Birthday/Christmas cards on display at home - are they free for anyone to read?

This is an ongoing debate in my house, DH will happily read cards can’t see the problem. His mother was the same would just walk in and read anything laying around even letters and bank statements given the chance. Yes I should have moved them but I came from a family who would never read anything so I just didn’t think.

So you think you should put cards in your bedroom? That's just plain weird. People put them in their living room and they don't expect nosy people to pick them up and read them

I would never look either. It's the outside of the card that's for display, not the inside. It's a personal note to someone. DH will always put something very lovely and personal in my cards. I like to display the card, but what's inside it is for me.

I would look at my mum & dads, but nowhere else.

I think you shouldn’t put cards with private messages up in ‘public’ rooms. I sometimes like to see who else has sent cards to family members, or whatever.

OP, as I was reading your post it was going through my mind that you should write one to yourself with a very intimate/rude/shocking message in it, leave it out and watch their face as they read it, so it made me laugh to read you'd already thought of doing that yourself. I often get cards from friends with long messages in them, it's my home and I'll put my cards on display if I want but I wouldn't expect visitors to pick them up and read them, like I wouldn't expect them to pick up my opened mail and read it, even if I happened to have left it out. Likewise, I wouldn't go in other people's homes and pick up their cards and read them. I might admire the pictures on the front but I wouldn't actually pick the cards up and read what's written inside.

Yes I often do this however now you mention it, it is a bit weird that we think this is normal you don't just pick up someones post an read it 🤣

I'd think it really odd and rude if a visitor picked up cards in my house and read the insides. They're not "on public display" they're on my windowsill for me to enjoy. Some people are extremely nosy though!

No visitors shouldn’t read what has been written to you in cards. Look at the pictures and if you want to know who sent one ask. The messages are not their business.

I think its rude to pick up other people's cards and read them.

It would never cross my mind to pick up someone else's card and read inside it. That is, to me, incredibly rude and nosy. Just why would you?

Rude and nosey, they were addressed to you not her! Cheeky sod.

I don't think most people display cards like they consider their home a gallery for visitors, surely you put them up because you enjoy looking at them yourself. Or just want them there, in your own house.
Id say it's like someone taking books off your shelf and going through them, or picking a picture down and reading the back.
If personal items are out in the living space if a private house you politely ignore them, you don't scrutinise them like they are there for your entertainment!

I honestly would dream of picking up and reading a card in someone else’s house.

God, how rude!

You might want to buy some birthday cards of your own and write your messages like...

"Thank you so much for your Conclave Vote, Leo (Pope)"

"Merci pour ton aide recénte, bisous. Manu"

"Great ideas, thanks, we must get together again soon, Elon"

"I do wish you had accepted the honour this year. Maybe next year? Love Keir, xxx

...and then intermingle them with your other cards.

(N.B. Works for Christmas cards too!)

I wouldn't read anyone else's cards and don't expect people to read mine. I always put racy messages inside dh's cards ( as my mil found out the first year we were together when she picked up and read his card! ).

The entire purpose of displaying it is to display the exterior. The interior is for the recipient. When something is displayed the implication is always that you don’t go and pick it up.

It’s for display only. That means grubby hands should be kept off!

So it seems like one poster would go through everyone's cards but most other people wouldn't.
I'd look at my mum's cards but if I was in a friend's house, I'd just admire the fronts. I wouldn't mind if someone picked up and read my cards but I'd be a bit wary about what else they might do...

Oh dear, I was trying to bring a wee bit of levity, but it clearly missed the mark. I apologise.

You are of course allowed to hold any opinion you like and express it as you choose, as are we all.

You do appear to be disproportionately angry about this very mild little thread though, hence my concern, but I’ll take myself off as I have clearly made things worse. 😟

@Arlanymor to me the word ' display' implies that something is positioned so that it can be seen.
In the case of a card the front of it can be displayed. It's not possible to simultaneously have the interior on display
Unless it's an exhibit somewhere and a copy made of the interior and displayed next to m the face of the card.
You were despairing of people not understanding the word display but your understanding seems lacking.

I think it’s absurd. I’ve responded because I’ve been quoted.

Sorry that you don’t feel I am allowed to express an opinion in the way I wish to.

Maybe you can go and have a cup of passive aggressive tea too?

No. The cards are on display in my home for me to enjoy. Like fuck am I going to gather them all up and put them away just because visitors are coming round. It doesn't matter whether the insides have anything interesting in them to read or not, it's still rude. Maybe it's instinctive just because it's what you do when buying a card in a shop: look at the outside and then look inside for the printed greeting but definitely not ok in someone else's house.

I wouldn't dream of opening someone's cards to read the messages. And I'd find it pretty intrusive and nosy if a visitor did that in my home.

Wasn't there a thread recently about someone who was "outraged" by a visitor reading cards on display?

Perhaps some of these card picker-uppers haven’t read anything good in a while. Shall we list them some book reccs?