To be jealous of teacher friend?

So go work in a private school then? You have agency over your life

I have to say that Scotland seems a lot better! Teaching in secondary in England seems horrible.

You say you never liked the idea of private education.

Did you cheer on the government when it decided to kneecap the independent sector by adding VAT to the fees for their charitable activity?

I find this slightly odd.
At our local private school (75% are boarders) they work until 6pm Mon-Fri plus 9am-2pm Sat so all teaching staff are also working.
Yes, holidays are longer but this is made up during term time.

It is a nicer environment though.

I have the utmost respect for teachers, because I wouldn't last an hour.
If you can make changes, OP, do. Your health is most important.

It's a tough one. A lot of the time, shit parenting is to blame. But the govt also needs to sort out workload and SEND provision, so I do understand how frustrating it must be for you.

Before you make the leap though, how much do you value the "making a real difference to disadvantaged or less affluent kids" element of your job? Because you won't get that in the independent sector. No judgement if it's not a factor for you, but it is why a lot of people go into teaching so that's why I ask.

Aren't all pupils leaving private schools in droves fue to the VAT? Well according to previous numerous MN threads they were, with teachers losing their jobs. Or was that made up.

I agree though schools need more support

Perhaps you could get a job teaching in one of the very strict new state academy schools?

No, you are not being unreasonable, (although I don’t really like the use of the word “jealous”)!
I recently retired early after 27 yrs at the same company. In hindsight I wish I’d moved to something easier and better paid, far earlier on, rather than staying there out of a misplaced sense of loyalty.
Do whatever you can to make your own life easier and your situation more comfortable, rather than sticking with a job that is getting you down, purely on a moral basis.

@Notheretoday its a wasted energy being jealous .
Can you not just start applying for these types of job for yourself .
If you don’t want to stay where you are then you need to be proactive in making changes .

okay...I just think comparison is the thief of joy - if you are ready for a change go for it. But I would check terms and conditions carefully. Are there any positive in your job?

Parental expectations are very high at independent schools - parents expect to get what they think they’re paying for. They’re paying, as they see it, £40,000 a year for Timothy to get into Cambridge, and if he doesn’t, that’s your fault.

I don’t blame you for feeling a bit jealous, her deal sounds amazing. A mate of mine works in a private school and isn’t experiencing anything like the perks of your friends, so like with anything it all varies I guess. She does say the behaviour is better, there are smaller classes, the general vibe is nicer and the parents are more engaged, but they’re also much more pushy as well and the pay isn’t as good as it was in a state school. Her biggest gripe I think is that it’s ultimately a business and so she is constantly being put upon to ‘advertise’ it, so to speak.

Also if it is a boarding school I'd be surprised that she doesnt have longer hours?? Presumably the pupils need to be looked after, entertained..taught classes in the Sat mornings?

You friend has a choice, as do you. I have a friend who teaches in an Indy and I believe there are other high demands...not to mention parental expectations..

Please don't be envious of your friend it will poison the friendship. Acknowledge that she has made a different choice to you. and if you want to you could do the same. Will the grass be greener? We all have friends who seem to have easier lives than us, or more money/time etc. We after to accept that we have made different choices, or change ourselves..We often only see the 'gold' parts of their job not the trade offs. Envy is toxic.

*AIBU to be jealous, or should I be glad to educate those who don't have the benefit of wealth?(

It’s both / and not either/ or.

However, have paid your dues OP, and it’s time now for you to have a turn at living. Do not continue like this. Though not all state schools etc etc

OP, she’s not going to tell you the negatives is she. It’s likely that she no longer has the TPS as many private schools have their own pension system. She’s not going to tell you if the parents are more demanding etc. take what she says with a pinch of salt.

if you want to leave then leave. But don’t be jealous of someone who will only state the positives. I teach secondary in a disadvantaged area. Yes it’s tough and yes behaviour is an issue but it’s an issue everywhere including private despite what people will say. Only you can make that choice

I really feel for you. I work as supply in primary. More work than I know what to do with because so many teachers off sick/leaving or recruitment issues. I think the unions have a lot to answer for here. Twenty years ago, what teachers are expected to do now would have resulted in mass industrial action!

I would honestly run into the arms of the independents, if I were you. You’ve given enough.

We can't blame for you for being fed up and stressed with some kids behaviour and some parents today.
The rest us up to.you.