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AIBU?

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Original poster

To dob in family member - benefits

564 replies

Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:16

I have a relative that does have health problems. They went to tribunal and were awarded higher rate PIP and have a motorbility car apparently supported by a Rottweiler of an advocate. I have no gripe that they deserve something - occasional falls, mild mental health problems, physical health problems that require monitoring and support and mild difficulties dressing themselves due to joint problems but don’t actually need to be helped. They do have a disability.

However, they are able to walk miles most of the time, decorate their home, complete domestic tasks and attend social activities on a very regular basis on foot. Morally torn. They probably will struggle without the money. Would DWP even do anything kind of thing. Either way I feel a bad person.

OP posts:
UserFront242 · 06/01/2026 23:53

Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:52

No, like I say see them regularly. Know how life is lived. They walk far and wide on a regular basis. Occasional falls maybe a few times a year. No mobility aids. Live a pretty normal life. Life is not restricted by mobility.

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Then dob them in. But let them know it was you.

Original poster
Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:52

Penelope23145 · 06/01/2026 23:48

I think you've had a hard time here op. You say your relative walks miles but they receive enhanced rate mobility which is based on not reliably being able to walk 20m or having severe psychological distress when out. Could there be a side to them you aren't seeing or their condition is variable and you are only seeing them walk miles on a good day. The criteria need to apply on the majority of days to qualify for the points.

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No, like I say see them regularly. Know how life is lived. They walk far and wide on a regular basis. Occasional falls maybe a few times a year. No mobility aids. Live a pretty normal life. Life is not restricted by mobility.

OP posts:
Livelovebehappy · 06/01/2026 23:51

Go for it. You’ll get a disproportionate amount of people on MN though who like to turn a blind eye to benefit fraud, so probably not the best place to get a balanced opinion on it.

bert3400 · 06/01/2026 23:51

My X husband was on disability benefits for years (20+) ...he was unemployed, then suddenly got a back condition and was classified as disabled. He got the highest rate of benefits. He fooled everyone. In 20+ years he decorated our adult sons houses numerous times, up ladders, full decorating...never outside the house As he approached retirement age he made a miraculous recovery...fit a a fucking fiddle. I would never ever begrudge a genuine claimant but don't be fooled...some people know how to work the system 🤔

ilovesooty · 06/01/2026 23:50

I always wonder whether people like you are prepared to tell their relatives to their faces that they think they're receiving unfair benefits and they are thinking of reporting them.

Interpink · 06/01/2026 23:48

There’s some weird shit on here tonight including another thread about a child with a disability and someone questioning whether he is actually disabled, having had a leg amputated.

Penelope23145 · 06/01/2026 23:48

Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:45

No I don’t enjoy perfect health and am perfectly content that the benefits system is there to help people who need it. I am happy to pay tax to facilitate this.

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I think you've had a hard time here op. You say your relative walks miles but they receive enhanced rate mobility which is based on not reliably being able to walk 20m or having severe psychological distress when out. Could there be a side to them you aren't seeing or their condition is variable and you are only seeing them walk miles on a good day. The criteria need to apply on the majority of days to qualify for the points.

Nsky62 · 06/01/2026 23:47

The likes of me, could be judged too, I have good/ bad days with Parkinson’s at 63, mid stage.
i have leg issues and on my right side, I tremor too, some days more than others, I ‘know it’s degenerative, and will get worse.
Despite what I do or don’t do

silverwrath · 06/01/2026 23:46

Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:19

Haven’t a clue. They do have health problems as I say, just the award doesn’t feel proportionate to the problems they encounter.

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'the award doesn’t feel proportionate to the problems they encounter.'

Oh aren't you just a peach. 🙄

Interpink · 06/01/2026 23:46

Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:45

No I don’t enjoy perfect health and am perfectly content that the benefits system is there to help people who need it. I am happy to pay tax to facilitate this.

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But you’re the alternative judge of “who needs it”? Riiight.

I realise now why there used to be such a big turn out at public executions. It was people like you.

Original poster
Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:45

FreyasCats · 06/01/2026 23:41

I presume you enjoy perfect health and an iron cast income from salary in a job that will never be under threat?

Life can change in an instant for all of us. If you knew just how hard it is to get PIP you might not be so sanctimonious.

