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AIBU?

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To have spent most of the day in tears over trees

311 replies

NoMoreTrees · 09/01/2026 16:56

We moved into this house just shy of a year ago and I regretted it almost instantly. I absolutely hate it here, it has pretty much ruined my life and for the last few months my mental health has been in tatters and I’ve had some very, very dark days.

One thing I did like about the house though was that at the end of the garden, on the other side of the fence were some beautiful tall trees. Dozens of trees with hundreds of birds that you can hear singing all year round, an owl, squirrels and other wildlife. The trees ran the entire length of our row of houses and a bit further.

On the other side of the trees is a small field, and while we were having surveys etc done they brought up a planning application for a small development of 9 houses in that field, which had been rejected by the water company.

Well I’m sure you know where this is going… obviously the water company were offered more money changed their minds because before the sun was even up this morning a bunch of men in hi viz and hard hats rocked up with a chainsaw, a bulldozer and a woodchipper and one by one started tearing all the trees down. By the time they had downed tools and fucked off there was only one tree left standing at the end of our garden and one or two surviving further down… for now at least.

I just can’t stop crying. I can’t even bring myself to look out of the windows at the back of the house. All those beautiful trees, all those birds, all that wildlife, gone. It was one of the very, very few things that made living here tolerable, and now instead of trees and birdsong, there is going to be a building site. Just when I thought I couldn’t fucking hate it here more.

To have spent most of the day in tears over trees
To have spent most of the day in tears over trees
To have spent most of the day in tears over trees
OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
5MinuteArgument · 12/01/2026 16:16

KeepPumping · 12/01/2026 15:35

Hopefully the local ,people win.

Thanks, I really hope so. It saddens me that any green space is disappearing.

KeepPumping · 12/01/2026 15:35

5MinuteArgument · 09/01/2026 22:03

I hope you're right. But I see many green spaces where I currently go walking being earmarked for development. The local people are fighting it.

Hopefully the local ,people win.

TonTonMacoute · 12/01/2026 11:02

Lots of pretty trees you can plant around the edges of your own garden, that will grow quickly. Elder is a very good choice, also look at silver birch, rowan and liquidambar, which has beautiful coloured leaves, and perhaps pittosporum, spindle and hazel.

I would never, ever plant another conifer in my garden and I have a huge garden. I think the poster who has been planting her Christmas trees in her garden is in for a nasty (and expensive) shock in another few years!

Do not on any account take the advice of the utter twat who suggested planting Japanese knotweed, I think you could possibly be prosecuted for that.

OhDear111 · 11/01/2026 18:22

The op probably has not stopped to think of trees were felled to build her house! It’s easy to check landscaping proposals for a new estate and, as others have said, op can plant trees. Beech hedges are fantastic but I’d put in small native trees too. I’d not lose sleep over conifers being felled!

Disturbia81 · 11/01/2026 17:56

I alwaya cry when trees get cut down. So many people either love the bare look or something trimmed to a little tiny neat thing.

MIAMNER · 11/01/2026 09:10

I would be devastated too but you have a big, beautiful garden that has so much potential and turning into a wildlife haven could be just the thing to brighten your MH and help you feel more positive about your home.

I’d start by planting a native hedge all around the perimeter. Winter is the perfect time and you can find cheap bare roots at https://shop.woodlandtrust.org.uk/?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21562090235&gbraid=0AAAAAodncPfDXoJ2iy--FicYPuhLeTTS9&gclid=EAIaIQobChMImrzbmJCDkgMV4JNQBh0QzCedEAAYASABEgIyJvD_BwE

I planted a corner native dogwood a few years ago, it looks beautiful and absolutely sings with wildlife. Finding cheap ways to garden is a really fun challenge and was the one activity I could do when my kids were really little. Come join us on the gardening board!

Woodland Trust Shop | Woodland Trust Shop

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ParmaVioletTea · 11/01/2026 08:39

wombat1a · 10/01/2026 11:06

Those were conifers, in a lot of ways having them gone is a good thing. Hopefully its a case of they will be replaced with trees that are native and will promote the local environment.

Conifers = tree weed where I come from.

Indeed. And they tend to stop natural diversity, as they dominate and take up nutrients more aggressively. It’s why tree crops, for paper and building timber etc, are conifers.

Your photos show a large garden, @NoMoreTrees so make it a project to plan and plant a variety of trees, according to the light, soil, and aspect.

Theres a gardening section on MN I think? Ask there, there’ll be loads of good advice.

