To not understand how people have an evening.

What time are you up in the morning? And what time do you leave? Can you not do some jobs then? Lunches are done in the morning here, always have been.

It sounds like the dishwasher is actually making more work for you. We don't have a dishwasher and generally cleared up after dinner in 15 minutes maybe 30 minutes if lots of extra pans that need pre rinsing.

I also do washing in the morning so it has a chance to go on the line if weather allows , yes even this time of year I even bring it in when it's dark.

Youre choosing to sit n watch an 8 yr old eat dinner rather than go n chill

3 and 5 year old here. One of us does bath jammies and stories (we take turns) while the other does the running about prepping for the next day and after dinner tidy. We then take a child each (again alternating each night) and take them to bed. Everything is done before they do down. By half 8 we’re done.

I’ve always wondered this - particularly now my kids are adults and I seem to have even less time in the evenings. Reading this it’s because dh and I rarely finish work before 7pm.

Why not wait till the weekend to do all those 'chores'

It seems to me like you're doing stuff every night that doesn't necessarily need doing every night? I mean each to their own I suppose. But there's no way I'd hoover the whole house every day!? Life's way to short for that. We do most of our laundry over the weekend. But I do understand that very much depends on jobs and stuff. My wife works from home and I work in a warehouse style building so clean/different clothes every day isn't necessary. As for the the other stuff you mentioned. I just do those as fast as humanly possible lol.
I finish work at half 4, DW anytime between 5 and 7 depending on the evening. I get home and sort the dishwasher out, clean anything from the day. That takes about 20 mins. Then a quick shower. Then start with dinner stuff. Cooking eating and cleaning that away, maybe 1.5 hours tops, depending on the meal. After we've all eaten DD pretty much entertains herself for the evening, she's nearly 10. So we have from about 7pm until we decide to go to bed. We tell her it's bedtime around quarter to 9. She gets herself ready for bed. We don't stay up late but unless we do something out of the ordinary we normally get at least 2.5/3 hours to do what we want.

Me too, takes literally 3 minutes & its a kitchen/diner so not small. would be there all day if I swept it.

I just put the nonstick pans in the dishwasher 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

They go on top shelf in a cooler wash.

Sounds like your slow at doing chores, it shouldnt take all evening to do that.

Ah there was a small battle to be had! Love your username btw! 😅😂

Wait... you're hoovering the house...but sweeping the floor if the kitchen???

Hoover the kitchen (that's what we do!)

I don’t do any of that in the evenings and I’m on my own usually until about 7/8pm. I tend to do it around after school and dinner time. Whilst I’m making dinner I prep their lunch boxes for the next day and my husbands. I eat dinner with the kids and then while they finish (slow eaters takes about half hour) I clean the kitchen do the dishwasher and tidy up the toys and quick hoover round. I do a deep clean on a Monday when I’m off work when I worked Mondays I would do it Sundays then everyday I do the basics which don’t take long (I’m a clean freak😂). Then we are upstairs for playing whilst I run the bath, read books and bed. They are in bed most nights by 7pm. Then I’ve got the evening with my husband to do whatever. They are 8&4 obviously this wouldn’t work with your 12 year old but if they sort themselves out then that helps.

An hour???

Jeez.

Just don't do the whole house every time.

Do upstairs once a week.

Downstairs, zoom round every day/other day.

Edges etc once a week or something.

That sounds insane to me OP - we eat at 530 - by 630 the kids are done - shower, reading, extra homework etc. both down by 830pm I have 11 and 9 year old - we maybe unload dishwasher and Hang clothes out - then we watch tv till about 11pm or do whatever it is we need/want (maybe admin, maybe read)- sometimes later, bed by 1230am and up by 645am.

My daughter is away at uni and we still don't have an evening! Last night I got in from work at 8 30, made and ate a quick dinner (soup), called my elderly Mum and did a few on line things for her, washed up, did some personal admin, sent a few work emails and it was after 11. Made a drink and went to bed.

Admittedly I'm usually home by 7.30 but trains were delayed but even so I fill that time.

DH works too, his evenings are full of chores as well.

We've generally eaten by 6 pm, and the dishwasher is loaded, after my son's packed lunch has been made. My son is 15, so sorts himself out for bed in the evening (with some yelling up the stairs for him to hurry up and get in the shower!). My husband and I usually sit down by 7 pm at the very latest. I then empty the dishwasher once it's finished around 9.30 pm. Are you eating quite late in the evening? When are your children doing their homework? Are you helping with that, before dinner is prepared/cooked? My son does his homework once home from school - changes our of his uniform, and then has a drink/snack before starting.

What time are you getting home? That makes a massive difference.

As others have said you seem to be taking an extraordinary amount of time on things.

Generally speaking our evenings are ours once the DC are in bed by 8-8.30.

All this ‘getting the 8 year old into bed’ what is that? I send mine up with instructions to brush their teeth and put pjs on. I follow up and read to them but we’re talking 20 mins max start.

Also, mine are totally involved in the clear up after dinner, we’re all loading the dishwasher, they are putting condiments away etc. Then they can leave the kitchen. They are also responsible for tidying up after themselves generally, yes sometimes I have to ask twice but I’m not their skivvy, if they’ve used it/eaten it they clear away.

They have school dinners too but on the weekend they make their own lunch, could you get yours doing that day to day? Make it part of the kitchen clear up.

So, do you hoover every single day, top to bottom? I have a weekly cleaner - 7bed house, 5 bathrooms+ensuite. She doesn’t do ground floor (kitchen utility wc lounge and dinning room) as we keep on top of those on a day to day basis… but we have lazy messy teenagers who wreck their bathrooms every week and use the floor as a wardrobe - she does 2.5hrs most weeks. I hoover the lounge/kitchen every day as we have moulting spaniels, so I also put the hoover over the hall/landing once a week between my cleaner’s visits. I dust quickly when I notice it needs doing (again once a week, as cleaner does it once). We wash up/clean the kitchen as we go, have two dishwashers that are emptied as needed not on a rota. My DH is often not home until 730 and heads to bed around 930 as he is up again at 530. We have 2hours minimum quality couple time - watching a movie/netflix, reading/listening to music and chatting, every night. I do 5-10 wash loads a week and about 8hrs of ironing a fortnight, walk the dogs for an hour a day… I could go on. The house is pristine (DH is a bit OCD, we are an ND family) and our evenings sacred.

I don’t understand how anyone can be spending hours every night washing/cleaning/sorting laundry and hoovering.

Can you tell I love it 😂😂😂😂

You know, I nearly posted the exact same post last night as I am in the same boat and so fed up. We do have a routine but by the time elest is in bed 8:30/9pm. I am ready for bed or I fall asleep while finding something on netflix. My eldest is 9 so 9 years of it now. Im so jealous of people who have their partner to help them too, DH works away Mon- Fri.

I sometimes find that people with the most available time take the longest to do things!

So why does OP do these things? Ok the cleaner might be unaffordable but the other things aren’t costly. For example, we don’t ever wash up - we only buy stuff that can go in the dishwasher and we cook simple things for ourselves in the week. Last night we had an omelette and the night before we had a curry from the slow cooker. very few things even for the dishwasher.

If I don’t have a wfh day I do laundry in evenings and weekends. Takes me 5 mins to put it on then when it comes out of the dryer I sit and fold it in front of the tv.

Anyway OP, I appear to be busy/chaotic/time poor as well as I usually sit down myself around 11pm with an orange, a decaf and a bit of telly.
I work full time from home and am a lone parent to a 16 yo.
However, the bit between work finishing and 11pm isn't just running around, there might be sport (either/both me and DS) and showers.