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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Cried for 90 mins

612 replies

draft123 · 13/01/2026 09:21

Last night my little one woke and was creaming at 4.15am. I thought something was wrong but he just wanted to go downstairs. I tried to comfort him in my arms but nothing was settling him. Took him in my bed which he rarely comes into and we watched my phone. Probably shouldn't have done that but I can't stand his crying.

He wasn't sleeping but it was nice to have him under the duvet with me.

After 10 mins I put him back in his cot and his room. Same issue occured again - crying to go downstairs.

I just left him in the cot until he eventually slept at 6am.

I did go in one or twice into the room but honestly I can't settle him when he wants to go downstairs and I told him it's dark outside.

I was watching him on the room camera so he wasn't in any danger.

Did I do the wrong thing? Next door is hard of hearing so won't wake him. I live just with toddler.

OP posts:
Dillydollydingdong · 13/01/2026 09:38

No, I don't think you were wrong. So he was just crying because he wanted something? He wanted to go downstairs. He wasn't hungry, not thirsty, not in pain or needing a nappy change? I'm afraid he needs to learn that night time means sleep time, for you as well as him.

draft123 · 13/01/2026 09:37

AnneLovesGilbert · 13/01/2026 09:31

I imagine he cares less for being left alone in distress.

Distress is him wanting to go downstairs. Is that distress of a tantrum? It was 4/5am. Too early for both of us.

OP posts:
draft123 · 13/01/2026 09:36

Devilsmommy · 13/01/2026 09:34

Playing him videos on your phone is only going to make him wake up. Surely if he was in your bed watching video then he could have just fallen asleep in your bed with you instead?

He had no interest in going to sleep, just wanted to go downstairs. He was crying and his crying wasn't stopping. It was a way to stop his crying instead of going downstairs.

OP posts:
Devilsmommy · 13/01/2026 09:34

Playing him videos on your phone is only going to make him wake up. Surely if he was in your bed watching video then he could have just fallen asleep in your bed with you instead?

draft123 · 13/01/2026 09:33

AnneLovesGilbert · 13/01/2026 09:31

If you were distraught for an hour and a half would you want to be left by yourself in the dark? Or would you have wanted the person who’s meant to love and care for you to comfort you and be close to you? Would you leave him crying for that long in the day or is it only okay at night?

Was he left alone? Did I not state I went to attend to him, out him in my bed, try to comfort him? Went in a few times? He would only stop crying by going downstairs at 4/5am. It was too early.

OP posts:
MatildaTheCat · 13/01/2026 09:33

He’ll be fine.

AnneLovesGilbert · 13/01/2026 09:31

draft123 · 13/01/2026 09:30

He also isn't bothered about bed sharing. I have a bed in his room but he doesn't care for bed sharing

I imagine he cares less for being left alone in distress.

Iloveeverycat · 13/01/2026 09:31

draft123 · 13/01/2026 09:29

2 years plus 2 months

So was he crying for over an hour. I could never let any of my 4 left to cry it would break my heart.

AnneLovesGilbert · 13/01/2026 09:31

If you were distraught for an hour and a half would you want to be left by yourself in the dark? Or would you have wanted the person who’s meant to love and care for you to comfort you and be close to you? Would you leave him crying for that long in the day or is it only okay at night?

draft123 · 13/01/2026 09:30

He also isn't bothered about bed sharing. I have a bed in his room but he doesn't care for bed sharing

OP posts:
draft123 · 13/01/2026 09:29

2 years plus 2 months

OP posts:
Strawberryfruitcorner · 13/01/2026 09:28

How old is he?