To find it laughable that people call it “self-care” to ignore others?

55 replies

PoliteEnoughNotToGhost · 03/01/2026 21:19

I keep seeing people act like ghosting, avoiding messages or pulling away from loved ones is some kind of empowered boundary. But since when did basic decency or communication become optional in the name of “self-care”?

Isn’t it possible to look after yourself without treating others like they’re disposable?
AIBU to think that a lot of this is just emotional laziness dressed up in self-help language?

OP posts:

UncannyFanny · 03/01/2026 21:23

When you are being hounded by someone who just doesn’t take no for an answer and won’t leave you alone because they don’t have the mental capacity to understand they are driving you insane then yes, it is self care to stop answering their calls.

Travelfairy · 03/01/2026 21:22

Completely agree. I have a friend like this, will be half way through planning to meet for eg over WhatsApp. She'll suddenly go quiet. Then msg days later saying sorry she got overwhelmed or had to prioritise herself and her MH. Like what about my MH?? Being strung along and then ghosted!!!

TheBigDee690 · 03/01/2026 21:22

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FranklyAnd · 03/01/2026 21:22

Not necessarily. Given that a freakishly high number of Mners appear to have friends they don't actually like, and to see their social lives as some kind of round of dreary obligation and dutiful 'checking-in' messages, it may be a sign of the awakening of some kind of minimal emotional IQ.

YourZippyHare · 03/01/2026 21:21

Are you my mother in law? Your son isn't speaking to you because you're rude and he just can't be bothered to keep managing you after trying to speak to you several times.

Seriously OP, who's not speaking to you? Why do you think that is?

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