To be furious at my ‘supposedly’ best friend?

And THIS is the sort of reason that we are eloping and just getting married abroad without inviting anyone!!

I mean we’ve got a lot of people with issue with it but unless they are planning on paying for our wedding personally, it literally has nothing to do with anyone what we plan to do.

OP - do not be that person who tries to tell someone else how to do their wedding.

It shows! You are being utterly ridiculous and acting like a spoiled child.

Grow up.

I'm not sure her sister would have felt great if she'd chosen you either, so your friend was likely in a lose-lose situation. Now that you've had your reaction, maybe think about it from her perspective?

With kindness, you really need to grow up, Stating that you are ‘frankly furious’ is ridiculous. Things happen in life. Growing up my best friend and I always talked about weddings and yes promised we would both be each others bridesmaids, in the end I had no bridesmaids at all - she was very supportive. She got married before me and had her sister and cousin, she did say her family esp mum and dad expected cousin to be bridesmaid and she wanted to make them happy, I totally got it. Yes I was sad but I fully supported her. We were both 21 at the time— that’s friendship.

Do you think the reason why you’re annoyed may be because she’s using your pregnancy as an excuse?

Given she has used this as an excuse, I would also use this as an excuse not to help. If she asks you to run around doing her favours, tell her sorry, I’m pregnant.

You should be bloody grateful

Grow up.

Had a deal! Grow up you’re not in the playground now! Maybe it’s because you’re pregnant with loads of hormones surging that you are being totally irrational!

Are you serious OP ? Just be grateful she’s asked you to be a bridesmaid. I can’t believe you are being so childish.

Good Grief!
You are expecting a baby, how many people would be delighted to be you right now - don’t brush that thought away, I’m being real not mean.

Trust me, the sister would be so much more upset than you are if she was not MOH.

I would also kindly ask you to listen to yourself. I don’t know many “best friends” who would place themselves above a sister when it came to something like this. You need to demonstrate what a good friend you really are by sucking this up and letting go. I understand why you are upset and I don’t want to be harsh, but please grow up.

Of cause she is going to have her sister for moh if they are close. You’re a bridesmaid that’s good enough. The fact you’re pregnant as well. Your friend is right. Takes a lot of pressure off you

I had no bridesmaids at my wedding...saved a whole load of drama and expense. Wonderful.

FWIW
I was the only bridesmaid aged 4 and that was the only time I have ever been a bridesmaid.
My oldest friend got married in a fairly big cathedral wedding, all her attendants were under 18.
My sister got married, twice. First time she had 1 bridesmaid aged about 10, second time her 2 daughters were bridesmaids, but I was asked to do a reading.
Old friend from university got married, I was a guest, although many other friends expressed surprise that I wasn't a bridesmaid.
Was I disappointed or upset, no. It never even occurred to me to think like that. In fact I would probably have said thanks, but no thanks to being a bridesmaid.
I think the OP should develop other aspirations.

You can be upset…. Valid feelings….however you also sound young and incredibly immature. Of course her sister could trump you as MOH!!!! Also sisters argue all the time, but can have the strongest bond ever…. I know because I have one!

the fact you want to end a friendship over this is…. Quite frankly…. Ridiculous!!! Also you are pregnant and being a mother at the beginning can feel quite isolating and lonely…. Again I have been through this as a mother myself…. So you will want to keep the good friends you’ve already got!!!

I think she should have maybe had a conversation rather than just let you find out that way but you can’t expect her to hold up her end of the deal you made in primary. Would you still have picked her if you hadn’t made that deal? If you’re a bridesmaid you’ll still have a say in the hen surely, you can definitely tell her sister your ideas.

just keep these immature self indulgent feelings quiet and do not talk about this to the bride or anyone else connected to the bride. This is her special day and you’ve already got an important role.

Yabu. You can still help with the hen planning.

You picked her to be MOH as she is your best friend. She picked her MOH as she is her sister, also a popular choice.

If you picked her because of a secondary school deal or to get picked back that was daft.

You are still her best friend (unless you cause a massive drama over this, that would be really unkind)

This is a silly thing to get worked up about and you’re massively over reacting like an immature teenager.