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Original poster

I want half in the divorce. Am I likely to get it.

258 replies

Divorcein40swoman · 12/01/2026 00:39

Posted here for traffic ..

Just looking for some legal advice.
Married 6 years . Together 15
I left him... moved out the house when he was away .. tod him afterwards
No children
He put down £200k for the house which came from the sale of a flat he owned I his name before we married.
Joint mortgage each paying half.
I continued to pay after I left which was last year
I want the divorce
I have no savings ... he has savings in an account in his name around 30k
He has an isa opened in his name after we married
We each have a pension. He can take his pension 10 years earlier than me as he's older
I earn slightly more than him and will be at work longer than him due to our ages

I want 50/50 of everything. The savings. The ISA and especially the house.
He's upset as he's not going to get a decent mortgage at his age . He also wants the £200k he put it to be given back. Us clear the mortgage and come away with about 50k each. I want half !!
What's likely to happen

OP posts:
bananafake · 12/01/2026 01:25

You’re unbelievable.

He can only retire earlier because he’s older. Thwt means you have ten years longer to build up security. Why haven’t you saved yourself if you earn more than your husband?

Without his deposit you wouldn’t have been able to buy a place which has enabled you both to build equity in the property. Take half the equity after the £200k is returned to your husband and you’re lucky if you get much else.

LunchtimeNaps · 12/01/2026 01:23

This is why I won't get married. Shocking.

Original poster
Divorcein40swoman · 12/01/2026 01:22

I am the soon to be ex wife in this scenario. I am not disgruntled. He wanted to make the marriage work. I checked out and wasn't happy. He wasn't a bad person . He asked me to come back many many times . I just wanted to find myself I suppose. I just wasn't happy and i grew apart from him. Because of this he accused me of cheating . I was just going away and out with friends more and trying to live my life. It put strain on us and I thought it was better for everyone if I just left.

OP posts:
SumUp · 12/01/2026 01:21

Just find a good lawyer and see what they advise. I know you want to save the money but this is probably the wisest course.

ThatsPlentyIsa · 12/01/2026 01:11

Is this a reverse? (Ie, are you the disgruntled husband rehearsing your soon to be ex’s likely grabtacular arguments to get some potential defences constructed?)

ScholesPanda · 12/01/2026 01:10

You'd be better off putting this in legal I'd have thought, and seeking proper legal advice.

I know what I think should happen morally but I won't be the judge deciding the case.

FancyCatSlave · 12/01/2026 01:10

My ex didn’t get anything close to 50% of my total assets so I don’t think you have a hope in hell if he gets decent legal representation. Everything I had pre-marriage stayed with me.

50/50 of all assests, regardless of what mumsnet will tell you, is not at all the default. It’s just the starting point. Ex got half of one property, but the considerable equity I contributed (he contributed none and was financially reckless) was recognised. As was his inability to manage his finances. My pension was vastly more and I kept it all although to be fair he didn’t push for it and we share a young child.

You’d probably get more than £50k but not half. A judge won’t give a shit if it means you are in rented as opposed to mortgaged. You earn well and are younger so have more earning power.

ActiveTiger · 12/01/2026 01:08

You just look super greedy after a short marriage. Your not entitled to the money he put into the house, how do you think that's fair and tbh of you were paying some or mortgage wouldn't that be your part of rent while you were there. A judge would very much take into consideration how short a marriage how much he put in etc etc and how old he or you is etc

caringcarer · 12/01/2026 01:07

As you have the capacity to work longer than he does it's very likely you will be awarded less, especially as a 6 year marriage is not long and no DC to consider. The judge is likely to look at he put in £200k and you put in nothing. Then you split bills equally so give him back his £200k then split any equity made on the House equally between you. A judge might award you half the savings as they occured after the marriage. The overriding factor the judge will take into account as no DC is the length of time you both have before you move on to pension. You will have longer to rebuild and earn more so therefore need less.

Original poster
Divorcein40swoman · 12/01/2026 01:06

OpheliaNightingale · 12/01/2026 01:03

From what I understand, any assets he was in possession of prior to meeting you will not count as marital assets. Similarly, anything either of you acquired after the date deemed to be the separation date won’t count either. I’m not a lawyer though. You both need legal advice.

