To have sent DCs friends home for this behaviour?

Yes pretty much this. As I’ve said in previous posts I wouldn’t have sent them home but I would have had private words later with dd about respect during sleepovers. My mum would have sent them home and can still remember how mortifying and embarrassing I found my mum on occasion as a kid as she was too stern and my friends would mock me for it.

Because of this I’ve always let my kids be very relaxed with friends here. I’ve never sent a kid home but there was one who wouldn’t respect my son’s toys and broke some. He was never invited back to the house again.

I dunno, depends how much water I saw i think. Depending on my mood id either join in or let it go on for a few times then said "uh girls can you spit it in the sink or summat before we all drown" and laughed a bit to lighten it, but then got DD to one side and said turn it in now, theres the mop!!

I wouldnt have completely overreacted and embarassed myself mainly, as well as everyone else, thats for sure!

Yes. I'm saying let the girls get on with it but I'd ask them to pop them in the dishwasher when they were done - which is our normal washing 🤷🏼‍♀️

I would have pulled your daughter to one side and told her to stop messing about and find something better to do and if she didn’t that this would be the last sleepover she had.
I have a boy the same age and do sleepovers a fair bit with anything up to 6 boys for birthdays etc
My son knows the rules before hand and my expectations, maybe it’s a difference in genders but my son and his mates wouldn’t be playing such a weird game. The sleepovers he attends and we do here tend to involve a board game ( they cracked out the monopoly and snacks last time) food, a kick about outside, in for gaming on their devices that they bring and then to bed about 10pm with no devices so they just chat quietly until they fall asleep.
Ive never had eye rolling when I’ve had to tell them that they sound like baby elephants or that I can hear them yelling when they’re engrossed in their gaming. I usually get cheeky sheepish grins and apologies.
You shouldn’t have sent the home but equally because of the attitudes I wouldn’t have had the stay again.

What a huge monumental totally humiliating for your daughter overreaction on your part OP.
When I was reading your op and got to 'game' as you put it, I was expecting it to be something AWFUL, not some preteens playing a perfectly harmless, silly and fun game.
You really really need to unclench.
Were you ever invited on sleepovers when you were young? Think back, what did you get up to? They are supposed to be, you know, FUN for goodness sake.

Not accepting 11 year olds ignoring you and then rolling their eyes at you doesn't make you hot headed?

They were asked once
They were asked again

All OP got was ignored and eye rolls in return.

Good for her for not standing for it and ending the sleepover early. Sleepovers aren't a right and they got a consequence for their rude behaviour.

@BunnyLake when you drink out of crockery, some of the liquid enters your mouth and exits again, thus getting “spit” on it exactly like this game. This is a daily occurrence for crockery and resolved through normal washing!

It’s not like they were hoiking balls of phlegm into her finest china.

Tbf I cant see there being a next time. No way would me and my friends have wanted to stay at op's house again. I'd be embarassed to see her again at being kicked out, embarassed for my friend at having a mum that overreacted like that, but also just wouldnt have wanted to be there, we'd all be paranoid if we were a bit silly again so it just wouldnt be fun.

Far easier and less chance of weirdness to just give that house a wide berth and if i was the parent of one of the girls id be disappointed she acted in a way to get kicked out but would also be a bit wtf over it and just find it a bit of an odd household so probably wouldnt let her stay again anyway.

poor DD though, I feel so sorry for her 😫

Sure the DC parents don’t want respectful children in their house or there daughter mixing with them.

My ‘children’ are grown up but if my grandchild had been told to stop, then I would expect them to stop.

I work with 11 year olds, so these thread replies don’t surprise me at all. Every single day I hear adults say how incredibly rude or disrespectful a child has been. The eye rolling defence by parents on here explains why.

This is a TikTok craze but it’s still disgusting spitting.

I haven’t forgotten.

Ther is absolutely no way my mother would have allowed anyone to do that and make a mess in her house.

I am far more laid back but would expect it stopped cleaned up when asked. Not eye rolling and rudeness.

The water is something I remember doing with my mates 😂I would have made them clean up, but I would have asked for an apology for the rudeness and eye rolling and been very blunt if one was not forthcoming. I do not think you were unreasonable. Why are so many children so rude to adults these days?

What was the parents response OP?

I think you totally overreacted op, I have 4 girls and have had many sleepover with them acting daft and playing silly games, it would never have occured to me to send anyone home for this. I've seen these videos all over tiktok and it's just a bit of fun, I feel quite sorry for your daughter.

People aren't saying it's acceptable necessarily, they're saying the OP has massively overreacted over what is basically a non-event.

Wait until she’s a teen. This is a game that’s played on a lot of social media. It’s just a bit of fun…

fun sponge 🤣

Scott Mills or another DJ used to do this in air. Op it would t have bothered me, I woukd have given them kitchen towel to clean up. In our house I would only be worried about a slip hazard

My parents also raised me with standards. I’m sure many of the posters on here were also raised with standards just like you were.

This doesn’t really have anything to do with how we all individually would have reacted in this situation.

What a strange and sanctimonious comment to have made.

The punishment didn't fit the crime.

The OP could've dealt with it without phoning the other parents and sending the kids home.

All the OP's DD has learned is to be embarrassed and nervous of her mum.

And if she does happen to find herself getting bullied over this once word goes round, her mother is the last person she's likely to turn to.

No, I'd have just got them to empty the bowls when they'd finished and put the dishes in the dishwasher.

That is the bit that I would have disapproved of, it’s pretty disgusting (obviously not to a kid). I wouldn’t have sent them home (I would never send a friend home if my child didn’t want them gone) but I would make clearer boundaries to my child if they wanted more sleepovers.

I wouldn’t trust their washing up, more of a dishwasher job.

In this specific instance I would have called my child to one side to speak privately and said it’s ok you play this game as long as it doesn’t get out of hand, but it’s your responsibility to get you and your friends to clear up properly afterwards. I definitely wouldn’t have sent the friends home for it.

Generally speaking, we had an understanding with our dc in place that they were in charge of making their guests very welcome but also stopping them when things started to go over the top. In other words, they had to set a good example and be reasonable if they wanted friends to be invited again,

You absolutly did the right thing, they were disrispectable of your home and rude to you,eye rolling. Id of told their parents exactly how rude they were, id be dam sure those parents wouldnt of tolerated that behaviour from your child in their home. Let your DC get on with sulking dont pander to her

Aww, your poor dd. Totally unnecessary over-reaction, op. So she has to go back to school on Monday and manage the friendships with two friends who were sent home from her sleepover for the sake of an eye roll and a kitchen floor that needed a wipe?

This. She's going to be the talk of the school. Likely not invited elsewhere too. ( I work in a school and have seen similar things)

Also to the 34% who think this kind of miserable behaviour is reasonable, what on earth? Do you have no memory of being 11, making new friends, having crazy fun?

Honestly, I think a lot of MN'ers have completely forgotten what it's like to be a kid doing goofy, stupid things.