To have sent DCs friends home for this behaviour?

Despite what other posts have said, this sounds like a pretty disgusting game to me. I would have nipped it in the bud straight away too and made them clean up. Well done for sending them home too. Rolling their eyes and sniggering shows a complete lack of respect. And as for the mother that was funny with you - shame she didn't bring up her daughter better. Probably why she behaved that way in the first place.

But they continued doing it after OP asked them to stop.

It’ll all blow over, including the snide comments. Lessons learnt from all sides.

I can imagine , a very tough few years OP I’m sure 😟
I’m glad to hear he’s coming out other side though 🤞.
That’s good that there doesn’t seem to be any repercussions for your dd since sleepover, & she is off to her friends this evening.😊

I’m sorry to hear that op. It must be very difficult.

You are in for a ride during the teenage years OP.

But the bullying is not your fathers fault, is it. Its bad behaviour of troubled children that should have been addressed.

The expectation of letting children behave badly because adults are afraid of the children being nasty to each other if we stop them is really worrying, especially as so many PPs on here seem to be in this camp.

We have a divorce going on due to domestic abuse and child abuse from my stbx.
I thought I could i could do no contact mediation with him to avoid courts. 3 years cohabitation and 2.5 years marriage. We have 3 year old daughter. He says I walk away with nothing. This aside. The mediation process has brought back all the pains from abuse and stress I had when I was with him. I feel awful. I can't take it. Am I being unreasonable to stop mediation and just go to court?

It’s a bit gross but they weren’t causing damage. It was disrespectful not to stop when you asked though. I wouldn’t have sent them home

Not being mutually exclusive was the point I was making.

It's not even a new game
It's been around years
It's just popular atm

Couldn’t you have just put a big towel down ? They were just having a bit of fun.

Ofcourse they’re not kidding.

My DD and her friends bake together and make a huge mess whilst doing so. They have so much fun, so who cares about the mess. Once they finish and cakes are in the oven they clean-up.

I leave them to it. I’m pretty sure OPs guests and DD would have tried up the floor once the game was over.

Sleepovers are supposed to be fun.

They're really not mutually exclusive - there's a time and place for everything.
OP was being a killjoy at a kids' sleepover - social suicide for her children.
All the other mummies know now.

Treats are part ‘n’ parcel at a sleepover - nothing to do with good behaviour. And the kids weren’t misbehaving, they were playing a messy game. Instead of speaking their thoughts to OPs unnecessary request to stop, they eye-rolled to each other. They didn’t realise they could be seen.

OP has embarrassed her child by sending her friends home over this. Hopefully her friends will sympathise with her having such a strict parent, rather than come away from her entirely. I would find this hard to forgive if OP had been my mother.

Viewer discretion advised for the following video which contains children playing with water

Oh come on! It was just water and a fun game between friends.

You totally overreacted and have completely embarrassed your DD. What on earth were you thinking? I’m not surprised she’s not talking to you.

I don't have a spoilt brat - my child is a well-rounded high-achieving adult.
Playing silly games is all part of a happy childhood.

Did you never play bobbing apples?
Water gets everywhere with saliva from kids' and adults' mouths as they try to bite the apples in a basin - the stuff of nightmares for people like you.

Absolutely.

So, a brisk, 'I think this is all getting a bit silly and messy now so pop these bowls in the sink and use these towels to mop up please.'

And, 'I can see you think I'm being a grumpy and spoiling your fun but I am not up for anyone slipping and hurting themselves and I think this is a game for the summer when we can play it outside.'

Then, 'if you can tidy that all up and make it safe and clean please - while you're doing that I'll sort some snacks and then maybe you could grab your duvets and get settled in front of the TV and we could sort out a film for you.'

None of that is permissive but it does allow the playdate to continue without awkwardness.

Like I said, when they're 16 and you're worried about drink, drugs, self harming and sex, a mild eye roll behind your back will seem like the good old days.

I have lovely teens, who behave well and our house is respected and their friends are welcome and seem very comfortable to come round. They may well roll their eyes at me behind my back but I don't know and don't really care. They're not my friends and what they think of me is of v little consequence to my life. I don't necessarily like them all but I would still rather they came here and I get to put faces to names and see the lie of the land, than being so strict and intolerant that my dc go elsewhere and I know nothing and have no influence.

But presumably you expect your DC’s friends to treat you and your home with respect?

I doubt the OP will be back.

I'm faaaaaaaaaaar from a permissive parent 🤣 if I got told my kids did something wrong, I'd believe it, usually telling them off unless I found evidence of innocence. Letting your kids have childish fun for as long as possible is not going to turn them into sociopaths, talk about exaggeration.