To want to leave my partner over a chocolate cake

Been with my partner 3 years. The relationship has been fine and we have been genuinely in love. Lived together 2 years.

I’m unexpectedly pregnant, 7 weeks. Partner was terrified at first but has come round to it and says he is looking forward to parenthood but there have been repeated instances of unpleasant and lazy behaviour from him.

I work Monday to Friday 9-6. It’s been shit as I’m exhausted with this pregnancy but life doesn’t stop when you’re pregnant so I’m pushing through it even though it is shit. His work is having a quiet spell at the moment which means he’s only working around 20 hours a week but getting full pay (he’s on a 45 hour contract.) Cooking is all left to me as it “stresses him out” and occasions where I’ve begged him to cook as I’m exhausted and feel sick I have been met with weaponised incompetence, magically forgetting how to make meals he used to make all the time before I moved in. Even household stuff such as folding clothes after they’ve been washed, he will fold them in such a ridiculous manner that I genuinely wonder how the fuck he’s managed to fold it in that shape and then I have to do it all again myself.

I have snapped today. On Saturday I visited my parents who live in another city 2 train rides away. In the city where I changed trains I had an hour to kill. There is a viral slice of chocolate cake (I know…) on Instagram that has been my pregnancy craving, and they had a store in this particular city. They do online orders too but I can never get one as they sell out. I decided to go and treat myself to one. Keep in mind this is a HUGE slice of cake and is essentially a full-size cake just in the shape of a slice.

I had a tiny bit of it (literally one spoon worth) at my parents Saturday evening but it made me feel sick so I put it away. Partner picked me up in the evening and I went straight to bed as I was knackered, cake was left in the fridge.

I was in bed until 1pm today due the pregnancy fatigue, woke up craving the cake. I go down to find he’s eaten the entire thing.

I snapped a bit and stated he knew I’d been craving it. I explained I didn’t mind him having some as it’s huge but to eat all of it was horrible of him. He’s telling me I’m hormonal and need to get over myself but it feels malicious. His excuse was that he was hungry because I didn’t cook last night and didn’t make breakfast this morning. I’m so fucking annoyed at him

I’m so sorry, I’m not sure what you want from this post… Leave now. I’m not sure on your situation but this is and sounds like it has been a red flag! I get that you put up with it for so long but your little one doesn’t deserve that. Iv been there and could have had a child with a previous partner who sounds like this thank god my life took a diffrent turn. It’s true it will only get worse then depending on work likely hood is he will be redundant if it carts on the he will be at home “wanting to be a stay at home dad” or “can’t find a job I want” it sounds like it’s you yourself and I. GET OUT NOW. You know you don’t want this forever it’s not hormones it’s a sign that he doesn’t respect or consider you. Why would you want that for your future. Check out now. Decide what you want from life and see if you can get your ducks in a row and start afresh what ever that means for you. But may this live NEVER find my daughter, I’d rather her alone than have the bare minimum.

And yet the OP had so much to offer.

Pregnancy

Chocolate cake

Lazy partner who thinks it's a woman's job to cook his dinner and breakfast.

It's produced more froth than a rabid dog, which I expect was the purpose of it.

500 answers in and zero response from the OP????

Been with my partner 3 years. The relationship has been fine and we have been genuinely in love. Lived together 2 years.

I’m unexpectedly pregnant, 7 weeks. Partner was terrified at first but has come round to it and says he is looking forward to parenthood but there have been repeated instances of unpleasant and lazy behaviour from him.

I work Monday to Friday 9-6. It’s been shit as I’m exhausted with this pregnancy but life doesn’t stop when you’re pregnant so I’m pushing through it even though it is shit. His work is having a quiet spell at the moment which means he’s only working around 20 hours a week but getting full pay (he’s on a 45 hour contract.) Cooking is all left to me as it “stresses him out” and occasions where I’ve begged him to cook as I’m exhausted and feel sick I have been met with weaponised incompetence, magically forgetting how to make meals he used to make all the time before I moved in. Even household stuff such as folding clothes after they’ve been washed, he will fold them in such a ridiculous manner that I genuinely wonder how the fuck he’s managed to fold it in that shape and then I have to do it all again myself.

I have snapped today. On Saturday I visited my parents who live in another city 2 train rides away. In the city where I changed trains I had an hour to kill. There is a viral slice of chocolate cake (I know…) on Instagram that has been my pregnancy craving, and they had a store in this particular city. They do online orders too but I can never get one as they sell out. I decided to go and treat myself to one. Keep in mind this is a HUGE slice of cake and is essentially a full-size cake just in the shape of a slice.

I had a tiny bit of it (literally one spoon worth) at my parents Saturday evening but it made me feel sick so I put it away. Partner picked me up in the evening and I went straight to bed as I was knackered, cake was left in the fridge.

I was in bed until 1pm today due the pregnancy fatigue, woke up craving the cake. I go down to find he’s eaten the entire thing.

I snapped a bit and stated he knew I’d been craving it. I explained I didn’t mind him having some as it’s huge but to eat all of it was horrible of him. He’s telling me I’m hormonal and need to get over myself but it feels malicious. His excuse was that he was hungry because I didn’t cook last night and didn’t make breakfast this morning. I’m so fucking annoyed at him

I emphasis with you! My husband can be like this with some things (mainly sweet). For my birthday last year my best friend bought me a massive bag of kinder chocolates, pretty much every type of kinder chocolate you can get. I’m not a huge chocolate fan and don’t eat a lot of it, but I do love kinder so it was lovely gift. I said to my husband it would take me 6 months to get through it all and offered him some. Anyway about a week later I really fancied some chocolates went looking for it and couldn’t find it anywhere. He’d eaten the whole lot! Took my gesture of offering him some that evening to mean he could eat the whole fucking lot. Honestly there was such a huge amount. I’m not sure if I was more horrified he’s eaten my birthday present or the fact he’d actually consumed that much chocolate in a week. Needless to say, I went crazy (I was also pregnant) and he now doesn’t touch my food.

I would be absolutely furious OP! Pregnancy cravings are no joke and it’s just fucking rude. I know the cake you are talking about and if he didn’t buy it, why he would even think to eat the whole thing and not leave you any is a complete piss take. What a pig!! I know I’ve just moaned about my DH, but he kept the ship afloat while I was pregnant, he cooked all the meals despite not knowing how, he just got on with it and taught himself. Yours needs to sort himself out quick!!