I started work for the local council which is a very new role for me. I had zero experience to bring to the position. Lots of life experience in common sense though which I thought would see me through.
How wrong I was
I will try and keep this brief and to the main points but events that have happened over the last six months
Attack attacked in the street by somebody carrying a knife. Took 40 minutes for the armed police to arrive
This person will be sentenced this week and I think as a result of it is brought many feelings to the forefront of how exposed we were and how little support we’ve had since.
Within the team, there are two big strong men
Two other women Very physically unfit and incapable
Another physically unfit and incapable man
Myself and another young girl who in an emergency situation I think would fair second to the two huge blokes, But we would at least be of some use
If it wasn’t for the great deal of psychological trauma suffered by the young girl.
Every single shift, I am embracing myself for an onslaught of trauma dumping
This person is in their early 20s and I have never in my life known so much to happen to one person to the point where other team members are not sure that it’s actually true.
I choose to believe that it’s true
But combined with the incident that happened with the public, I’m getting to the point where my mental health is falling apart
I can’t afford to leave this job
I was off sick with a Work Related injury, so I’ve run out of Sick pay.
I kind of have to power this through, but I don’t know what more I can do to muster protection from management
Additionally, there is conflict in the team and I recorded some of this on my phone gave it to management and was told that it would not be viewed and that disciplinary action would be taken against me if I recorded it again
I’ve been forced to delete the footage
So effectively I have an email from the senior leadership team telling me that I am to destroy the evidence of a verbal attack against me
If this escalates any further and becomes physical, I feel like I should take this to the actual police
But I’m so stressed and upset my usual fairly good judgement is becoming more and more skewed by the day
Can anybody at least reassure me or give me any thoughts on how they would handle this?
Very much appreciated, thank you