But I suspect your sadness is only projected onto the loss of someone else’s trees. It might be worth reflecting on where it’s really coming from.

Makingmusicinmy50s · 10/01/2026 20:32

NoMoreTrees · 09/01/2026 23:39

Would an elderflower tree work? It’s a north east facing garden… I’ve always loved elderflower trees. My old neighbours had a beautiful Japanese maple which I thought was gorgeous, and another neighbour had an allotment with a Red Devil apple tree that she got the most wonderful apples from. But I do want trees that will encourage the wildlife to come back… butterflies would be lovely too. My lovely MIL is quite green fingered so might consult her tomorrow

I'm so sorry you are going through this OP.

I had a similar experience. I moved into my house 20 years ago, after being mesmerised at the 'mini woodland' in the neighbour's garden behind me. My garden was the most private and pretty garden because of it.

I moved in in November, and one day the following March, I woke up one morning to the sound of chainsaws. I looked out of my window to see every tree had been cut down. Then the building works for a few months culminated in the neighbours extension butting right up to my garden fence. That was a very sad time. Lesson learnt to never move to a house based on other peoples trees/ greenery.

I also had an elderflower tree in my north east facing garden. It thrived for about 40 odd years (planted at least 20 years before I moved in), until it got diseased so badly that it was at risk of falling onto the neighbours extension. It was a huge beautiful monster of a tree, scaling the rooftops of the back neighbours roof (I'm near to the corner of the road so this neighbours house goes sideways at the bottom of my garden). I had it felled 4 weeks ago and am still very very upset about the loss of the most important thing in my garden, the loss of the birds singing and seeing the squirrels running up and down it all day. My cats sit looking at the empty space too. And the house which looks like a box with windows staring at me when I look out is just awful.

Elderflower trees do well in a north east facing garden. Mine was just unlucky. A previous poster said you would be littered with pink bird poo and that is right. I couldn't use that area for sitting or drying washing for that very reason. Pink and purple bird poo everywhere! I had in effect, a 5 meter square area that I couldn't use. But I didn't care because that tree was a fine specimen.

I'm planning on planting a massive banana plant in the space the spring (I hear they can reach 5 meters in one season). Some jasmine and honeysuckle scaling the fence will bring a bit of colour to that corner as well.

There's a company called Instant Hedges and they can and do provide mature trees. Not cheap but very impressive what they can achieve.

It's rubbish OP.

I feel your loss.

wombat1a · 10/01/2026 11:06

Those were conifers, in a lot of ways having them gone is a good thing. Hopefully its a case of they will be replaced with trees that are native and will promote the local environment.

Conifers = tree weed where I come from.

santasbaubles · 10/01/2026 10:56

I’m so sorry, I would be heartbroken by this too. Can you afford to plant trees on your side of the fence? I know it’s not the same but in time they will grow and be a home for birds.

KeyItIn · 10/01/2026 10:37

The is a dramatic change and I’m not suprised you are sad about it but I think it’s something you will find you get used to. I know it wasn’t just conifers but most the trees that were directly behind your house were and they aren’t the nicest trees and the things about trees is that you can plant them and they will grow!
We moved into a house with a big garden and a lot of ugly trees including conifers, we spent a lot of money chopping them down. We went from having an entirely private garden to being able to see other houses. It didn’t look great but we were playing the long game and now our garden is full of beautiful, interesting, native trees that provide much better habitats for wildlife. If I were you I’d look to plant something at the end of the garden. Even if you can only afford something small it will grow.
The other thing that you should try and see as a positive is that the houses being build are being built far from your house. The gardens are quite long. Once everything is finished you won’t feel on top of them and once the houses are built then you don’t have to worry about something worse being built there like high rise flats or a factory or something.

KeyItIn · 10/01/2026 10:37

The is a dramatic change and I’m not suprised you are sad about it but I think it’s something you will find you get used to. I know it wasn’t just conifers but most the trees that were directly behind your house were and they aren’t the nicest trees and the things about trees is that you can plant them and they will grow!
We moved into a house with a big garden and a lot of ugly trees including conifers, we spent a lot of money chopping them down. We went from having an entirely private garden to being able to see other houses. It didn’t look great but we were playing the long game and now our garden is full of beautiful, interesting, native trees that provide much better habitats for wildlife. If I were you I’d look to plant something at the end of the garden. Even if you can only afford something small it will grow.
The other thing that you should try and see as a positive is that the houses being build are being built far from your house. The gardens are quite long. Once everything is finished you won’t feel on top of them and once the houses are built then you don’t have to worry about something worse being built there like high rise flats or a factory or something.

