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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have sent DCs friends home for this behaviour?

588 replies

VictorBaucherOrSomething · 10/01/2026 14:07

DD (11) had two friends for a sleepover last night. About 9pm I walked into the kitchen to find them playing some 'game' where one of them was trying to make the other two laugh when their mouths were full of water. The girls were holding soup bowls and spitting the water into them, except they were obviously missing the bowls and there was spat-out water on my kitchen floor. I asked them to stop and to clean up the mess they made.

When i returned to the kitchen they were still playing the game, with the manky water still on the floor so I asked them to stop again. I have a mirror in the kitchen and saw the two other girls rolling their eyes behind my back and trying not to snigger. At that point I told them it was time for them to go home, so I called their parents to collect them. One parent was pretty apologetic, the other was less than impressed and was pretty snippy with me.

DD still isn't speaking to me for sending her pals away but I was pissed off with the lack of respect from them. AIBU?

OP posts:
Gettingbysomehow · 10/01/2026 14:10

I would have sent them home too mostly for the eye rolling.

mamabeth · 10/01/2026 14:10

It's not so much the water, it's the lack of respect in your own home that's unacceptable.

Peonies12 · 10/01/2026 14:10

Overreaction- it was water not wasting food. Your DD will be embarrassed for sure; friendships are so important at that age

Overthebow · 10/01/2026 14:10

I don’t think I’d have sent them home for that. It sounds like a silly game but they can get silly at sleepovers and it wasn’t harming anyone. I would have made them clean it up then forget about it.

purpleme12 · 10/01/2026 14:10

Well I'd have told them off for the eye rolling (and the spit water on floor) but no I wouldn't have sent them home

Think that's a bit much for this particular situation

MrsPinkSky · 10/01/2026 14:09

Massive overreaction for goodness sake, how embarrassing for your daughter.

I expect she wasn't allowed to play with anything messy when she was younger too?

KylieKangaroo · 10/01/2026 14:09

I don't think I would have sent them home but everyone has different rules. The eye rolling is rude though so I'd probably just not invite them back for another sleepover instead of sending them home.

Favouritefruits · 10/01/2026 14:09

They were just having a bit of pre teen fun, they weren’t hurting anybody. As long as they wiped and cleaned everything after they had finished I’d have left them to it! Your DD must be so embarrassed and I doubt people will want to come to yours after this.

tilypu · 10/01/2026 14:09

It's just water. Would it really have been such a big ask to let them clean up once they were bored of it?

jeaux90 · 10/01/2026 14:09

JFC OP. You need to unclench.

Mischance · 10/01/2026 14:08

They should have stopped when you told them to and cleaned up.
I would have packed them off as you did.

OhNoSummer · 10/01/2026 14:08

I would have made them stop the game and clear up, but not sent them home.

I think you were a bit harsh OP. Sleepovers are a big deal at that age. If I were your DD I would have been mortified.

Haggisfish3 · 10/01/2026 14:07

I’d just let them play and then make them clean it up.