To be fed up of bossy two year old

I have never personally had to deal with this personality type but if I came across it I wouldn't be indulging it. It continues because you think it's cute for some reason.

If she’s got enough language ability to assert herself and boss her mother about, she’s got the capacity hear some stern words in low level age-appropriate way. “No Maisie, mummy has to do something else now, you’ll have to play with teddy now instead….” (Said with serious face and ignore wingeing or foot stomping).

Yes, the child is acting within ‘developmentally normal’ behaviour, but all children’s cheeky boundary pushing is. When do you start with discipline? When they’re 5? 10? 15? 25?

This weird hipster advice that children are too young to understand simple parental disapproval is what is actually ‘wrongheaded’ and so harmful when you see the statistics about child mental health. Children need calm loving adults to be in charge, and being in charge means the odd low-stakes telling off when children overstep or become unruly. It’s actually good parenting.

They have good taste 😁

But it is also confusing that you posted saying my two year olds bossy behaviour is really getting on my nerves and when people have said about ways to manage it, you have then said you don't mind doing it and even answered your own question of when will it end in another post by saying it will end when this stage ends, so maybe this wasn't an AIBU post and maybe just a chat instead looking for empathy/any one that can relate.

Mumsnetters are wild.

I could start a thread now detailing horrific child negligence from a neighbour and we’d have posters saying I shouldn’t judge or ask why I haven’t helped them, yet you dare say your toddler is bossy and you’re failing as a parent and you’re enabling your DD to become a antisocial burden on society.

The greatest quote I have ever seen regarding toddlers was simply - “toddlers. What the fuck?”

Quite right! It’s wearing, but completely developmentally appropriate. They’ve just figured out that they’re a separate person and can impose their will on the world around them. Being a tiny tyrant at 2 means precisely fuck all in terms of future character. People just love to dump on mothers for the sake of it.

She’s 2 teach her she can’t just push and pull anyone. Say no or ouch. If she persists firm tone, eye contact, you do not push mummy. I’d be zero tolerance for pushing or pulling, nip it in the bud.

Sorry, no help as I have mid to late teens but that did make me laugh- loved that book!

Two year olds are sharper than you think!

I used to tell mine I’d been to the doctor and had my ears changed, so I couldn’t hear whinging or shouty voices 😆 if they wanted a favourable response from me they had to use manners.

It gets better!

In my experience bossy toddlers leave you questioning if they’re natural born leaders or natural born psychopaths.
My eldest DC aren’t bossy at all. Youngest (also 2) looks at me like Im auditioning for her approval on dragons den and mostly, shes out.

I get my mini-dictator to 'try again asking nicely'.

I mind less when she says 'please can you sit there'.

Bit of a losing battle though as she orders around my 6ft husband and son who meekly obey.

The dog completely ignores her though, so that's a leveller. The fury is sometimes palpable, I'm not sure how he has the nerve.

Give her as many choices as you can throughout the day so she fills up her ‘control bucket’. But not so much that it overspills and she gets power hungry.

Also is she an only child? Only asking as neither of mine were like this and wonder if it's maybe because they had a sibling to boss around/another child who isn't always going to say yes.
I do notice my friends daughter who is an only child has always been bossy to her mum, and when younger if we went to the park for example she would soon get annoyed with my kids if they refused to play the game she wanted (even if they had already played her game and then wanted to do something else) and she would turn to her mum to either tell mine to play her game or to get her mum to play as well or instead.

This made me properly LOL OP because I can totally relate with our son. He's having a phase of wanting us to sit and watch him play cars but we're not allowed to join in. Also telling me off! If it's something I want him to do I ask him to ask nicely. If it's something I don't want him to do I try to divert him. I do like to play along because it can be quite fun and we don't get much time in the evenings after work and nursery. Like we spent a good half an hour hiding behind the curtain tonight pretending it was a den.

@BeingATwatItsABingThing I’ve raised 4 toddlers none of them like this. And minded lots, have seen the older side of this style of parenting & it’s not cute when they are older

Even toddlers need boundaries

I agree to go along with it if she is playing a game but I also agree to set boundaries and begin to encourage her to see how others want to play too. If she continues bossing friends around when she gets to school then she will soon find they won't want to play with her.
I also agree with comments telling her no you aren't available to do whatever it is she demands.

In my experience children start caring about others around your daughters age and a gentle 'no not now, I'm busy/doing my shopping/you'll have to wait" is a push in the right direction.

I'm sure you know best @beingbossedabout.