Would the separation date be the date I moved out ? I am still on the mortgage and paying my half.

OP posts:
OpheliaNightingale · 12/01/2026 01:03

From what I understand, any assets he was in possession of prior to meeting you will not count as marital assets. Similarly, anything either of you acquired after the date deemed to be the separation date won’t count either. I’m not a lawyer though. You both need legal advice.

Original poster
Divorcein40swoman · 12/01/2026 01:02

Squiggles23 · 12/01/2026 01:01

The fact that you can't buy anywhere doesn't mean you should get all his money OP!

I certainly don't want all his money. I just want what I am legally entitled to. Marrital assets are split 50/50

OP posts:
LighthouseLED · 12/01/2026 01:01

£50k would be a pretty decent deposit on a 1 bed flat in most places. If you’re in your 40s, as your username suggests, you should be able to buy somewhere with that as a deposit and get a mortgage.

Squiggles23 · 12/01/2026 01:01

The fact that you can't buy anywhere doesn't mean you should get all his money OP!

ultracynic · 12/01/2026 00:59

Did you pay rent or anything towards the flat while you lived there?

Shinyandnew1 · 12/01/2026 00:59

That won't buy me anywhere though.

Could you buy anywhere on your own before you met him!? If not, then why should a short marriage mean his cash should prop you up on the property ladder?

Original poster
Divorcein40swoman · 12/01/2026 00:57

MO0N · 12/01/2026 00:55

Who will win, the ex or the OP?
Who ever can afford the best solicitor?

I am seeing a solicitor for a free hour this week. I have told him to do the same and then we should talk. He replied and asked me to take 50 grand and leave him in peace. I don't want to use solicitors if we can help it as it will get expensive so I am hoping he doesn't try and hang this out and make it difficult

OP posts:
ReadingTeaLeaves · 12/01/2026 00:57

Please ignore internet froth.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 12/01/2026 00:56

Divorcein40swoman · 12/01/2026 00:54

This is basically what he's saying. That won't buy me anywhere though. All the advice I am seeing online says savings investments pensions and so on are marital assets. He opened his own savings account when we had been married a year. Same with the isa he took out. Pension he had for 15 years before we met. He's paid into 5 or 6 years of it whilst married .

I just want to make sure I go into this knowing what I am entitled to. They are marital assets

Show quote history

What does your solicitor say? Hopefully you won’t get any of the 200k. You need to earn your own money and live off that

MO0N · 12/01/2026 00:55

Who will win, the ex or the OP?
Who ever can afford the best solicitor?

Original poster
Divorcein40swoman · 12/01/2026 00:54

Shinyandnew1 · 12/01/2026 00:51

He put down £200k for the house

So, he gets that back and then you split any equity left.

This is basically what he's saying. That won't buy me anywhere though. All the advice I am seeing online says savings investments pensions and so on are marital assets. He opened his own savings account when we had been married a year. Same with the isa he took out. Pension he had for 15 years before we met. He's paid into 5 or 6 years of it whilst married .

I just want to make sure I go into this knowing what I am entitled to. They are marital assets

OP posts:
FrazzledHippy · 12/01/2026 00:52

I don't know about legally but morally he should walk away with the first 200k out of the house then the rest is split between you

Shinyandnew1 · 12/01/2026 00:51

He put down £200k for the house

So, he gets that back and then you split any equity left.

Original poster
Divorcein40swoman · 12/01/2026 00:50

andthat · 12/01/2026 00:49

Why should he fund that out of the £200k he invested before you came along?

Show quote history

He didn't. He had a flat. We lived in it together. We then got married. He sold it and used the money to buy the marital home in joint names. We had been married for a while when we brought it

OP posts:
andthat · 12/01/2026 00:49

Divorcein40swoman · 12/01/2026 00:46

Because I have to pay my half of the mortgage and then rent and bills on my new place . Feed myself. Travel to work. Going out . Etc

Show quote history

Why should he fund that out of the £200k he invested before you came along?