My ExH and I have DC. We currently live about 1.5 hours drive from him, about 2 hours all in via public transport. On his weekend (EOW) he picks them up and drops them off. He does this via a mix of his family driving him and public transport (normally picks them up via public transport and gets a lift from his parents when dropping them home. There’s nothing that is stopping him from driving or learning to drive other than he cba. I medically cannot drive, although my DH drives, I can’t. ExH also doesn’t pay any maintenance or buy Dc anything they need, does buy them birthday/Christmas presents but that’s it, I have to send clothing for them sometimes when they’re going to his. He actually lives with his parents as well and from what Dc tell me, they cook for Dc/buy them their clothes for their house etc.
We are looking to move areas. There is an area that we are interested in which takes about 1 hour 20 mins from his to drive to but there’s no direct public transport / the changes etc add up to 3-4 hours each way. This is due to ExH living rurally as he moved back in with his parents. Eldest Dc told me that they heard his parents saying to him that they’re not going to do the lifts for him for much longer. Aibu to think that this is up to him to sort out re picking/dropping them off on his weekends if we do choose this area or Aibu to consider this area? It’s been 5 years they’ve been giving him lifts when he could’ve learned to drive. He’s admitted that it’s purely out of laziness/lack of desire that he hasn’t learnt.