DH to pay off mortgage then stop house bill contributions

Many of these arguments would equally apply to a pregnant woman giving up work. What if the roof leaks, what about pensions, is it fair for the man not to have takeaways anymore? On this basis every woman having a baby should immediately go back to full time work.
Their arrangement is they pay 50:50 and if he’s still paying his fair share and as a sahp is supporting her to work by doing his share childcare and chores then what’s the problem?

I think if I knew him to be capable of getting any job paying about £30 k after his fun year was up, that the sabbatical year would be used fruitfully, that much of the domestic load would be taken off me and that he'd be careful financially, I'd be happy with that. If his track record indicated that he's prone to laziness, lacks motivation without structure, has a wondering eye, and will end up sitting on the sofa in front of the TV all day, I'd be very concerned.

I think you also need to look ahead to when you are 68 and able to retire on your SP. Your DH will be 75 by then and one or other of you might not be in the best of health. Talk with your DH now about retirement plans, projected income, where you want to live (downsizing?), how you ideally would like to spend your retirement years and what provisions you can make now to ensure you are as future-proofed as you can be.

You can talk to PensionWise (google them) for free and they will offer guidance and advice around retirement and pensions. You may see a way to enabling your DH's year off without compromising the pension that could make the difference between the 2 of you having a comfortable old age vs one of hardship.

A spouse doesn’t automatically own any part of a pension. On divorce, a pension can be shared but it’s not automatically 50%, it depends on the wider financial picture. On death, pensions don’t automatically go to a spouse either; they’re paid to the nominated beneficiary or decided by the trustees if no nomination exists.

At the end of the day he's trying to have his cake and eat it too. If he wanted to retire early at 55 he should have got married in his 20s, had his kids by the time he was in his early 30s so they'd be all grown up and moving out around now, so the couple could consider downsizing. He also could have squirreled money away when younger so he had a decent pension available at 55 that paid enough for him to live on.

He didn't do any of this though. He chose to have his footloose and fancy free years in his 20s and 30s, spending what he earned, saving the minimum, then married someone younger than him and had DC later in life. He can't have an easy early retirement now, there's too many expenses left to pay, due to his lifestyle choices.

Exactly, unless he dies or you divorce and it's awarded as part of the settlement, his pension is his.

A few years ago if you reached your max lifetime pension allowance and an employer insisted on continuing to pay into your pension despite this, then it cost you money - more money than they had put in. So you were better off with no pension contribution.

You might recall lots of doctors refused to work because of this and they changed the rule.

I'm not sure that's technically true. If they divorced then their pensions would be taken into account when dividing the assets, but whilst they're married I don't believe OP has any legal say over her DH's pension. They each 'own' their own pensions. They don't have shared finances either.

You do. If you were to divorce, half his pension belongs to you and half of yours belongs to him.

Half his pension isn’t “hers”. I don’t own half my bloke’s pension and have no claim on it until he’s dead.

The lump sum has been taken from his pension. They each own 50% of each other's pensions. So 50% of that sum is hers. In addition, a lump sum doesn't come out of nowhere, it reduces the amount of pension paid. And since half that pension was hers, he's reduced her retirement income for the rest of her life!

Good questions. I'd also look now at whether he could stay with his current employer but in a role other than the active service he's been doing, on a part time basis.

Erm... maybe him unilaterally deciding to stop work and leave the OP with increased expenses, all the mental load of finding money to juggle expenses and still having to do the morning school run because he CBA???

You need to read the thread. He is planning to take early retirement and live off a meagre pension. He won't have money to save into another pension. For this to happen it would have to come out of OPs salary. If she had this money spare then, since she has a rubbish pension herself, she should put it into her pension, not his. He is in the situation he's in because he's choosing not to work. No way should OP be going without even more than she already would be, just to pay into another pension for him.

£900 of the household bills. But that’s it.

Presumably treats and luxuries (holidays, DC school trips, emergency household repairs etc) they currently pay jointly from both of their remaining income. He isn’t going to have any income anymore!

I think it’s a lot more complex that most posters are assuming……. It’s not just case of “he pays the mortgage, she pays the bills, he does all the household chores”.

lets say he becomes a SAHD, steps up doing the lions share, they cancel wrap around care and he does school runs so they save a bit more money.

what happens in a year? what if he decides he wants a job sooner, do they need to try and find childcare places again?

let’s say he decides he likes being a SAHD, is OP expected to pay all the bills infinitum? Or just up to the point their final mortgage payment would have been? If the latter, will her DH get a job then?

the above also only considers “bills” what about luxuries like trips out, family holidays? what about emergencies like car or boiler repairs? Will that all fall to OP?

it’s something they need to sit down and work out together, not something that can be unilaterally decided by her DH.

He’s essentially paid £900 per month in advance . So he has paid his share upfront . What is the problem

Sounds like you’re jealous as he’s retiring and you’re not. He’s older than you and he deserves / needs a break. He’s paying off the mortgage , so just give him a break
No he doesn’t need to do more of the house work either as one PP unkindly suggested

Pharmaceutical research. It was DB and she'd reached the maximum benefit (I think it was 30/60ths and she'd been there 30 years) and she could take it at 55 so she got a part time job (dog walking!) for the exercise, even though she could have lived off savings then took the index linked pension at 55

And of course, if you've paid off your mortgage your expenses are less

I would ask him, what happens about paying for unexpected items

Examples
Washing machine breaks, you need to buy a new one, who pays ?

Family holiday, who pays ?

Emergency dental treatment, who pays ?

He’s not stopping his contribution, he’s paying it in advance. How many months of mortgage is he covering?

Because he’s not paying anything else! No money for other bills, food etc 🤦🏻‍♀️

That's very odd.
Why would her occupational pension not increase if she worked till 65?
Doesn't make sense.

I wonder what work she did?

Just pool your money, a paid off mortgage benefits everyone.

Can't get on board with married couples "contributing" certain amounts tbh, wouldn't want to live like that personally.

I have had time off for babies and studying so I couldn't get worked up by this - it's all swings and roundabouts in the end

If he is having a year off work.

He should take on more of the household chores

Each person should check their own
You may need to pay extra if some of the years are not full

https://www.gov.uk/check-national-insurance-record