Nursery teachers snarky comment

I would say, 'I have a commitment until 6pm and can't guarantee to be able to arrive any sooner than 6.20pm. If this isn't convenient for your team (following 2 phone calls and everyone waiting by the door with coats on, waiting to leave, on Friday 9th Jan), I am more than happy to switch to Wednesday (or whichever day). However, the same time will apply due to my work schedule.'

Depersonalise it. They don't need to know you're at home studying.

The manager doesn't seem to have very effective management skills. If there was a fire alarm or safe guarding issue at 6.25 does she just lock the door and leave it. Why didn't she send a certain number worker's home early and alternate it week on week for such issues on Fridays if the child worker ratio is covered ?! I'd keep my head held high and kindly remind her she allocated you Fridays for benefit of service not service user and as a result if its impacting her or child then she find a solution for a different day that suits your college needs. Don't bend over back wards for her, most childcare workers have the childs best interest/needs at heart but in her case she's running it as a business and that is unlikely to change based on her personality. I'd ask about for any childminders who may provide a more homely environment so it gives you a back up should more similar situations arise .

That brings back memories of when I was a young single parent with a child in nursery. I had a good job in the city which I had worked hard to get. The nursery constantly made me feel guilty about leaving DS in nursery. They’d say he missed me and I should get a good job locally in Tesco like lots of the other mums. They didn’t appreciate I’d fought homelessness and drug addiction to get this job and provide a good life for my DS. It was like they were always trying to jeopardise things for us.

I suggest you read it again a few times and maybe practice your reading comprehension…

Agree completely.

As an employer I pay my staff to the end of their working day. If we get our tasks finished slightly early I might let them head away slightly early with my permission.

if for a second I got wind of my staff pressuring or coercing a “client” ( I’m in a different line of work) so that they can get away a bit early I would be raising merry hell. If I found out it was a regular occurrence I would be docking wages.

totally out of line. Unprofessional and reflects badly on my business.

Errr - working past 6 on Friday is completely normal.

How is this helpful? Mum is clearly struggling and it’s two days. Your comment is so judgmental and doesn’t even address the actual issue.

I’ve only read your replies OP - and well done btw for defending yourself. Hate when people are hounded off their threads by trolls sticking the boot in - it’s destroying mumsnet tbh. Nothing wrong with nursery - my daughter loves it - and it’s brilliant you’re studying and working and being a mother. As you say, your daughter will remember that and be proud and inspired. I was by my full time working mum.

I am a single full time working mother with full time nursery. I get the slight guilt when she’s the last to be picked up. But just wanted to share an experience because I really do think it’s so crap of them to have made it so obvious to your daughter - she could have been really distressed by all that fuss. Mine was the last in her room recently and they sent me a picture of them giving her a ‘spa day’. She had her feet in warm water and they did her hair while she had her milk. It was so cute of them. Their reaction to having just her was to be able to give her extra attention and care that they couldn’t usually with lots of children - not to moan that they didn’t get to knock off early!!

Well I can’t believe that you can’t believe anyone could be at work until six on a Friday!

Honestly until this thread I had no idea people expected to knock off work early on Fridays. In my experience people tend to work longer on a Friday because they’re trying to get things finished so they can have a free weekend. I finished at seven yesterday.

The op is paying for the session until 6.30pm and is entitled to use it. I don't see the relevance of your snark.

FWIW I usually work beyond 6.30pm on a Friday.

You could ask for a meeting with the manager to reach a common understanding of the service agreement. You could present not as making a fuss, but as taking their feedback/needs seriously. And in the meeting firm up their time requirement and how to meet your child’s needs.

edited to say I’ve not read the whole thread

Haven't rtft but I work in a nursery. This absolutely is an issue between staff and management and I think you have to address it. It could be they were taking the piss or it could be they usually are gone by 6 as a casual agreement and management didn't clarify that they need to stay late. As you probably know, 2 staff need to be on the premises at all times even if there is only one child left. To be honest I wouldn't mind sitting near the door with the coat on, it takes a few mins to get a child ready and they probably have to mop and clean the room before leaving so one person probably stayed with DD while someone else cleaned. I also wouldn't take issue with a 'we want to go home' comment if it was friendly. I would however take a big issue with ringing you twice implying you were late, and the tone of the comments. Personally I'd ring rather than email and have a chat to the manager.

@constantnc

you do know OP also needs sleep too right?

If dd is asleep at 7 get up and work while she sleeps, then take her to nursery.

@Cantfindafreeusername

quite right! OP needs to quit her degree and stay home. Who does she think she is…trying to better herself!? Doesn’t she know she’s a mum now so no longer a person, she only exists in relation to her child now.

They are out of order.

DC went 7.30 to 6ish three days a week. I worked in a different city.

Some of the replies here are unbelievable. We had no other support. I never felt guilty.

I remember once the nursery calling me to collect my oldest because they wanted to close. There was no snow but it was expected. They knew we worked 20 miles away. Left work and got there as soon as I could, including getting a taxi from the station. Nursery manager asked to speak to me a few days later. They said I needed to be considerate of the staff in the nursery. I said that was their job. I wouldn't want anyone unsafe or unable to get home. There was no snow or ice, it was only expected. My commute time would not change and this would not work if I was expected to arrive earlier. I became self employed when DC started school.

Nursery staff were very unprofessional to call and be waiting with hats and coats on.

She was working until she needed to set off and arrived at the nursery at 6.20. Unhelpful and unkind comment. You don’t have to believe anything anyone says. You also don’t have to be so judgemental and unkind.

@N4ish

they agreed to the hours and were actually pushing OP for a Friday. So if they aren’t ‘on board’ now, it is tough shit quite frankly.

She did arrive 10 minutes early though and the nursery had already called her twice so how long had she been sat ready to leave? Would she have been sat ready at 6 had the poster arrived then? If a nursery closes at 6:30 but wants parents to arrive 10 minutes before closure so thebstaff can get away at 6:30 then they should state that nursery pick up is 6:20 at the latest not 6:30 and stop charging parents at 6:20 instead issuing a fine if the parent is late.

I agree but I’d also have to briefly mention that Friday was offered due to it being quieter.

I know you’ve said Thursday would be better for you, but just in case nursery suggests Monday avoid it as you might end up paying for Bank Holidays and no provision.

OP ignore the absolute nonsense on here. I used to be astonished that my two DDs were always the last to be picked up at 5.50 when the nursery closed at 6. At £10+ per hour, who on earth is paying for hours they don’t use? It is ridiculous that some people are acting as if your study is somehow less important than a full time job, or that it’s somehow your problem that the nursery staff don’t want to work the hours they offered you. The nursery business model nowadays seems to be insisting everyone pay for very long days that they don’t expect most people to use - ridiculous.

as for “long days”, there is increasing evidence that a bit of structured preschool childcare a week is good for children, especially 2+. It’s also the case that girls who see their mums have careers are more likely to have careers themselves.

Honestly, I think sometimes women are their own worst enemy. We should support each other!

Just say 'I think there was a bit of confusion on Friday. It seemed as if the nursery was shutting early? As I had two missed calls (at X time) from staff saying they 'wanted to go home'. My daughter's hours finish at 6.30 on Fridays don't they? Same as the other days? If you could just clarify that would be great.'

I'm sure she doesn't give a flying fig about her dad's important finance career either which sounds like takes up far more time than the whole 2 days of nursery OP uses for her studies.

Do you judge him too?