Asked to give up my seat on bus

Most people in their 60s are not frail and infirm. My Dad still runs several miles 3 x a week at 71 and he's not an outlier, just an ordinary fit and healthy man. He would immediately give up his seat for a pregnant lady on a bus. Retirement age isn't even until 68- how do you think all the people in their 60s doing physical jobs that require spending all day on their feet cope? You seem to be confusing 60s and 80s.

But how does sitting down stop the nausea and vomiting? If you vomit standing up or sitting down, the result would be the same.

a few days ago and she mentioned her age first. Sounds more like entitlement to me. Priority seats are for those who actually need them, not those who just feel a bit wobbly.

I think it is telling the OP mentions that she wasnt visibly pregnant, as if she thinks then need isnt as great.

Sorry, there are significant physiological differences between someone in their 30s and someone in the 60s. Think bones and muscle mass for starters. Think inner ear structures deteriorating leading to balance issues.

Madonna was nothing like she was on her 30s and 40s. She required assistance and didn't do any of the dancing she used to. And she is rich enough to have the kind of health care that keeps one going. Even she almost died a couple years back from a bacterial infection that turned to sepsis.

Madonna is/was a professional dancer and is absolutely an outlier physically (although going by her movement in some shows, she definitely would still need somebody to offer her a seat these days).

It's the same logic that dictates that because there are world class paralympian athletes who are phenomenally strong, fast and talented, everybody else with a disability should shut up and not expect any adaptations - the exceptional in a category are well known precisely because of their exceptionality. It's no more logical than saying that because Bolt could run 100m in 9.58s, the random bloke down the world would be able to do if he just ate fewer pies and went for a jog in the morning. No, he couldn't - and neither could anybody else.

60s is not even old. Madonna is 67 and just did a World Tour. Kier Starmer is 63 and running a country, after a fashion. There are no differences between an able bodied person in their 60s and 30s which make one more capable of standing than another.

But how does sitting down stop the nausea and vomiting? If you vomit standing up or sitting down, the result would be the same.

60s is not even old. Madonna is 67 and just did a World Tour. Kier Starmer is 63 and running a country, after a fashion. There are no differences between an able bodied person in their 60s and 30s which make one more capable of standing than another.

I agree and did this when pregnant. I have to say though that more than one one man was visibly cross to be asked and made a bit of a huffing fuss about giving me a seat, whereas I found women and older people more likely to offer when they saw my bump.

I disagree. A 60 year old with a very recent fall history and still "wobbly" which means she's unsteady or dizzy is at high risk for another fall while standing in a moving bus and at a higher risk of injury like a broken bone or two from another fall than a pregnant woman. She needs the seat more with the info provided.

There were also other people the pregnant woman could have asked.

Eh?
Early 60s?
I'm pregnant and would never dare ask someone in their 60s
That's so disrespectful
How's my needs more than theirs?
I was asked my a man possibly in his 70s to move and me being clearly very pregnant
I moved without question

I 💯 think that early pregnancy trumps wobbly on their feet. At 7 weeks I suffered from hyper emesis which meant I was nauseous and vomiting almost 24/7. I didn’t look pregnant and unless I told you, you wouldn’t know I was nauseous (until I was sick all over you).

im beyond fed up of pregnant women not getting the respect they deserve from society. it is one of the hardest things for the body to go through and yet still so many people, women included, don’t realise this.

I was standing on a fairly busy bus and witnessed a pregnant young woman( not visibly and no badge )ask a man who was 75ish for a priority seat, his equally elderly wife said but he’s not well!!! The man still got up and she still sat down . Another young man piped up with why didn’t just you ask me??? And went to give his non priority seat to elderly man . I think common sense should be that people in need of a seat try younger people first.

I think YABU in that you seem to think she's not a priority passenger or also didn't feel really vulnerable. If she asked you she probably felt like she desperately needed to sit down.

When I was pregnant and breastfeeding an infant, I was always shocked to find it was women in their 50s and 60s sitting in the priority seats on the train who never considered to offer (often groups so assume not all of them were disabled). Sometimes there were other seats available but I couldn't fit the buggy down. A couple of times I had to breastfeed my baby sitting on the floor when I was really struggling with the birth recovery. 60s isn't old so I wouldn't usually offer my seat to someone of that age (for fear of offence). My parents are in their 60s and fitter than me - they'd be mortified if someone asked them.

I think it's different in that you weren't in the priority seats, but it's possible the priority seats were taken. If I were you I would have just told her you'd had an accident and couldn't stand up and could she ask the passengers in the priority seats first.

Pregnant women can feel very unwell even if they're not physically showing that much. I got extremely nauseous on buses and know others who had various issues. Still got to get to work though. I actually ended up cycling while pregnant and braving the (London) roads to avoid potentially throwing up on a bus.

Pregnant women have different needs, just as people in their 60s do.

I’m 60 this year and I would get up for a pregnant woman because I’m able bodied and have good balance (I’m a Paddleboard instructor).

Some pregnant women have low blood pressure (I did), which makes them more likely to be wobbly.

Some 60yr olds might be infirm due to health issues; some pregnant women might be as strong as cart horses.

a few days ago and she mentioned her age first. Sounds more like entitlement to me. Priority seats are for those who actually need them, not those who just feel a bit wobbly.

I think it is telling the OP mentions that she wasnt visibly pregnant, as if she thinks then need isnt as great.

I think YABU in that you seem to think she's not a priority passenger or also didn't feel really vulnerable. If she asked you she probably felt like she desperately needed to sit down.

When I was pregnant and breastfeeding an infant, I was always shocked to find it was women in their 50s and 60s sitting in the priority seats on the train who never considered to offer (often groups so assume not all of them were disabled). Sometimes there were other seats available but I couldn't fit the buggy down. A couple of times I had to breastfeed my baby sitting on the floor when I was really struggling with the birth recovery. 60s isn't old so I wouldn't usually offer my seat to someone of that age (for fear of offence). My parents are in their 60s and fitter than me - they'd be mortified if someone asked them.

I think it's different in that you weren't in the priority seats, but it's possible the priority seats were taken. If I were you I would have just told her you'd had an accident and couldn't stand up and could she ask the passengers in the priority seats first.

Pregnant women can feel very unwell even if they're not physically showing that much. I got extremely nauseous on buses and know others who had various issues. Still got to get to work though. I actually ended up cycling while pregnant and braving the (London) roads to avoid potentially throwing up on a bus.

I 💯 think that early pregnancy trumps wobbly on their feet. At 7 weeks I suffered from hyper emesis which meant I was nauseous and vomiting almost 24/7. I didn’t look pregnant and unless I told you, you wouldn’t know I was nauseous (until I was sick all over you).

im beyond fed up of pregnant women not getting the respect they deserve from society. it is one of the hardest things for the body to go through and yet still so many people, women included, don’t realise this.

I think that I said no I am in my early 60s, and could she ask one of the younger more able bodied passengers. Something along those lines. Definitely mentioned my age. Didn't say anything about my feeling a bit wobbly - I didn't want a conversation!

i'll tell you what culture: the one that a woman who has had a fall, was wobbly and is in her 60s is the evil old bat for not giving up a seat when several other younger people could have.

The ageist society that we live in.

Don’t feel guilty! She asked you because she was too intimidated to ask the younger people. Good for you that you refused. She should have started with the younger ones.