FigurativelyDying · 10/01/2026 10:34

I am devastated for you, OP. Would it be possible for you to harness your own devastation and turn it into determination to grow your own garden, with trees that screen you from the new development? You’ve had such good suggestions from others about what to grow. Together, we can turn your garden into a new haven for wildlife. Your children will surely enjoy helping you garden too.
Oh, and definitely go and ask the house behind to adjust the angle of their spotlight

APC303 · 10/01/2026 09:31

NoMoreTrees · 09/01/2026 23:20

As I’ve said- more than once now- they haven’t only cut down conifers and I’m not only sad about the conifers

One of the aerial photographs you posted appears to show a near continuous block of Leyland's. If there's individual trees of different species within that group, leaving them whilst removing the Leyland's would probably have left them rather exposed and not realistic to keep.

Have you looked through the planning documents and found the things titled along the lines of Tree Survey/Arboricultural Impact Assessment/Tree Protection Plan/Arb Method Statement? There will/should be some helpful info in there, particularly the schedule of trees.

Is there a landscape plan for the site? (There should be). Any new tree planting behind yours? It looks like will be a private garden but that doesn't stop trees/hedges being planted.

APC303 · 10/01/2026 09:21

Looks like a block of mostly Leyland cypress. It would be unusual for trees like that to be a constraint to development.

bittertwisted · 10/01/2026 09:14

I was all ready to think you just had January blues, but that is an abomination!
Those were beautiful trees, and made your garden really private
I completely empathise

UncannyFanny · 10/01/2026 09:13

OhDear111 · 10/01/2026 08:22

@ToastersandkettlesAre you for real? You see badgers and foxes all the time because there’s too many of them now! Foxes are everywhere! Neither are prey and as if building really causes overpopulation! It’s no hunting that’s caused too many foxes. I live near HS2. If you want to see real destruction of the countryside - come here. Still see healthy foxes and badgers all the time and the multiplying deer populations destroying trees. Not to mention squirrels taking eggs and red kites eating anything small that moves!

My experience living in an urban area people feeding the foxes like idiots leads to overpopulation in concentrated areas but as you say neither foxes, badgers or deer have any natural predators anyway so they are already out of control. .

cantthink123 · 10/01/2026 08:40

Oh my gosh no YANBU... I'm so sorry poor you that's awful 😢😢😢

OhDear111 · 10/01/2026 08:22

@ToastersandkettlesAre you for real? You see badgers and foxes all the time because there’s too many of them now! Foxes are everywhere! Neither are prey and as if building really causes overpopulation! It’s no hunting that’s caused too many foxes. I live near HS2. If you want to see real destruction of the countryside - come here. Still see healthy foxes and badgers all the time and the multiplying deer populations destroying trees. Not to mention squirrels taking eggs and red kites eating anything small that moves!

rwalker · 10/01/2026 08:20

Plant your own leylandii

dippy567 · 10/01/2026 08:17

Tbh, if its leylandaii that have bern cutting, they suck nutrients out ifvthe ground and aren't particularly attractive. More sun in spring/summer. Plant your own row of fast growing or semi mature native trees and wildlife will bounce back.

Development proposed doesn't look bad - and backing onto decent size garden so separation distances ok. People need homes to live in and you knew it was on the cards before you bought?

Id try and stop moaning and see the positives tbh.

Inthebleakmidwinter1 · 10/01/2026 08:12

You need a felling licence to fell trees in the uk. You can check on the forestry commission website if they have one.

piscofrisco · 10/01/2026 08:09

Fuckers. I’m sorry for you op. I know what it is to have yo live somewhere you hate. For some people it eats away at them (I am one). When I had this I did my very best to make the house as nice as possible inside. So that at least when I shut the door I liked what I saw. It didn’t make me feel at peace but it did help a tiny bit. Hard to find the motivation to even do it however when you hate where you live. They were lovely trees :(

Andepeda · 10/01/2026 08:03

UncannyFanny · 10/01/2026 07:53

And the songbirds whose eggs and chicks are regularly killed by grey squirrels? Do you care about those to?

Yes.

Toastersandkettles · 10/01/2026 07:59

I would be devastated OP, and make plans to move ASAP. I live in an area that is being destroyed due to thousands of new build homes being built. It breaks my heart every time I see the trees and bushes being ripped out. There are hedgehogs, foxes and badgers squashed all over the roads because they have nowhere to go. Rightmove is full of these ugly boxes and nearly all of them are sitting there heavily reduced.

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