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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My housekeeper is vey religious and it’s causing issues

365 replies

Claradiplomatique · 15/01/2026 11:15

We live overseas btw for anyone wondering.

So I have a lovely housekeeper who is very…religious.

She tells me off when she sees the children’s toys with horns (dragons, dinosaurs, Yoga Goat) or if she sees any children’s books about magic or witches. My own tarot cards and crystals are tucked into a drawer.

There is somewhat of a language barrier as I think we are having a normal conversation and she says “Jesus is coming soon” out of the blue.

There is also an ongoing battle between the nanny (different religion) and the housekeeper as nanny believes in evil eye etc and has given charms to me and the housekeeper says they are “satan’s work.” Nanny took the children to a Halloween craft workshop and came back with witchy dolls and a pumpkin which housekeeper said we should burn.

They do however both agree that our rescue street cat is sent from God to protect us.

AIBU? Do I double down on the no religion talk or let her go?

🧿🪬

OP posts:
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5
ProfessionalPirate · 15/01/2026 15:33

CaptainMyCaptain · 15/01/2026 15:22

Well you seem to be unable to understand the OP's situation.

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I made a direct reply to another poster’s comment. I accept it was not exactly pertinent to the OP’s housekeeper issue, but that’s what happens sometimes on threads. Why are you inserting yourself into this?

Biscofflatte · 15/01/2026 15:32

The cat comes first - the cat wants them to stay.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/01/2026 15:29

Deathby · 15/01/2026 14:58

Historically cats that appeared to you weren't gifts from god, quite the opposite actually. Best not share that with the nanny or the housekeeper though.

Bit of a result whoever sent them, if you had a grainstore needed to get you and the household through the next year, though.

Glitterella · 15/01/2026 15:26

CaptainMyCaptain · 15/01/2026 15:22

Well you seem to be unable to understand the OP's situation.

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It’s a MN thing. I have refrained from sharing the part of my life on MN which has me employing a full time cleaner and a gardener. Firstly posters assume Im British and have a go at me for obviously being well off enough to afford it and then when I explain I live in Africa I am a colonial oppressor. You cannot win on MN.

CaptainMyCaptain · 15/01/2026 15:22

ProfessionalPirate · 15/01/2026 15:10

Why on earth have you jumped to the conclusion that my experience is purely British? Because I can tell you it is not.

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Well you seem to be unable to understand the OP's situation.

ProfessionalPirate · 15/01/2026 15:10

CaptainMyCaptain · 15/01/2026 15:08

Where the OP is located and why is crucial to the whole thing. A purely British experience is irrelevant

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Why on earth have you jumped to the conclusion that my experience is purely British? Because I can tell you it is not.

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 15/01/2026 15:10

Claradiplomatique · 15/01/2026 11:18

The cat loves them both.

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The cat can't be trusted.

Fire her first...and hire a dog.

CaptainMyCaptain · 15/01/2026 15:08

ProfessionalPirate · 15/01/2026 13:35

You’ve gathered a lot of information from my post that wasn’t there. I was merely responding to the pp and stating that it’s easier to find a more professional standard of childcare in nurseries than by employing local nannies. Whether or not this is of any relevance to the OP I cannot tell, as I didn’t think she had told us where they are or what they do. In fact, it’s not even the childcare that’s an issue to the OP is it, its the housekeeper.

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Where the OP is located and why is crucial to the whole thing. A purely British experience is irrelevant

Ferrfoxache · 15/01/2026 15:05

😂It's just the whole hypocracy of it all and the fact that maybe i just respect myself a little bit more than to think religion will give me a sense of fullfilment. I guess It's a minefield that i am too afraid to step on.

Original poster
Claradiplomatique · 15/01/2026 15:03

ThriveAT · 15/01/2026 14:58

First world problems

Yes — like most topics on this board. Still allowed to talk about them.

OP posts:
Deathby · 15/01/2026 14:58

Historically cats that appeared to you weren't gifts from god, quite the opposite actually. Best not share that with the nanny or the housekeeper though.

ThriveAT · 15/01/2026 14:58

First world problems

PandorasSockBox · 15/01/2026 14:55

About three years ago I started on a project in IT with a colleague, who turned out to be very "born again" religious. Pleasant enough chap, but after a while, when every second sentence was "I am so happy to have Jesus in my life" it became somewhat irritating. After 3 months I resigned although there were other reasons, but this was also a factor!
In your position I would ask noth housekeeper and nanny to respect your views and tone down the relgious doctrine.