Have you seen the medical evidence with your own eyes? For all you know they're furniture walking to the loo or the kitchen or sitting on the bedroom floor sobbing with pain in the middle of the night.

Keep your anger for the dodgy politicians, tech bros and other grifters who are the real villains...

No I don’t enjoy perfect health and am perfectly content that the benefits system is there to help people who need it. I am happy to pay tax to facilitate this.

OP posts:
bigboykitty · 06/01/2026 23:45

Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:19

Haven’t a clue. They do have health problems as I say, just the award doesn’t feel proportionate to the problems they encounter.

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So based on your 'feelings', you're going to 'dob them in'? How utterly grim.

Interpink · 06/01/2026 23:44

Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:40

Well, that seems to be fairly unanimous. I am being unreasonable to even contemplate it. I knew this thread was harsh. I do have related knowledge and do know what I’m talking about. No I’m not jealous. I’m quite happy with my life and standard of living thankyou. It’s about fairness. Hopefully I can now wonder off and put it out of my mind. Ta

Oh you didn’t know what they’d presented at tribunal earlier.

And you’re so happy with your standard of living that you take a keen interest in the affluence of others? Why not go back to college and use some of that massive big brain to get further qualifications and a better paid job, and then you won’t care at all.

dottiedodah · 06/01/2026 23:44

I think these threads are unpleasant and leave a bad taste in the mouth. How can you be judge and jury for a relation FFS. Leave them alone and be grateful you are able bodied

Original poster
Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:43

Thanks. I am not angry. Possibly a little sanctimonious though! I do know the ins and outs and I do know the process.

OP posts:
TheSalvadorsStickbymebaby · 06/01/2026 23:41

Most of these types of threads run in the same vein,jealousy,spite,hatred and what it boils down to is 'look what they're getting that I'm not'.

Pyew · 06/01/2026 23:41

Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:26

Nothing. Probably a load of guilt if anything came of it. More an issue of remaining silent and I suppose social duty. Have sat on it for years. No I don’t think they should never go out but higher rate is for people with major mobility problems which impact their daily life which they simply don’t have.

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Yeah that's not the criteria for higher rate.

You talk about social duty. Your social duty is to be a respectful and engaged citizen, to support those close to you with care and compassion, and to do what you can to make the world a nicer place. Hole and corner meddling conducted from a position of spite and ignorance is very far from that.

FreyasCats · 06/01/2026 23:41

I presume you enjoy perfect health and an iron cast income from salary in a job that will never be under threat?

Life can change in an instant for all of us. If you knew just how hard it is to get PIP you might not be so sanctimonious.

Have you seen the medical evidence with your own eyes? For all you know they're furniture walking to the loo or the kitchen or sitting on the bedroom floor sobbing with pain in the middle of the night.

Keep your anger for the dodgy politicians, tech bros and other grifters who are the real villains...

Original poster
Dragonsfoot · 06/01/2026 23:40

Well, that seems to be fairly unanimous. I am being unreasonable to even contemplate it. I knew this thread was harsh. I do have related knowledge and do know what I’m talking about. No I’m not jealous. I’m quite happy with my life and standard of living thankyou. It’s about fairness. Hopefully I can now wonder off and put it out of my mind. Ta

OP posts:
Swissmeringue · 06/01/2026 23:39

I'm in genuine disbelief, this is a member of your family? YABVU.

Tbh even if they were genuinely taking the piss I'd think you were being unreasonable to dob them in, but it sounds like they aren't, you just personally don't feel they are "disabled enough".

Ohthatsabitshit · 06/01/2026 23:37

It’s a criteria you have to achieve. You get a certain number of point in each section and then the sum in the mobility section has to be above a threshold to get the highest rate. Once you are awarded the highest rate you then can apply for a mobility car and they take the benefit in exchange (plus a hefty downpayment in many cases). If your relative fits the criteria he or she can get the benefit and use it to rent a car. They can work or not as can you.

CantBreathe90 · 06/01/2026 23:34

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Scohpahni · 06/01/2026 23:33

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Copperoliverbear · 06/01/2026 23:33

Mind your own business

Jaspering · 06/01/2026 23:32

I wouldn’t tell my family everything about my health because they’re nosey and interfering. I don’t see how you could know about their difficulties really. The system is unfair but what benefit would there be to you reporting one person? Really you come across as a bit jealous.