Are female friendship groups worth the hassle?

OP, you've either chosen the wrong friends or they were the right friends for the moment which has now passed and it's time to move on.

Don't blame women for this.

There is no drama here. I couldn’t tell you who likes what photos in a group chat and if someone doesn’t reply they’re probably busy or preoccupied.

I agree with pp, that it’s the same we the school gate drama, if there’s often a problem then maybe you’re the problem?

Four and a half hours later and the OP never came back.
She obviously found us not worth the hassle.

These made up, provocative OPs often written by AI are ruining MN.

You are the common denominator.

I wonder if the difference is how you formed?

I have a group of friends from secondary school, so we all met at the same point, some difference in who was most friends with who etc but generally it's fairly even. Same with a group from Uni. Some of us see more of others than others do, but it's all swings and roundabouts. we're also geographically split so don't SEE each other altogether often although we're all active on messenger. I think if we all loved in the same area and saw everyone weekly there would be much more chance of fall out. we've consistent chosen to make an effort to maintain a friendship over 30 years as well so gaps, silences etc., they mean nothing in the fullness of time. if someone can't come, well there will be a other time etc.

I wonder if the difference is how you formed?

I have a group of friends from secondary school, so we all met at the same point, some difference in who was most friends with who etc but generally it's fairly even. Same with a group from Uni. Some of us see more of others than others do, but it's all swings and roundabouts. we're also geographically split so don't SEE each other altogether often although we're all active on messenger. I think if we all loved in the same area and saw everyone weekly there would be much more chance of fall out. we've consistent chosen to make an effort to maintain a friendship over 30 years as well so gaps, silences etc., they mean nothing in the fullness of time. if someone can't come, well there will be a other time etc.

No, this is your own internalised misogyny showing. I have spent the last six months in a workplace in which I was the only woman. I enjoyed it, but the idea that men are less garrulous and less gossippy than women was really not borne out by my experience.

Women are bitchy, especially when in big groups. 30’s are probably peak time for this

It's exactly the same with school playgrounds and school gate drama.
People who complain about bitchiness and drama ARE the drama.

Everyone else just gets on with things 😂

Men and women / boys and girls are socialised differently and women are socialised more to conform which can make it tricky if you don’t fit in so well ; they are also socialised to talk more - gossip more - and care about appearance more and all that can lead to bitchiness and judging being more common

I have multiple female friendship groups dating in some cases back to the early 90s, and no 'drama' whatsoever. I don't recognise the behaviours you describe.

I'd be checking your internalised misogyny, OP, and finding better friends.

This has not been my experience with female friends (althoughI have friends of both sexes). Sounds like you need to find yourself some better ones, OP.

I have a few friendship groups and don’t have those issues with them. No drama or angst. I think your friends sound like very hard work. It shouldn’t be like that.

My female friend groups are not like this!

So one person took you aside and, on the basis of that, you no longer had anything more to do with the group again? @ManyPigeons

and you describe a member of the group as a woman who had spent our late teen years talking shit about me and being nasty to me with her mates so forgive me for not giving a shit.

No part of your post is what i regard as anything remotely resembling my group of girlfriends

I’m still friends with them but find it annoying and misogynistic

lovely

Sorry but I agree with OP. Women are bitchy, especially when in big groups. 30’s are probably peak time for this. And like someone else said smaller groups often form. Having said that as I’ve gotten older my friendships with fellow females have become a lot more supportive and less competitive. And there is a big difference between having a supportive group of friends that have been together for 25 years where there is distance and only meet a few times a year, than a group who all live close by and see and socialise with each other regularly. There are many more opportunities for misunderstandings then. In addition I have a couple of friends whose female friendships revolve around their husbands friends wives more than their actual own friends. I’m still friends with them but find it annoying and misogynistic

I’ve never had that, you need to be more careful when choosing friends

Most larger friendship groups are unstable. Maybe 4 is the maximum.

Smaller groups form within the larger group and people get excluded. In a larger group there are always going to be people who like each other less and more and form sub groups within the main group.

The only real way large groups stay together is when all the people in the group don't really care about keeping it together that much and are very relaxed about their interaction with each other.

I haven’t fallen out with a female friend since my first term in Uni when we had a seriously oddball flatmate who didn’t like it when me and our other flatmate didn’t tolerate her trouble making behaviour. Ever since then I’ve had female friendships which are extremely caring and meaningful

But no, this isn’t Gossip Girl it’s real life and women IME very really bring drama or fall out. Don’t fall for the (usually wrong) sexist notion that women are bitchy

Haven't experienced anything like that since I was 16 to be honest.

Call it whatever, we’re generally a happy group with lots of love 🥰

That’s just bitching by people who won’t admit it’s bitching

More like… sharing “minor observations!”