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Original poster

To be fed up of bossy two year old

132 replies

beingbossedabout · 07/01/2026 18:15

Will probably regret starting this thread as toddler threads here often go mental but my two year olds bossy behaviour is really getting on my nerves. It started with just being ordered to ‘sit there mummy’ and it’s evolved to dragging me around, taking a finger and pulling me, trying to shove me down on the sofa if I need to get up, and getting very irate when I don’t do as I am told, it’s tedious as hell. When does it end?

OP posts:
NCJD · 08/01/2026 14:42

Oh god DS2 was called ‘sergeant major’ at this age for his attempts at bossing people around. ‘PAPPI SIT THERE!!’ was frequently bellowed at my step dad who was his favourite play mate!

He grew out of it (and he’s not even that much beyond 2) 🙂 I’m not really sure we did much in the way of boundaries around this behaviour beyond rolling our ours and saying ‘NO YOU SIT THERE DS2’

Garroty · 08/01/2026 14:32

Screamingabdabz · 07/01/2026 21:22

No. I didn’t ‘misspeak’.

‘Respectfully saying no’ can be modulated according to age, context and misdemeanour from serious face sing-songy when they’re two, stern words and tone when they’re older to full bollocking when they come in unexpectedly drunk at 16 on cheap cider and puke on the carpet.

It’s all ‘telling off’ to your child. It lets them know you’re in charge and you’ll not put up with nonsense.

There is no magical ‘developmental’ milestone when you can start. It’s all about setting expectations and communicating disapproval in the most effective age-appropriate way along the road.

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Ok well if you think firmly saying no to a two year old is telling them off you will just have to accept that your personal definition of the term is out of step with the majority understanding and therefore will cause people who don't share your esoteric definition to misunderstand you.

HeyThereDelila · 08/01/2026 05:55

Just tell her no.

it’s fine if you’re playing a game, but toddlers have to learn about the way the world works and that includes them learning they’re not in charge.

Toddlertiredp · 08/01/2026 04:15

Very much relate, thankfully mine likes bossing the cat around just now so takes the edge off me. Although the tantrums when the cat buggers off out the cat flap after being told to do whatever are exhausting!

canklesmctacotits · 08/01/2026 03:17

Toddlers are basically underdeveloped psychopaths trying out various techniques on their long-suffering parents. It’s a good thing they’re cute (especially when asleep) because frankly no sane person would bother.

FunnyOrca · 08/01/2026 03:10

beingbossedabout · 07/01/2026 20:27

MN is really peculiar about toddlers, there’s no other word for it. Obviously you get some sensible posts but for the most part they are assumed to have reasoning, logic and motive way way beyond their years.

Yeah, people are crazy.

As you know, it’s developmentally appropriate and she is showing signs of secure attachment to you.

It’s a developmental stage to attempt to “root” adults and carry out play around them, with the secure knowledge of where they are.

It will get better (for you) as her theory of mind develops. She doesn’t even know she’s bossy. Her thoughts are the only ones she is aware of.

Tourmalines · 08/01/2026 02:37

CandlelitKitchen · 07/01/2026 21:19

The apple hasn't fallen far from the tree.

Yep . Lol

ActiveTiger · 08/01/2026 02:09

Erm then be a parent and stop the behaviour. Our youngest girls twins are 2 next a 3 and none do this..mummy ain't jumping everytime, I will play with them once I've got my jobs done they know that but nope only bossy one allowed is me lol 😂

RescueMeFromThisSilliness · 08/01/2026 00:27

beingbossedabout · 07/01/2026 20:44

I know how to manage it. I’m not seeking advice and I certainly don’t need MN making inferences about my parenting or about my child.

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What was the purpose of your thread then? I'm slightly baffled.

Carycach4 · 08/01/2026 00:05

What seems funny and cute now, will be seen as obnoxious in a couple of years in a reception classroom. You need to remind your child that you are the mummy!

takealettermsjones · 07/01/2026 23:52

DysmalRadius · 07/01/2026 23:20

When my little dictator was about 3, a friend we had saying gently suggested that he probably shouldn't throw his boomerang in the kitchen as it was more of a park toy.

