DUMB SHIT People say

I have a common for my age first name think Debbie or Claire with a really bland surname like smith. A person a few years above me
had the same first name but with a slightly different spelling (eg debby or Clare) and a very different surname like Patel - we looked nothing alike, she was tall dark
and beautiful and I was ugly pale, freckled and ginger - in my first year of secondary school a teacher upon hearing my first name asked me if we were related.

It wasn’t hurtful like some other examples posted but it made 11 year old me stop and wonder why we let these people be in charge of children. It was the most pointlessly dumb thing I’ve heard someone say to me.

It was a tad insensitive but probs meant as an encouragement. Some people don't make the effort because they feel they don't look good either way, so in that situation it would've been a good comment.

I got the same comments with my b/g twins.
Also, whenever I shopped in Waitrose the same woman from the deli counter would always accost me to start preaching about the benefits of breastfeeding. There was never any variation in her dialogue.
Got to the stage where I started quoting her lines back to her. Don't think she realised, but seemed most impressed. 😁

I was telling a colleague about my horrendous experience of being stuck in a lift. She asked, "Eeh, did you manage to get out?" 😖

I'm a femme lesbian with a femme wife, so 'you don't look gay' is a classic for us.

Once people find out we have a toddler, then come the questions about sperm donors, and how we chose the 'dad'. Last week someone even asked 'if you don't mind me asking, how did you conceive.' Well actually, I do mind! And how do you think??? It wasn't immaculate conception hun. Everyone knows what IVF is.

I’ve posted on here about this before.
Ex boss, asked me in front of other staff;

“Tell me is there something in here (pointing to my stomach)? Are you pregnant? “

Me: “No , im not pregnant “

“Are you sure?”

“No, I’m not pregnant, I’m sure”

“Really , you’re sure you’re not pregnant?”

(A little taken aback now! )”No, it must be these trousers, I’ve got a belly” 😕

Jesus Christ woman . Shut up!

I used to get this a lot. I really pissed me off. (It doesn't happen now that I'm a pensioner, though I'm occasionally asked whether I have grandchildren. It's not meant unkindly, but it hurts.)

I was home from uni in the early '80s. I was taking a degree in Russian at Glasgow.

A family friend was visiting. "Ah, Weary! I saw an ad - they're looking for someone who can speak some Russian for a small part in a film - to play a Russian woman. I thought you could maybe apply for it - you know some Russian and you're big-made, so you could pass for a Russian!"

Gee, thanks! (Yes, I'd gained weight.)

The film was Local Hero. When those of us in the Russian Dept went to see it, a roar went up: the "Russian woman" was played by one of our lecturers - Tanya Ticktin - very slim and blonde (and nowt like the family friend's idea of a Russian).

Not really sanctamonus to have empathy but if you feel it is perhaps career that requires empathy and being able to understand the changes are experiencing isn't for you!

Amazing that you did all that straight after giving birth! Maybe he thought you looked way too good to have just given birth?

😂

At work: “You’re a really good people person, you’re great with people blah de blah blah blah blah”, yeah I started this NEW CAREER to get away from all that.

Not sure it belongs here but sounds like shite to me.

Yep, I got that all the time too. My b/g twins look so different in appearance as well!
One of those daft things people would ask at random before engaging their 🧠!!

Op, not the point of the post & obviously I am not a doctor nor do I know your history - but I went on accutaine despite having a bout of deep depression and ongoing low mood beforehand.
I actually think my cystic acne contributed to my low mood and I was so overjoyed by the results of accutaine (roaccutaine at the time) that it improved my mental health no end - wish I'd gone on it sooner.

Dumb is a problematic word the way you have used it. It implies those who can't speak are stupid i.e dumb=stupid. You could have just said stupid because I am pretty sure you'd not like it if people used language like pizza face etc to describe those with accne.

Anyway some one said to me they envy me having a survivor as my grandmother because you get so much "kudos" in the Jewish world.

"You pass too well"

"How long have they had down syndrome?"

Yes I did try to delete the post after I wrote it knowing there would be some sanctimonious person like you come along. I've reflected and am deeply sorry for my post and wish I had not posted in the first place.

Woman at work who has 4 kids asked me how many I had. When I said one she said something a long the lines of “oh in my culture you wouldn’t really be considered a mother yet. It’s not the same as when you have multiple and truly get to experience the joy of it.” I was having fertility treatment at the time so really didn’t appreciate the comment. It was also said in front of coworker who had no children after failed fertility treatment and she was aware I was currently having it and we were both stunned by the comment.

She needs her massively thick hair to cover her massively thick head!

How can anyone thinks that’s okay to say?

My daughter has long thick gorgeous hair (as I once did, also peri menopausal) and my DH’s aunt commented on it asking me ‘who do you think she gets that from?’ whilst staring up at the the top of my head. 😡

Children with autism are gifted,they are so special and unique…

So are the children without it. I’d love to never see the bastard autism anywhere again.

FYI I love him, he’s awesome but it’s so hard sometimes 😢

In conversation with fellow junior colleague I commented that I wasnt sure if I wanted children and she said "but your life would be without meaning".

A few years later, still childless but not by choice at this point, I have accepted a lunch invitation from a guy who is trying to sell me stuff, in our line of work.
Him: do you have kids?
Me: no.
Him: Why not?
I cold stared him and said that's a v personal question. He stammered some bollocks and we moved on.
Safe to say he never saw any of my business.

My childminder had another kid who had the same name as my DS (imagine both called Alex). Both boys blond/ curly hair/ blue eyes. Someone who knew they both had the same name asked her: are they brothers? Like yes, if I had another one I will also call it Alex, for simplicity.