To think it was my curry?!

YANBU and I wouldn’t have them back.

Some people just don't like being told 'no'. He was insanely rude, making that comment about you not sharing food after you'd cooked for him and hosted him for 5 days. Like, where did he think all those previous meals had come from?! He is either totally clueless/ignorant (doesn't know what it takes to cook and host because he's never had to do it), thought he was being funny, or is just an outright nasty person.

I disagree.
the OP handled the situation very well. She didn’t make a hige thing out of it but kept her curry and ate.
that was mature, adult, behaviour.

There is a question to ask about the friends and whether or not to have them coming back. Seeing it’s her dh friends, I think it’s on'y fair to leave him handle the situation and step back from it.

Id also say that itd be interesting to see what her dh take is on the situation. Both on the way the friend commented on wanting to help himself from that curry and the fact they never proposed to pay for the take away.
The fact the OP started this thread Wonderimg if a normal, adult, reaction was unreasonable makes me wonder if he just doesn’t see the issue tbh.

If I had cooked for others for five days I would be dying for a bit of takeaway curry just to have somebody else - even the curry house- feed me for a change.

I would have no problem with that either, sometimes it is easier just to do stuff myself than split up tasks

But there is no way I would be taking criticism if I had done all that

Nobody should moan out loud about food they are given in someone else's house

This.

Bunch of absolute Cheeky Fuckers. I’d have actually gone apeshit at that comment bc I’d be so livid at their entitlement at that point.

They’ve let you do all purchasing/preparing/clearing up of food plus hostessing for 5 days and haven’t even offered to treat you to a takeaway or meal?

I’d have gone full Travis Bickle 😂

That’s a totally normal thing to do in a marriage ((even though I’d argue he needs to learn to feed himself -what if you’re away in your own, you’re ill or, in old age, you die before him)

Its very different when it comes to hosting HIS friends bed they take you for granted. You’re allowed to step back and refuse to host them again. In which case,it would leave your dh doing the cooking. And it’s ok, even if he is a crap cook.

I think, as you were hosting, OP, you could have cooked yourself an entirely separate meal and eaten it yourself. It was your prerogative, as host.

What a greedy fuck.
If have blown my flipping gasket. Sad to say that the curry would've ended up on his head. 🤣

I'd have lost my appetite!

An actual martyr in the wild!

As a guest I would never have said that to the host in the first place.

And the answer is YANBU

But not even because you’ve hosted them.
But because they basically all helped themselves first. Had first d’ânon the leftovers and STILL wanted some of your choice/curry.
It could have been anything else in the leftovers. You didn’t have to share it with them when their plate was already full. Theyd have balked if you had asked them to share whatvwas in their plate right? Like ‘ofc let’s share. Here is some if my curry from my plate. I’ll take some of the beef from your plate’
No one would think it’s ok for you to help yourself from their plate. It’s also not ok for them to help themselves from yours either.

The point isn't that you cooked and cleaned it's that you were the only one who cooked and cleaned. Your DH, nor his guests did anything except allow you to wait on them for the entire duration of their stay.

As I said above I very much doubt if you ever stay at theres this will be reciprocated.

The 'friend' expecting some of your curry is just another example of how much they took the piss during your stay.

You may not, but your DH's friend get to eat and drink to their heart's content without contributing, and without your DH lifting a finger. They see the good little wifie scurrying about after them, mothering them and cleaning up their mess. No wonder the friend thought he was entitled.

Oh … that’s excellent.
There his friends. He can deal with the food next time. And if he struggles, they eat crap or whatever, well….. so be it?

Going out of your way fur ither people is great.
They’ve shown they have no manners and took you and your work for granted.
You don’t need to put yourself out there for them again. Or at least not until they’ve shown they’ve realised how shit their behaviour was.

Everyone already ate their own curry. She can finish her own whenever she likes.

Also it was your curry and that's the end of it.

If he's in the kitchen and you're somewhere else relaxing, then he's not a hindrance, he's just cooking.

They sound like awful guests and like they're taking their lead from your husband.

I think if everybody bought one main curry and you didn’t finish yours then it definitely was your curry, however I also think it was a bit rude to take it out and eat it in front of your guests without offering any up to anyone else. I think in this situation you should have either saved the curry for after they’d gone or offered it as part of the leftovers. Plating up for yourself a different meal to your guests isn’t really the done thing when hosting, even if there was only really enough for one.