To have had a baby after being with DH for less than six months?

Well that's not what you said. You claimed you had a baby six months after meeting him which was obvious clickbait bollocks.

What are you trying to achieve on this thread? What do you actually want to know and why?

So you mean you CONCEIVED a baby after only 6 months, not that you HAD a baby after 6 months. Good way to get noticed here.

I met my DH in August 1997 and our first was born in June 1998 😂. Quite a whirlwind!

Had 4 children in 6 years, still together now almost 30 years later.

Maybe it’s not the ‘done thing’ but there’s no reason why you can’t be very happy together. My parents married a month after meeting and I was born 9 months later. They had been together for 54 years when she died.

DH & i were together for 3 weeks, split for 3 weeks, then moved in together. I was pg within that first year.

We have been married 33 years this year.

Yes, but it is nevertheless a very confusing and badly written post.

You sound like a fun mix of impulsive and pragmatic, which probably makes you a good problem solver (or at least an interesting one). If MrItWasHelter is along for the ride you’ve got as good a chance as anyone, surely

It could be worse OP, I got pregnant (accidentally of course) on date three! It's not been the easiest to navigate tbh but neither of us would change our DC for the world

You’ve been with him for less than six months and have already had a baby? Maybe he’s not very good at maths (or biology), but once he figures it out, you’ll have some explaining to do.

In a perfect world, yes. But what about a woman who is 39 and wants a baby? Would you recommend she wait 3-5 years to really get to know her partner before TTC? 🧐

My daughter married her husband 88 days after they met, six years ago. They bought a house and have four children, 5,4 2 and 6 months. They are as mad as a box of frogs, but seem happy enough. Good luck to you.

I personally think it's reckless to ttc with someone you ve known months. You are choosing the father for your child with all th implications that being good or crap can have. Of course accidents happen but imo having a child with someone is a far bigger decision than something like getting married . This man will affect your child for good or evil all their lives.
Of course people can change etc but you have a better chance of knowing someone well if you are with them longer than a couple of months.

Well it seems to have worked out for you op.

I had a similar experience. I met my second husband in July (no, not last year🤔). I was pregnant by New Year and had our daughter in October.

We married the following August barely 2 years after meeting and with a 10 month old baby.

Like you I didn't have time to waste, I was 38, nearly 39, when my daughter was born.
Mind you, I also squeezed a divorce and 2 house moves into the year she was born ... talk about indicators of stress!

It was a mistake for me when I did it but sometimes it works out

Similar here OP. We weren’t even an official item when DD was accidentally conceived. 10 years and 2 more kids and a wedding later and we are happy. Funny how things work out.

Tbh I think that most couples who are still together when their children become adults have their children as their main thing in common, however long they were together beforehand. DH and I met at 18, married at 22 and I was 26 when we had our first DC, so 8 years of getting to know each other before we had our children. However those years before the DC came along seem so remote now. I almost feel as though we were different people…and in many ways we were.

Obviously we were very young, so that’s part of it - we grew up together in our twenties and learned to navigate life and parenthood together. But those years of parenting together have shaped us into who we are today. We had to learn to negotiate life with all its ups and downs through the lens of prioritising two little people whilst caring for each other. And sometimes we did that well and sometimes we didn’t, but we learned about ourselves and each other through those very experiences. And we learned how to really love each other whatever circumstances we were in.

When our youngest DC left home for uni, DH and I were on our own for the first time in 21 years. And we loved it! And we still love it 7 years on. We loved our years bringing up the DC and we love it now when it’s just us. Not because we can now enjoy what we had in common when we were 23 but because we’ve built a life together and strengthened our relationship in and through raising a family. It has moulded and shaped us, knocked off our rough edges, taught us not to be so selfish and given us shared experiences and memories that exist even though the DC are fully fledged adults now. We always had a mix of shared activities (mostly altogether as a family) and things we did on our own but it’s not the stuff that we do or have done that makes life together so great, it’s the bond we’ve built and the love we still share. I’m as happy having Saturday morning brunch in a local cafe with him as I am on some grand travel adventure, because we enjoy just being together. So hopefully when your DC have left home that’s what you will have in common - the love and bond that comes with raising a family together and allowing that to shape you for the good and for each other.

It’s a bit of a lottery. I had been with my ex for a “normal” 3 years when I got pregnant, and we ended up divorced. Amicably, but divorced nonetheless.

Your FiL sounds fab 👑 😆

Ah love this! He does sound like a keeper! And how wonderful to have such lovely grandparents too.

Same for me and my husband, been married nearly 14 years now. But I do think a bit of luck was involved!

DH and I started dating in December, by April I found out I was pregnant (completely unplanned), July we bought a house and DS1 was born the following a December. We got married when DS1 was 2yo.

The other challenge we had is that I was only 23 when I got pregnant.

We’ve now been married 25 years and despite having similar worries about how we’d cope as the boys grew up it’s actually been lovely to have time together from the first time ever really.

It’s not been easy but I wouldn’t change anything.

I got pregnant after id been with now-DH for 6 months too. We were mid/late 30s so not a disaster. I miscarried though and had DC1 exactly 2 years later.

I’ve sometimes wondered what it would have been like if I’d had that baby. There were moments with a young baby that were really tough, and it would have been even tougher if the relationship hadn’t yet been solid.

I’d also always wonder if he only stuck with me because of the baby.

So as devastated as I was about the miscarriage I think it worked out better. We also had a lot of fun in those 2 years pre children - with hindsight we maybe should have waited a bit longer, but age wasn’t on our side .

Wow that’s amazing! You’re right that we have no way of knowing how good our fertility is. I’ll be 37 going on 38 when we’re able to start TTC due to circumstances, which does worry me, but there’s always fertility treatment, I suppose. I also believe I could make peace with being child-free if we have no success at all, but not sure how DP would feel.

When you say “it’s not perfect” above, do you mean the usual stuff of family life and the stress of raising kids, which being together longer before having a baby wouldn’t mitigate against (ie all couples seem to experience some impact to their relationship after children, regardless of how long they’ve been together). Or are you referring to something that you later discovered about your DH that may have given you pause for thought had you discovered it before getting pregnant? If you see what I mean.

46 now and definitely feeling every day of it at the moment!

I do think things move quicker when you’re a bit older and when you both know exactly what you want. Also I think I had already been through the mill with various aspects of my life, not just relationships but that too, and so I did have faith in my own resilience if nothing else. Plus I know so many stories of people together for years and years and they still get blindsided.

I was with my ex 13 years, absolutely believed I knew him inside out and the way that ended was the shock of my life - I don’t think length of time together is any guarantee really. If DH turns out to be a similarly secret bastard at least I know I’ve proved my ability to withstand it before!

I don't understand the question, when you've been together for years now. Why are you asking, when everything has worked out fine,?

Though there’s no marriage or baby yet, I feel that way about DP! I can’t believe my luck. My last relationship (which at the time was my most serious relationship to date) ended when I was 34 and I thought it was game over. Met DP at random out in the wild (at a rave!) age 35 and it has been great since. Yes, it’s the honeymoon phase still, but I definitely have a ‘good feeling’ about him 🥰