Consultant appointment - we used to date

I couldn't do it. Far too awkward for everyone, and stress inducing for you on top of having the procedure in the first place. Change it now.

OP - I'm a hospital consultant and if someone I used to date was booked in to see me, I'd want it rearranged. I suggest you email the consultant's secretary, explain the situation, and ask to see someone else.

Is contact the admin team as it’s a very personal procedure and see what they say. Chances are if you are ok with it then he will be too

This , and he will care even less about how you look .

I think I'd do that. Simply tell them he's known to you on a personal level. If he were aware he might prefer not to see you anyway.

Definitely ask for someone else that’s so awkward for both of you,

In advance ask for a chaperone but don't go into any explanations. I believe you can request simply because you want one and then keep it very medical /professional.
If necessary you can say "I thought it possible we might have met socially some time ago but as this appointment was very important I didn't want to rearrange. "
Unless you decide you really do want to see someone else.
Best of luck.

This. As a courtesy to him please flag this. He has no way of knowing you are about to become a patient. It is not professional for him to treat you and he will ideally probably recuse himself once he realises.

I was going to ask if it was a colonoscopy.
You really don't want to go through all that prep then have to rebook if that's what it is.

Is it a colonoscopy?

I turned up for my last one and it was the parent from one of dc’s clubs that I know fairly well! They asked if anyone else was free to do the procedure but there wasn’t. I was offered the chance to rebook but as I’d had my light diet and done all the prep meticulously I was reluctant. We both agreed that we were ok to go ahead and get it done, there were a couple of other people in the room and it was nothing but professional throughout, except for the ‘see you at training tomorrow’ comment as I left!

The person concerned will be professional, you could ask to rearrange the appt but it will no doubt cause a delay. I think in your position I’d call the secretary to explain and ask if there will be anyone else covering that clinic that you could see.

Clinician here.

I'd be tempted to speak to him directly. You have history so ask him on what you should do. You may have a reassuring conversation and actually be happy to have the procedure done by him and have great care.

Or he may say, he'll get you in with a colleague so you wont get delayed. If you go via secretaries - it may get delayed.

You need to arrange to see a different consultant @Kingcole3 It's weird and innappropriate. Especially as you were in a relationship previously, and also very intimate! Speak to his secretary, (or the team secretary whatever it is....) Ask for someone else, and say it's because you know him, and it's a bit awkward.

I turned up at the GP surgery to have a cervical smear one time, about 17 years ago, and when I was called in I saw that the nurse was a neighbour (Helen) - from 10 doors down. Her daughter went to school with my DC, and she knew quite a few of the mums!

I was like She said 'oh, I didn't realise ... sorry... err, do you want to rebook?' I thought I'd sound silly if I said yes, so I said 'errr no it's ok. ' (Even though I was cringeing, and really didn't want to go through with it!)

She said 'ok then, ummm, when was your last period?' I said 'I finished maybe 2 days ago.' She said 'oh it's too soon after it to do a smear test sorry, can you go out to reception, and rebook it for this day next week?'

I said 'of course' and we both smiled, and let out a huge sigh of relief. We were both relieved I think. 😆 Whenever I booked it thereafter, I said 'anyone but Helen! No issues with her, but I kind of know her!'

THIS. It's far better that it's all changed now, and the OP is allocated a different person, rather than turning up and HE says 'whoops, no!' And then the OP has to wait weeks on end for another appointment!

THIS. It's far better that it's all changed now, and the OP is allocated a different person, rather than turning up and HE says 'whoops, no!' And then the OP has to wait weeks on end for another appointment!

He’s a professional consultant he’ll not be bothered that he slept with you ten years ago.
dont delay medical treatment I’d go.

He might feel awkward and not be able to concentrate fully! Unless it is life threatening I would definitely change.

Consultants don't always see patients, there is usually a team. When you sign in ask not to see him

100% not awkward unless either of you make it so. He’ll presumably be professional given his profession he’s seen it all before.

have a comment ready for when you first see him ‘ah I wondered from you name if it was you, it’s nice to see you again’ and move forward don’t delay your treatment because of it.

maybe tell your DH tho but don’t make a mountain out of a molehill

Yes I think you need to contact the admin team. He might not be able to see you or be comfortable.

I think you’re making this into a bigger deal than it needs to be, whichever way you want to go.

Firstly - the NHS has policies on staff dealing with the public and people they know. If
you were to tell the NHS you’re not comfortable with seeing that person, it’s not an issue. The only problem as you say, is delaying the issue because they will likely cancel the appointment and rebook with another consultant at a later date, as opposed to keeping the same appointment and you seeing a new consultant during that slot.

But it’s likely better you do that, then see a consultant you’re not going to be comfortable with or trust 100%.

Well, HE might not want to treat you either, given the circumstances. I'd phone the secretary and give a heads up.

That’s really awkward, I would call the appointments team first to see if there more than one consultant and if you can switch to someone else. Otherwise if it’s urgent I guess just go and don’t make out you recognise him.

I would keep the appointment, your health is more important! It was a long time ago and you have both moved on

I think it would be very strange to attempt to not bring it up. Most people would remember someone they dated and slept with multiple times just a decade ago.

Depending on the issue, this might not bother me at all. But it is likely best to request a new appointment if it doesn’t delay treatment too much.

As PP has suggested, phone the consultant's secretary.