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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Suspect friend lied about parent having cancer

106 replies

MelloYellow · 10/01/2026 20:16

Hello just wanting to get some opinions
im a 43 F who lost their DH to cancer.
I reconnected with an old friend and he’s lovely but a bit much - I’ve had to tell him about coming on too strong and he’s apologised.
He lives a few hours away and over Christmas he said he was coming to our home town in the new year,I wasn’t really feeling like meeting and then he told me his step mum had just been told she had cancer.He told me she had a lump ,and the consultant told her it was definitely cancer ,he had said he suspects stage 4,said about survival rates and her notes etc said cancer.
Fast forward to this week and suddenly she doesn’t have cancer ,they got it wrong .I suspect now it was said to get my attention.AIBU? Or Culf a consultant get it this wrong.Cancer is obviously very triggering for me.

OP posts:
MelloYellow · 10/01/2026 20:22

love the user name

yes exactly that.
Ive gone quiet and said how odd I find it and I’ve just received a text what did I mean by it being odd - I feels I think he’s making it up.
Im just not going to respond.

OP posts:
ohfourfoxache · 10/01/2026 20:19

I’m so sorry about your DH Sad

She may have found a lump, but there is NO WAY of knowing stage etc until investigations are done. Sorry, but I don’t believe this at all

sittingonabeach · 10/01/2026 20:19

Could he/stepmum have misinterpreted notes?

Mumteedum · 10/01/2026 20:19

I would back away. You're vulnerable. If you feel something is off, just don't get involved.

NormasArse · 10/01/2026 20:18

I know a lady who was told she had liver cancer, and it turned out not to be. I imagine that is rare though.

MelloYellow · 10/01/2026 20:17

*Could a consultant

OP posts: