Consultant appointment - we used to date

Perhaps you could call the secretaries and explain there is history there and you do not feel it appropriate to see this particular consultant. To be honest I am not even sure if he would be allowed / or it be ethical for him to treat you. It would only cause further delays if you turned up to the appointment and he refused to see you. He has to protect himself after all. I could be wrong about this as it's a historical relationship but the secretaries will be the ones to advise on this situation.

I find it weird that you wouldn't tell your husband.

In that case I'd ring his secretary and explain . If it was something less embarrassing I'd just go

I can assure you this consultant may well remember you and he may even allude to your liasions but there is no way he will be embarrassed and neither should you be embarrassed. The only thing on his mind will be treating your problem. There is also the fact there will be a nurse in attendance so all in all not a problem. I'd smile, nod in recognition, perhaps even say how are you? then let the appointment progress.

I love how many people have totally ignored the question you asked.

I’d mention in passing, probably framed through the hassle lens. ‘This consultant has the same name as someone I went out with for a bit, it’ll be a faff if it’s the same person and Thats an issue’.

Mainly because because not mentioning would be stranger.

As a nurse I have had to recuse myself from looking after certain patients because I knew them personally .I don't think its fair on the patient.

Firstly tell your dh. If its genuinely in the past then why hide it? If it comes out later you will look guilty of something.

Secondly I would contact the conaultants secretary, explain that there ia a personal connection between you and the consultant and you and ask what their suggestion would be.

Ring the Consultant's secretary and ask if it's possible to be moved to a different Consultant. Be honest, and say that it's nothing personal against him, but you dated him many years ago. You're now married, so he wouldn't recognise your surname, and wouldn't realise it's you until the day. It would be a bit awkward and for both your sakes it would better if you were assigned a different Consultant.

Several ‘consultations’ I’ve had over recent yrs, via NHS, have been with other Dr. members of the team. But all the letters have had the (?) Principal Consultants ‘signature’.
Tho some do state at some point in the paperwork that the above could well be the situation for patients to expect.

I’m almost certain he won’t want to perform any kind of intimate procedure on someone he has a sexual history with (or is even technically allowed to), opens him up to a great deal of risk. I would definitely flag with his secretary.

This...

I had a colonoscopy and when the consultant walked in he was a parent I know from school.
I was already to go...there were 3 nurses in the room with us and apart from putting the tube in I was covered throughout.
I didn't think it was worth going back on the waiting list and he was extremely pleasant as were the nurses!

I used to work with my GP before he became a GP and still find it awkward. I think we kind of pretend we don't know each other. I know it is stupid but I actually want to change GP's because of it. I can't imagine how much more awkward this would be in your situation but I guess you only have to see him once maybe ?

This response is the best.
As a man I am perfectly aware that my wife slept with people before me- it'd be odd if she hadn't- so I can't see why you wouldn't mention it to your husband if you have a normal relationship.
Certainly don't jepardise your health faffing around with changing doctors.

It's worth phoning the secretary and explaining. They might be able to swap the appointment with another doctor if there are several in clinic that day. I'm a nurse specialist and have done this with another nurse colleague when I coukd see from my list that I knew someone. we literally swapped patients as we both had clinic at the same time.

Im a consultant and wouldn’t treat an ex-partner. I would arrange for one of my colleagues to take over care.

Contact their secretary and explain and they should be able to transfer you over to another consultant.

Caveat is unless this is a very niche specialty or you live somewhere very remote.

Chances are when he sees your name he will arrange for you to be seen by someone else anyway.

A chaperone would be present anyway for any kind of intimate examination

I don't think it's appropriate to have a clinician perform a procedure when you have sexual and romantic history. It might be acceptable if you were once neighbours or something but not this. You risk turning up and the whole thing becoming really embarrassing and the procedure not getting done. I think you would be wise to make contact beforehand to discuss your options.

Yeah you risk having it delayed if you don’t call and explain. Lots of my friends are medics at nearby hospitals and I asked them what the procedure is if one of our group of friends rocks up. They said they wouldn’t treat - transfer to a colleague.

It is better you ask for someone else sooner rather than later, as he may feel professionally embarrassed/unable to treat you when he realises it is you

He'll be in breach of GMC guidance if he goes ahead. So yes, best to rebook.

Exactly…..and I’m pretty sure he won’t won’t to go ahead

Just ring his secretary and say that given the nature of the appointment and the fact you know him personally (no further details required) you would like to reschedule with someone else.

Incidentially, I know my gynacolognist otherside of his working life but he's the best around so no way I was dealing with anyone else.

He may decline to go ahead ….as you and he have history….and that would be his right…..then you would be waiting even longer….just sort it joe

DH is a consultant and has had a few neighbours in his clinic as we live close by to the hospital. At least 4 in the last 2-3 yrs. He puts them on a colleague's list for procedures. Too close for comfort. Your ex may want to do the same.