He looked friend dead in the eye and bellowed 'Mummy, Jon said he'd take me to the park!' and just put his shoes on and waited with an expectant expression while my poor bewildered friend looked at me like he'd been absolutely had (which he had, tbf).

Toddlers cannot really conceive of others having feelings or experiences different from their own - it's just something they learn as they begin to see others as people in their own right!

Your son sounds wonderful 🤩🤣

PfizerFan · 07/01/2026 23:37

Just today, husband running her bath:

"Bath with mummy. Daddy OUT the bathroom. Daddy get milk!"

PfizerFan · 07/01/2026 23:33

I've got a 2 year old. Very bossy too! I hear ya!

TheBirdintheCave · 07/01/2026 23:33

This will sound stupid but I’m quite looking forward to this 😅 My daughter (19mths) seems to be developing into a ‘typical’ toddler with tantrums, leading me over to stuff and wanting lots of attention. By contrast my son at that age was very placid, totally content to play alone and didn’t want cuddles or to be held much. I felt a lot like a spare part 😂

DysmalRadius · 07/01/2026 23:20

When my little dictator was about 3, a friend we had saying gently suggested that he probably shouldn't throw his boomerang in the kitchen as it was more of a park toy.

He looked friend dead in the eye and bellowed 'Mummy, Jon said he'd take me to the park!' and just put his shoes on and waited with an expectant expression while my poor bewildered friend looked at me like he'd been absolutely had (which he had, tbf).

Toddlers cannot really conceive of others having feelings or experiences different from their own - it's just something they learn as they begin to see others as people in their own right!

Esthai · 07/01/2026 23:09

Mine manages to get experienced nursery room leaders to follow her assertive requests. She just issues them so calmly, and reasonably, with total expectation that she'll be obeyed...

I'd like to think she is modelling my parenting to others... 😂

Christmascaketime · 07/01/2026 22:45

I really don’t see point of your post. You say you are fed up of being pushed and pulled but in next breath don’t want to do anything about it. When she’s 3 at nursery and pushing other children it won’t seem cute.
Teaching little ones not to push and pull other people is parenting, how else do they learn what’s acceptable.

RobertaFirmino · 07/01/2026 21:57

If she remains like and starts to order her nursery/school pals about then she'll soon get a reputation as a 'bossy boots' and nobody will want to play with her. The best favour you can do her is to say a big fat no and remain stern and steadfast.

nomas · 07/01/2026 21:36

beingbossedabout · 07/01/2026 21:31

So no one’s claimed it’s because she has no boundaries and unruly toddlers are the scourge of society? Have another look.

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No, no one said she has no boundaries. What people said is you need to set boundaries.

Why are you offended by that? It’s a parenting forum!

And no one said toddlers are a scourge.

Carlou · 07/01/2026 21:34

um.. who is the parent and who is the child? Does the word "no" mean much? Keeping calm thru a toddler tantrum is better then being controlled by a 2 yr old.

outerspacepotato · 07/01/2026 21:32

No.

Original poster
beingbossedabout · 07/01/2026 21:31

nomas · 07/01/2026 21:25

Who bitched about your parenting?

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So no one’s claimed it’s because she has no boundaries and unruly toddlers are the scourge of society? Have another look.

OP posts:
nomas · 07/01/2026 21:25

beingbossedabout · 07/01/2026 21:23

I’m not interested in people bitching about my parenting or being unpleasant about a two year old, that’s right.

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Who bitched about your parenting?

Original poster
beingbossedabout · 07/01/2026 21:23

nomas · 07/01/2026 21:20

What is even the point of this thread? You clearly are not interested in other people’s views.

Edited
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I’m not interested in people bitching about my parenting or being unpleasant about a two year old, that’s right.

OP posts:
ThatCleverBird · 07/01/2026 21:22

It's funny because this is probably how either you've behaved towards him and he's copying or he's seen others treated this way