Asked to give up my seat on bus

You seem rather determined to be unpleasant over something very reasonable. Are you always so insufferable ?

Because if the bus stops suddenly or someone bangs into her bump it could cause considerable harm to the baby. Nausea can impact balance. In the early stages before the pregnancy is visible she is likely suffering with morning sickness....

This is the sort of thing where, if you can face it, I would offer to ask more broadly. "I'm afraid I'm quite off balance today so I can't offer you my seat, but why don't I ask if anyone else is able to offer you a seat instead?" I think it's probably easier to ask for a seat on someone else's behalf than your own.

I hate that argument.
Yes pregnancy is a choice for most people, but nobody chooses to have a difficult pregnancy.
Lots of the things that might leave you ending up needing a seat, like breaking a leg while horse riding, eating too much leading to obesity or smoking causing a stroke, crossing the road without looking resulting in injury, are a result of life choices but they are still genuine needs.

The average bus or train carriage has enough seats that all the genuinely pregnant, elderly, sick or disabled no matter from what cause, people can have one without us having to set them against each other.

I'm mid 30s. I'm also (if sat down I don't look it, but hey that's RA for you) disabled. So maybe don't judge the 'youngsters' sat down.

I didn't choose to be disabled. However women choose to be pregnant.

There’s no hierarchy on the priority seating. It’s simply an informal request to give up your seat if the need arises and you can stand. There is no need for anyone involved to evidence their need or share private medical information. The OP had good reason for refusing.

An older person being “a bit wobbly” is at much greater risk than young people being a bit wobbly. A fall that might just embarrass a young person can be fatal to someone with osteoporosis, for example. And many older women don’t even know they have it until they break a bone. My DGM took a tumble, broke her pelvis and died a couple of weeks later.

YABVU because you did the same as her, singling out certain people to ask directly because they "look" less able to stand. If you think that's acceptable then how can you whinge when someone does it to you?

I find that that that is met with everyone studiously looking down pretending they haven't heard and hoping that someone else will offer. Usually in a train carriage of 50 people it takes about 20 seconds of awkwardness for someone to reluctantly get up. No one is rushing to help the pregnant lady

I don't think either person is necessarily being unreasonable. Yes, pregnancy isn't a disability but it can be if you certain conditions that can come with it. And there should be other people who could offer a seat before a older person feeling unwell.

I, in my 40s, was once offered a seat 3 times on one day. I'm still not sure if I looked old, pregnant or sick.

Whys that then?
Older lady feeling wobbly and at risk of falling over Vs pregnant woman

Not seeing why pregnancy trumps here... she's not disabled, or ill, or elderly, or infirm, or recovering from a fall....

Some do on London transport.

Neither person was being unreasonable. Fine for the woman to politely ask, and equally fine for the OP to politely refuse. If there were young, fit gentlemen on the bus, they should have stood, and shouldn't have needed to be asked. But in any case, you don't have to give up a seat just because someone asks you.

I used to ask in a general "please can I have a seat" way so it wasnt pressuring one person who may not be able to stand. I think this is a better technique than picking an (older looking?) Lady

I once offered my seat to a lady who was not pregnant so badges are very useful for avoiding embarrassment!!

Yes they do and the mums I've met in my time who do so also tend to carry a very smug look also

Pregnancy is a choice. Getting older is not.

I'd have said something like 'really sorry but I've got a bad leg.' then at least her and another nosy folks overhearing would know you had a reason and weren't mobile enough. Rather just being a bit mean.

why do people keep saying the OP was in a priority seat !!
I am in my 60s and while I look younger and appear well I can’t stand for too long sometimes and if I have a seat I would be reluctant to give my seat up

No, you should have asked someone else, surely?. It's possible that two people on a train might need a seat. That doesn't mean one of them needs to stand.

There's no real reason most pregnant women shouldn't stand for a bit. Someone "wobbly" on a bus could come to harm, and actually, cause harm (or delay) to others on the bus.

Some pregnant women may need to sit, but being pregnant doesn't necessarily make it so. I have a friend who cycled to work every day of her pregnancy and another who was running regularly until the end. They could stand on a bus!

Not unreasonable at all. I'm in my forties and look completely fit and healthy but in reality I can't stand without fainting so I used to dread someone asking me to give up my seat when I used to regularly use public transport.

or someone who felt fine but thought bring8pregnant entitled her to a seat. we can all make up feelings of entitlement to serve the narrative we choose.

or someone who felt fine but thought bring8pregnant entitled her to a seat. we can all make up feelings of entitlement to serve the narrative we choose.