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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask which school you'd choose?

36 replies

LittlePetitePsychopath · 10/01/2026 16:10

We're at an impasse, and I need to get the application in!

School 1 -
Very close to our house, probably a 5 minute walk.
Well-regarded locally.
Spacious and in good condition
Lots of additional features... it's own swimming pool, forest school, they have specialist teachers for IT, Spanish, art etc, even from reception.
They swim and do forest school once a week in every year.
Lots of decent afterschool clubs, although we wouldn't really need any.
A religious school, and about 60% of the school that attends are religious.

We do not massively follow the religion, but are very likely to get in anyway. One of us is concerned that the religious element might interfere with our son's love of science and logic, and affect his critical thinking skills. They also think the teacher seemed quite stern during a taster session.

School 2 -
About 25 minutes walk from our home.
Also very well-regarded locally; and the school I wanted to go to as a kid!
Great community links with the theatres, emergency services, etc
Lots less space - it's an old building in the centre of town - and less facilities as they get less funding. There's a smaller playground, especially for KS2. They do have access to a big paddock in good weather.
Not religious, and do lots of interesting trips and challenging the children. The yr6s gave us a great tour and then talked us through tracing back soldiers from WW2 who went to their school...
Each reception child has a yr6 buddy, which seems like a nice scheme. Our tourguides were super excited to introduce us to theirs.
The school prides itself on all staff knowing all children by name, which is nice.

He has four close friends... two are going to school 1, 1 is going to school 2, 1 is going to a private school.

Where would you choose?

OP posts:
Elizabethandfour · 10/01/2026 19:42

School 1 definitely.

Original poster
LittlePetitePsychopath · 10/01/2026 19:40

Yeah it’s Catholic. I’m baptised but don’t follow the religion, DH isn’t baptised at all. We’re well within the catchment of both, and both school offices have said we’d get a place, although I know there’s no guarantees. Barring a freak occurrence, though, it seems we’ll get into whichever we put first.

School 1 does still do science, they were doing space when we took DS to look around. He’s space obsessed. I have messaged them about how they approach science/evolution, but not yet had a reply.

It’s a brilliant school, the facilities are outstanding. He’s a really outdoor-y boy and I think swimming and forest school and more space suits him a lot, and he already speaks some Spanish so I love that they do that from reception. But the school does say that their faith runs “through everything”. For the most part that’s things like working with the local food bank, helping walk the local rescue dogs, etc, but they do attend masses every half term.

In looking that up, I’ve seen the new prospectus also says they do communion and confessionals from year three, and also pray before and after lunch, at the start and end of each day, in weekly prayer sessions and in special assemblies… that feels like a lot! Especially as they said only 60% of the school is currently catholic and they expect it to drop to circa 50% in September when the new children start.

We could make the longer journey to school work, but it’d mean DH can’t work full hours for a long time, so all earning requirements will continue to rest with me. It also feels like we’d be dragging then 1YO DD into town and back all week, as it’s two hours of walking each day. I’m not sure how we’d make it work when she does preschool, as that’s on a different site… there must be somewhere we can drop DS off, I suppose, but it’s a residential area without much room.

Thanks for all the opinions! I really thought I’d find this easier than I am.

OP posts:
Cosleepingadvice · 10/01/2026 19:29

Is the 25mins walk school genuinely 25mins walk? We chose a school that is a "20mins" walk away but actually at EYFS / KS1 pace, its more like 30-35mins - especially coming home at the end of the week! I wish we had picked a nearer school as its tiresome for me doing it 4x per day and in the rain this week has been utterly miserable.

user2848502016 · 10/01/2026 19:18

Probably 1 because of the distance, they’re a long time in primary and you will really appreciate the short journey time when the weather’s bad/you need to be somewhere after school etc.

I think you as parents will have more influence over your child’s attitude to religion than the school. I’m assuming it’s catholic and you’re catholic but not religious?

If it’s a completely different religion or not a state school I’d go for school 2

tunainatin · 10/01/2026 19:15

Sounds like 2 good options - I'd be tempted to go with the closer one just as being close the school is hugely convenient and they can walk there alone from a much younger age making everyone's life easier!

stichguru · 10/01/2026 19:10

School one unless you really strongly disagree with a lot of the fundamental beliefs of the religion.

Enko · 10/01/2026 19:02

NuffSaidSam · 10/01/2026 18:57

I'd go for school one, as long as:

It's a broadly palatable religion i.e. you can get on board with their main views.

It's a state school so they still have to follow the NC with regards to science etc.

I agree with this

arlequin · 10/01/2026 19:00

If you culturally identify with the religion then def go for school 1. It sounds great. Is it RC? If your kid isn’t from a remotely Catholic family then I’d go school 2.

NuffSaidSam · 10/01/2026 18:57

I'd go for school one, as long as:

It's a broadly palatable religion i.e. you can get on board with their main views.

It's a state school so they still have to follow the NC with regards to science etc.

OnePoisedLilacEagle · 10/01/2026 18:51

They both sound great and I don't see one having advantages over another.

I would ask school one about the science curriculum. How much is "God/Lord/Creator created the world" versus "science shows us how evolution works. Different religions believe these different things"? I would also want to know how much of the church teachings on social issues are in the curriculum?. Especially since you don't sound especially religious.

thatsmyhouse · 10/01/2026 16:38

They both sound lovely. If you're not going to be pressed for time in the mornings school 2, simply because of the religious element for me. On the other hand, does the very close school mean having lots of friends close at hand for reciprocal drop-offs/pick-ups/play-dates/playing out when older? Sorry, not much help!

The only thing is, if school 1 is your catchment school, could you end up missing out if you don't put it as a priority and end up not getting in at school 2 either? Then you could end up with neither. I can't remember exactly how it works as mine are older, but if that was a risk it would swing me to school 1. Otherwise, toss a coin!

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