Would you inform the school?

They probably relate to her in some way, it’s like having a mirror held up and it sets people on the defensive. Very telling. Glad your friend is reporting it.

You’re right. It should be reported. Whether it was in the workplace or not, it’s very telling of her character and your concerns are absolutely valid.

I couldn’t agree more with this. Your approach to it is all wrong, and seems underhand.

If your post was “should my friend go to the police about woman who spat on her?” Most people would say yes.
But because you’re making it all about her being a teacher and wanting to inform her employer, you lost a lot of people’s support.

I also am dying to know what the argument was about, and what your friends role in it was.

The women is a women who has done something unacceptable and grim which is considered a criminal offence.

You need to seperate out your obsession with the fact she is a teacher, as this aspect of it seems more important to you than anything else.

If you and your friend would have reported her regardless of her career choice then fine carry on as you are, but if you are excessively penalising her because of her job, and hoping that you can get her the disproportiante punishment of loss of job/career (and everything that goes with that - loss of home etc) I think you and your friend have other issues. I'd love to know what the dispute was about who started it and the dynamic of the other 'witnesses' present.

What was the context? Did the teacher just approach your faultless friend ?
was or is a teacher?

If the spitter was the teacher then I’d want a lot more information first as it’s potentially more explosive - school might be compelled to investigate, teacher might lose their job, you might get labelled as a troublemaker. It’s not going to just sit in a file somewhere should the need for family context ever arise, it’s potentially far more damaging in itself.

Relevant context in relation to the child for safeguarding I’d’ve thought? If the mum presents as happy families but the child is disruptive and seems troubled then this behaviour from the mum would be very helpful to explain things are not what they seem. It’s not like she randomly shouted at someone or had had a few drinks in her own time - spitting is disgusting and to me very much crosses a line.

But there is no evidence it happened and the friend doesn't want to take it further which suggests it perhaps didn't happen like that.

The OP has avoided the Q several timea if theyor anyone else actually saw it happen.

So you weren't there

And this was apparently 2 friends having an escalating argument. Where no doubt unsavoury things were said on both sides

The spitting is gross but often friends argue, one acts badly but the other doesn't want to report it because they know they pushed them and they're friends

Which I suspect is the case here

She lost her shit & behaved appallingly in a difficult & escalating situation.

OUTSIDE of work & with no bearing on her work as a teacher.

To join the chorus of other women who witnessed this & scapegoat her & tell her employer is fucking deplorable & shit stirring. She may well talk to her colleagues/HT herself without a coven dobbing her in it.
AND/OR apologise to your friend for her behaviour, but not if you lot all decide to tell her workplace first & make matters so much worse.

91% yabu...

You sound very on your high horse about how shes a teacher. And you know her, so it seems very personal.

Instead of focusing on the facts of what happened. Which is surely whats important.

Anyhoo, you say your friend is reporting it to the police now.

So no need for you to be involved further really.

Edited for typo

It jist seems you may have added the witnesses to give credence to your story, after a load of posters said youve only got your friend's side of the story...

yes to the police no to the school, I think schools have enough reports from parents who contsantly think the schools needs to know every single thing that ever happens in the world I am surprised they have time to teach these days

I think most think it is not your role to do so as someone who wasn’t there and who would be giving a second hand account.

if your friend wants to then that is her choice and one she has every right to make

Just read the full thread , glad your friend is going to the police.

You should get your friend to report the incident to the police not the school. It is assault. If this is all true it is disgusting behaviour on the part of the teacher and I wouldn’t want her teaching my child . FWIW I’m a teacher too.

Well if you are concerned about an assualt you report it to the police not her employer as you would your self employed hairdresser or you unemployed uncle. Once the police are involved then your teacher friend will be abliged to inform her employer and professional body.

Or alternativly you stay out of it and allow the friend who was spat on to decide how they wish to proceed.

Well you do sound happy your friends going to the police! You and she do realise they’ll take a statement from the woman you your friend is accusing of assault?