Birthday/Christmas cards on display at home - are they free for anyone to read?

Every day really is a school day on Mumsnet. Until five minutes ago, I had no idea that anybody would think it rude to pick up a card that was on display and look inside it.

I wonder if this is helping the trend of killing off sending cards.

If I cannot display a card from a friend on my own mantle because a snoopy snooper might come reading it, the card itself serves no purpose more than a letter rather than being something pretty with a note inside.

The card becomes the envelope of a letter to be tucked away.

Seems a waste of time picking it and paying for it, for it to sit hidden from even my own view because roaming eyes and fingers can’t leave alone.

I spend more time awake downstairs than I do my bedroom, I’d rather have my cards where I can actually enjoy them, than sleep with them.

I don't think the analogy others have used of going through someone's post or rifling through a stack of papers is a fair one because those things aren't intentionally displayed for others to view

it’s a very fair analogy. Similar to other post, the greeting card wasn’t addressed to the nosy visitor, it wasn’t intended for the nosy visitor, it was intended for one recipient, addressed to them and they’ve chosen to put it up in their home for them to look at for a few days. That’s not an invitation to gawk at their personal mail.

Its like reading through someone's wall.calender. its not on the wall.as a piece of public art
Duh.

If I saw a beautiful notebook on a table I wouldnt pick it up and leaf through it

Cards standing partly open on their end and clearly on display in a "public" area of the home are OK to read. And perfectly reasonable to do since greeting cards often have the majority of their pre-printed message inside.

I wouldn't take a closed card off a pin/ribbon board to read the inside or go into someone's bedroom/study, and if I didn't want the inside of a card I received read by others that's where I'd put it. If you want to use the front of cards as art then consider those display options.

I don't think the analogy others have used of going through someone's post or rifling through a stack of papers is a fair one because those things aren't intentionally displayed for others to view.

@ArlanymorI display my birthday cards in my own home for me to see not for other people’s Benefit. I didn’t realise my house was a public gallery! I don’t mind people looking but if it’s a long note inside I will think you’re a bloody nosey bugger!

I put up cards that I have received, in my home, for my pleasure. Not for visitors to my home. That’s how I run my home, for my benefit.

I agree with this. I keep my particularly nice cards out for a little while longer after my birthday for instance because glancing at them cheers ME up in my own home - they’re not for the benefit of any guests I have visiting.

I was brought up bad? I can spell weird.

I think it's really rude to look inside someone's else's birthday card. The front of the card is on display and they can look at that but not open it to read the message.

Bit much to accuse people of being wierd just because they happen to disagree with you on this.

I think it’s fine to look at the exterior of a card but would no more look at the inside message than I would open a private letter.

We’ve just been brought up with different rules that’s all. I think quite a few people would think it impolite as a visitor to go along the mantel or windowsill reading messages not intended for you though.

I would not put my hospital appointments on the fridge for all to see.
Dear cosyblankets your next smear is on 20th January
No thank you that's private so I'll put it away

Yeah - the poster you were responding to said ‘I don’t display cards, so it wouldn’t affect me, but never in a million years would I pick up a card in someone else’s house. It’s really bad manners. It’s the same as reading a post card that was propped up on a mantelpiece or eavesdropping’ - and you responded ‘not the same thing at all.’

Was it just the eavesdropping that you deemed ‘not the same thing at all’?

Well, as others have said, you may well have postcards on your fridge or hospital or GP letters so by your twisted logic it's fine for anyone in your house to read them?

and that's completely irrelevant on you being rude by reading other people's cards.

It would not bother me in the slightest if anyone read my cards

You've asked them have you? If so why? I guess because your friends and family are as rude as you are.

Everyone who sends cards to my home is very happy for anyone to read them. Because we’re normal.

I don’t think I’ve ever done it myself but yes, I’d think it’s the same as looking at a picture, the way you might lean in to squint at the detail. I don’t understand why you’d have them up if it bothers you for people to read them!

If you manage to read the inside of cards just by looking at them with your super power, fair play to you

if you have to put your hands on them and open them, you are being very rude 😂

Is that what I said?

Why do you think reading a birthday or Christmas card is different from reading a postcard?

Do you also read people’s wall calendar entries, or letters they’ve stuck to the fridge (perhaps medical appointments or bills)? If they’ve left an opened letter out on the coffee table, do you pick it up and read it?

I’m just interested in where you draw the line.

it's not a show-home, it's their private house. Is it ok with you if people display the cards for themselves, and really don't expect you to open them to read what can't be seen unless you rudely take them and open them?

Do you also grab the photos that are on display to check what has been written at the back?

I wouldn’t even think to look at others’ cards…it just wouldn’t occur to me. That said I wouldn’t be bothered if someone read mine.

What I find really bizzarre is the fact some people are suggesting that by ‘displaying’ them you’re basically inviting it. What is the point of cards, other than to display them? It’s not like you get them, read them and then chuck them!