BlueJuniper94 · 15/01/2026 14:54

Ferrfoxache · 15/01/2026 14:19

No one should have a free pass to spew their bile in someone else's home no matter how devout. I'm not religious at all and i respect those who are but start shoving it in my face then that's a whole other ball game. So, yes they can and should leave it on the doorstep.

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You don't sound like you do respect those who are if they're "spewing bile" 🤣

BlueJuniper94 · 15/01/2026 14:52

SapphireSeptember · 15/01/2026 14:19

As a Christian who loves anything witchy and Halloweeny (and who has a deck of tarot cards and lots of crystals) send her my way. 😁

Genuine question here - surely Christianity (quite strongly) eschews witchiness, tarot and crystals etc.... how are you fitting that into sincere Christian beliefs 🤔

SevenYellowHammers · 15/01/2026 14:52

Stick with it. It would make a cracking sitcom.

BlueJuniper94 · 15/01/2026 14:49

sprigatito · 15/01/2026 11:53

I would get rid of them both and bring up my own kids/run my own home. I realise that sounds a bit joyless, but absolutely nobody gets to bring that superstitious magical thinking crap anywhere near my children’s minds.

Oh come on, isn't it better children as exposed to a variety of ways of seeing the world? Isn't this multiculturalism at its best? I thought we loved diversity 🤷‍♀️ are you worried your children will believe things you don't? Are you really lacking confidence in their intellectual and critical faculties that they need to be shielded from other beliefs?

YourBrickTiger · 15/01/2026 14:45

Claradiplomatique · 15/01/2026 11:15

We live overseas btw for anyone wondering.

So I have a lovely housekeeper who is very…religious.

She tells me off when she sees the children’s toys with horns (dragons, dinosaurs, Yoga Goat) or if she sees any children’s books about magic or witches. My own tarot cards and crystals are tucked into a drawer.

There is somewhat of a language barrier as I think we are having a normal conversation and she says “Jesus is coming soon” out of the blue.

There is also an ongoing battle between the nanny (different religion) and the housekeeper as nanny believes in evil eye etc and has given charms to me and the housekeeper says they are “satan’s work.” Nanny took the children to a Halloween craft workshop and came back with witchy dolls and a pumpkin which housekeeper said we should burn.

They do however both agree that our rescue street cat is sent from God to protect us.

AIBU? Do I double down on the no religion talk or let her go?

🧿🪬

I'm ok with her because she likes the cat.

She sounds fascinating. It reminds me of that episode of The Golden Girls where they hire Marguerite and she keeps leaving crosses under the bed.

StabbyCat · 15/01/2026 14:39

They’re both nuts.

Just repeat “I’m not interested in your beliefs about this” on a loop as and when necessary.

GarlicSound · 15/01/2026 14:38

You could cover all bases with some of these 😁

My housekeeper is vey religious and it’s causing issues
My housekeeper is vey religious and it’s causing issues
My housekeeper is vey religious and it’s causing issues
Arealnumber · 15/01/2026 14:31

It’s the nanny who is the problem.

Original poster
Claradiplomatique · 15/01/2026 14:29

artfiend · 15/01/2026 14:25

Same here. The events described by the OP seem to be taking place somewhere in the former Yugoslavia. My best guess would be Bosnia and Herzegovina. A more distant possibility could be a former Soviet republic closer to the Caucasus, but the presence of a Catholic housekeeper makes that less likely.

If my reading is correct, tensions among the household staff would likely be both religious and ethnic, with ethnic divisions possibly even stronger.

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Not far off!

OP posts:
aloris · 15/01/2026 14:27

Claradiplomatique · 15/01/2026 11:19

I am a writer but no, not writing a book on religious household staff!

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Maybe you should!!!

artfiend · 15/01/2026 14:25

Kingscallops · 15/01/2026 13:39

I knew the religion before even opening the thread.

Same here. The events described by the OP seem to be taking place somewhere in the former Yugoslavia. My best guess would be Bosnia and Herzegovina. A more distant possibility could be a former Soviet republic closer to the Caucasus, but the presence of a Catholic housekeeper makes that less likely.

If my reading is correct, tensions among the household staff would likely be both religious and ethnic, with ethnic divisions possibly even stronger.

Cortexiphan · 15/01/2026 14:25

I dunno I've seen paranormal activity 2 you might need her to pass on a curse to your sister.