TW - termination

I hope OP left the thread long ago and doesn't return to this cat fight …

She could factor in getting her nails done if she wants. Its got naff all to do with anyone else.

Shes asking for lived experiences and help with her decision not knob heads questioning her whys

I am done now anyway. This is not helping the OP. Who I hope to God isnt still reading the dross on this thread.

In your opinion. Doesn’t mean you are right. None of us have any right to dictate what another person does with their body.

The op is asking for opinions..

Made up moral rules such as please don't factor in holidays when making a decision? It's not moral rules it's common sense because i would bet a tenner the regret would put a bit of a dampener on trips tbh.

Obviously one of them needs to get sterilised going forward too.

It really is. You don’t get to decide what other women do.

No we shouldn't. But we shouldn't be guilt tripping her with made up moral rules either.

🤣

'My love'?

You seem to be missing the bit where the op has asked for opinions?
Should we all just parrot yes I agree, hmm?

OP I had an unplanned third pregnancy. My marriage was in a shite place. It wasn’t the right timing at all.
message me if you want to.

I was 10 weeks and went to an abortion clinic at my husbands suggestion - I felt so tired and sick I couldn’t think straight. The offered me a surgical abortion on the other side of the country (requiring a hotel stay). I cried the whole appointment but then booked with another abortion clinic who had services available for over 10 weeks in my area. I booked the surgery but I was in a horrendous place (it was 10 days away) I couldn’t sleep I hated myself I prayed to my baby and I talked to my baby. It was bloody awful.

I got some counselling from a charity. I realised I just couldn’t personally do it. It would haunt me more than the difficulties faced from keeping the baby (possible as a single parent). I cancelled the surgery, my husband accepted the baby and now loves the to pieces and says he’s so glad we didn’t abort.

I’m one of 3. I remember my Dad once saying you can give a lot to one, less to 2, and a lot less to 3. Mum had a termination after me because they literally couldn’t afford 4 children. This was back in the early 1980s.

We were a normal middle class family, no benefits, Dad worked hard to provide.

It’s sad when having another child literally comes down to finances but like others have said, it’s not just holidays but childcare, cost of feeding and clothing an additional child and the logistics of is there actually space in the home for another child or would 2 children have to share a bedroom.

Huge hugs OP. I know it’s not an easy decision and will be one that will live with you forever. We had a termination because of logistical reasons - I’m the higher earner and it would have meant I couldn’t have carried on with my career as it is. We are also older (would have been a geriatric pregnancy) plus I had a traumatic c-section with my last pregnancy so it would have been potentially risky to both me and baby. There’s a child in the family who is the same age as mine would have been as a constant reminder of where they would be in their development.

But for us, it was the right decision, and whilst I’ll always be a little sad and wonder what if, I don’t regret it. It has to be what’s right for you.

Shame. Because it is.

I could be pregnant right now with my reason being 'I dont want a baby' and guess what? I would thankfully be allowed an abortion 😊

It really isn't.

Significant mental, physical, wellbeing, traumatic issues are reasons. Not wanting 'it' is not.

I'm not defensive at all my love.

If someone doesnt want a baby, that is enough of a reason for abortion.

Dont like it? Tough. Not your body not your choice.

My friend's husband has no relationship with his older siblings for just this reason - they never forgave him for the change in circumstances they saw as his fault despite logic. It is an extreme and awful situation, but sibling relationships are not automatically wonderful.

OP you have an awful lot of emotional replies on both sides here. Only you can know the nuances of your family and project how you all might react. It is a horrible place to be, and I hope you find the choice that feels right to you.

That’s just your opinion though, it doesn’t mean you are right.

You are talking complete nonsense and trying to guilt trip the OP. FWIW my mother had a termination in addition to having me and my sibling and I have never felt 'grief' for 'my lost sibling' (or whatever) or resentment towards my mum about it - I'm happy she was able to make the choice that was right for her.

OP, in terms of where your family is at (eg the ages of your existing children) and what you've said about your financial situation and job security etc, I would have a termination if I wad in your shoes. But obviously it has to be your decision either way.

It doesn't help no. Women must have a very good reason to terminate. You seem very defensive?

Not wanting a baby is a good enough reason.

Erm nope. HTH

Really?!
You absolutely should have a very good reason be it mentai or physical health issues.

You can't police threads as long as people post within tgs.
You should not try to bully people to get off a thread. Just hide it if it upsets you.

You dont even need a reason for an abortion. That's the thing.

Dont want a baby? Have an abortion.

And @KatMansfield6 too please.this is not a post about morals.Op any reason that is valid to you is a reason to terminate or keep. X please mind yourself and your family.

To be fair you must be able to see that your standalone example probably wasn't the best used