bring toys downstairs. I had a playroom, but it was a solitary place without adults so that’s what I learned. I’ve unpicked this in therapy and am doing differently with my own kids. We actually only use the bedrooms for sleeping and dressing. My own bedroom is completely toy free and that’s my sanity! The children have an organised presence in every other room.

the orangery is bigger than the lounge but the bookcase wouldn't fit.....oooooookaaaaaay

Lock the lounge while kids are awake.