To think we can’t take the children out of school just to spend Christmas with DHs family

No no no, this can’t be true. Everyone who grew up in countries where term time absences are permitted must ALL be deviants who can’t function in society!

I grew up abroad without this odd 100% attendance thing and I can quite confirm that missing week there and there dis not make us selfosh individuals and did not impact on us being part of the group.
I think this 100% attendance is absolutely ridicolous thing tbh.

The point I was trying to make is about holes in learning and not being part of the group; it's not really about pissing me off. Kids should be invested in the group..We're living in an increasingly atomised society. Isn't that the problem, and the reason so many young people appear to have developed mental health problems....because there is now this sense that school is something to be avoided, or something you dip in and out of..... something not to be respected, or invested in. You can go and visit your relatives when you're 18 and you go off backpacking round the world. In the meanwhile, stay in the classroom and prove you can sustain being part of a group for more than 5 minutes. All this bobbing in and out......it's like going to watch a play and leaving during the interval and saying " oh well, i got the gist of it, i don' t need to watch the second half " . It's crass. You just don't do it.

I work in a school and it’s rare that teachers are annoyed about kids being off. When it does happen, it’s mostly concern , rather than actual annoyance and it’s related to actual poor attendance rather than a week’s holiday once a year.

I used to be a teacher. It's annoying when this happens. I know all the arguments, but it's still symptomatic of the individualised, self above all else society we are becoming. No. Stay in the bloody school with your classmates, show some self discipline and learn whatever is going on in real time alongside everybody else.

The grandparents' death could indeed be accelerated if they have the bloody grandkids popping up on their doorstep pestering them and dusturbing the peace every festive season..Give the poor things a break.

What a bizarre take on a once a year important occasion. family is the most important group to be part of too and these ones live in a different country so they are persevering that ‘group’ at a meaningful time

The grandparents' death could indeed be accelerated if they have the bloody grandkids popping up on their doorstep pestering them and dusturbing the peace every festive season..Give the poor things a break.

The point I was trying to make is about holes in learning and not being part of the group; it's not really about pissing me off. Kids should be invested in the group..We're living in an increasingly atomised society. Isn't that the problem, and the reason so many young people appear to have developed mental health problems....because there is now this sense that school is something to be avoided, or something you dip in and out of..... something not to be respected, or invested in. You can go and visit your relatives when you're 18 and you go off backpacking round the world. In the meanwhile, stay in the classroom and prove you can sustain being part of a group for more than 5 minutes. All this bobbing in and out......it's like going to watch a play and leaving during the interval and saying " oh well, i got the gist of it, i don' t need to watch the second half " . It's crass. You just don't do it.

My kids are fully part of their peer group, are able to sustain being part of the group ‘for more than 5 mins’, are excelling academically, have loads of friends, are on multiple sports teams and love school. Going to visit their grandparents (who could be dead by the time they’re 18!) for an important cultural celebration every year while missing 2-3 days of school hasn’t affected that in the slightest. They are rarely ill so attendance is still usually above 98% 🤷🏻‍♀️, never below 95%.
’Bobbing in and out’ is absolute hyperbole, and is why people don’t take posts like yours seriously. They’re in school the rest of the year.

The point I was trying to make is about holes in learning and not being part of the group; it's not really about pissing me off. Kids should be invested in the group..We're living in an increasingly atomised society. Isn't that the problem, and the reason so many young people appear to have developed mental health problems....because there is now this sense that school is something to be avoided, or something you dip in and out of..... something not to be respected, or invested in. You can go and visit your relatives when you're 18 and you go off backpacking round the world. In the meanwhile, stay in the classroom and prove you can sustain being part of a group for more than 5 minutes. All this bobbing in and out......it's like going to watch a play and leaving during the interval and saying " oh well, i got the gist of it, i don' t need to watch the second half " . It's crass. You just don't do it.

The point I was trying to make is about holes in learning and not being part of the group; it's not really about pissing me off. Kids should be invested in the group..We're living in an increasingly atomised society. Isn't that the problem, and the reason so many young people appear to have developed mental health problems....because there is now this sense that school is something to be avoided, or something you dip in and out of..... something not to be respected, or invested in. You can go and visit your relatives when you're 18 and you go off backpacking round the world. In the meanwhile, stay in the classroom and prove you can sustain being part of a group for more than 5 minutes. All this bobbing in and out......it's like going to watch a play and leaving during the interval and saying " oh well, i got the gist of it, i don' t need to watch the second half " . It's crass. You just don't do it.

TB entirely honest, for many of us giving our children the opportunity to spend time with their families is more important to us, in the grand scheme of things, than whether we mildly piss off a teacher or not.

Thankfully the Head at my children’s school is fully supportive of family time and observing cultural and religious celebrations. Every year I put our absence request in for our trip to Spain to spend Reyes with family, and every year she replies with ‘have a wonderful time, family time is very important’.

I used to be a teacher. It's annoying when this happens. I know all the arguments, but it's still symptomatic of the individualised, self above all else society we are becoming. No. Stay in the bloody school with your classmates, show some self discipline and learn whatever is going on in real time alongside everybody else.