Asked to give up my seat on bus

Just wow. Such a shitty attitude.

I've genuinely never even heard of them. How strange. I'm sure they get abused too, as it seems was the case in this scenario.

I agree with not standing if you were injured yourself. Seated, like many others I look fine. I'm not fine. I've got severe degeneration of both hips, one knee, 3 vertebrae, and moderate degeneration in both sacroiliac joints. I'm in substantial pain, it's obvious when I walk. I got on the bus one morning, saw no vacant seats (seats mostly filled with school kids) and apologised to driver saying I'll need to catch the next bus as I need a seat. He was lovely and turned around and made a kid move so I could sit. I normally ask kids to get their bags off the seat so I can sit but don't ask them to move if they are sitting. A long time ago children would have stood without being asked but that's no longer taught and as a result when people in need need a seat, even as adults, they won't offer.

Lots of women in London wear them. People don't tend to offer as if the women is not actually pregnant merely a bit chunky they can get a bit annoyed. We've all been stung with that one - it's not easy to tell with winter coats etc.

Entitled people who think that pregnancy makes them special.

Why should OP help her out? She should have asked someone else herself. Being pregnant is not a disability. She sounds like a CF to me.

YANBU at all. I am almost 60, and I would give up my seat on a bus to anyone I thought needed it - if I was able to. If I was struggling to stand/a bit nauseous/dizzy/feeling a bit rough/had a cold/was recovering from something/had any kind of pain after a fall etc, then I would say 'sorry no I need the seat. Ask someone else.' Bit odd that she asked you. You must have been 20 to 25 years older than her if she was pregnant. Strange that she didn't ask someone younger. (Who looked fit and healthy.) Maybe she thought you would be more of a soft touch...

After the operation on my feet (when I was in my mid-fifties) I was on the bus from Edinburgh to Fife and I finished up giving up my seat to an elderly chap with a stick. I could have done with keeping the seat, but the priority bench seat along the side was taken up by a young mother having a picnic with her children. (Food spread out in tupperware boxes. I wish I were making this up.)

The mother looked around and smiled at everyone, I recall. Possibly her children had invisible disabilities, but they could certainly have budged up to give the old chap a space. If the mother didn't want her him sitting next to the children, if they'd removed the picnic and sat closer he could have sat on the other side of the mother.

When another elderly person with a walking stick got on at the next stop it was another older person who moved for them. The mother and her children didn't budge until we reached the stop for the Ferrytoll Park 'n' Ride.

Quite a few women in London. The scheme’s been going for 20 years; this isn’t a new thing.

That's insane, who asks an elderly man to stand up? Well done to the young man who called it up and gave up his seat.

Wtf wears a pregnancy badge?

Definitely this. Early 60s is not elderly! Sorry about your fall though OP but you could have helped her out by asking someone else at least.

She should have asked someone younger.

YANBU. I think she was cheeky to ask.

She felt she needed the seat - fair enough.

It's the mental process and arguments used that makes her unreasonable.
"I'm afraid I'm not safe to stand today" is ok. "I'm early sixties and she didn't really look that much pregnant " combined with a lecture about who she should ask, is entitled.

Can you see the difference?

If someone goes to the trouble to ask someone who they think looks reasonable, and they decline, I can only imagine how awful she would have felt to be told no. She may have been in pain, feeling sick.

I disagree. I was diagnosed with an incurable illness at 19. I look perfectly fine on the outside but inside I am a hot mess and disabled. OP clearly is offended the woman asked a woman in her 60s instead of the able young ones. That is ageist as well to just assume they are healthy and able because they are young.

It's fine to not give up her seat, her choice. But implying someone else should because they look healthy is just as absurd and wrong. That is where the unreasonable bit comes in.

You could only tell she was pregnant because of her badge. You weren't sitting in a priority seat. And there were younger folk that she could have asked. She walked past all the people sitting in the priority seats.

I would have refused as well.

I'm 62. Over the last couple of years I've noticed a marked deterioration in my balance. Standing on a bus would be very difficult.

You did the right thing. Don't give it another thought.

It’s a TFL thing. Baby on Board.

DDs are using tubes daily and often see young men looking down at their phones totally unaware of the frail or pregnant who may have a greater need of a seat. They always offer their seats and the young men don’t bat an eyelid.

Don't agree.. Just said we're feeling a bit unstable and explained..politely.. Pregnancy badge?

I don't live in London but have been on the tube, not for a year or so though. Not been on a bus in ages.

Neither of you were.

Not as unusual as you think. I've several patients in their 70s and 80s running. Meanwhile my husband in his 40s is struggling to walk. Age is a number. Health is a lottery

Yes, some people in their 60s have health problems or are unfit. Some people in their 30s have health problems or are unfit. Hence why I specified "able-bodied". I know no 60 year olds who want to be treated like frail little old ladies or men, but apparently, lots of them on Mumsnet who think they count as "elderly" and need a seat more than a pregnant woman just by virtue of their age.