To be jealous of teacher friend?

Private schools can be mixed sex.

Many private schools take refugees (eg. Our school has about 6 Ukrainian refugees in each year, and some Palestinian refugees - the ones I know of).

Many private schools offer significant bursaries to poorer applicants

Many private schools cater for many SEND kids.

I had a look at the private sector and the "school day" is often 8-5 even at Prep School age.

I think perhaps the main problem may be your current school. You need to find one where the kids have a good attitude to learning. I taught in a school where the kids mostly respected the teachers and did want to learn. I then moved to one where the kids were supposed to have good behaviour and they just didn't have that desire to learn.

She's painting a rose-tinted version of her job. I'm a private school teacher. The pay is less and the expectations are higher. The flip side is that you have more holidays but on the other hand, are somehow expected to teach the entire curriculum in a shorter space of time and for each child to excel.
Behaviour isn't an issue, it has to be said, but learning difficulties are rife and there's no funding for auxiliary staff.
It's not the dream she's making it sound, I promise.

@CatkinToadflax Including the op who cheered about vat. In our private school I felt teachers were on side with private schools. They appreciated the decent dc there and most dc were great too. The idea parental money makes dc horrible is a bizarre concept.

My neighbour is a teacher at a private school - last time we spoke she was incredibly pissed off - had decided to stop marking work and was looking for a way out - she says the salary difference is no longer significant.

I hope that the teachers who taught/teach my children don’t have preconceived ideas about them. I find it bewildering that so many people think only extremely privileged children are educated privately.

Agreed. Don't move to private OP. We want teachers who support and value the students, not ones who undermine them and teach a bitter, biased view of the world. Find a different state school to move to.

@sfd146That is a big incentive for people who want private education for dc, but the op thinks it’s elitist and doesn’t agree with it. I assume morals would get in the way of taking advantage of reduced fees!

I had a friend who worked at a private school, She got reduced fees for her own child, so stuck with it. She didn’t particularly like it, but it was less stressful than public education. She’s moved on the special education now, and is much happier.

I wouldn’t go to the private sector if I were you. I think you would find it difficult to be in an environment which goes against your ethical concerns. I have worked in a private school and it’s very different.

I would agree your friend has on an excellent job and would certainly be better than what you are struggling with at the moment. I would say though not all private education facilities are the same and some will have longer hours, plus similar issues with behaviour etc as you have now. All you can do is look around see what is available and then decide to go for an interview or not

@EnidSpyton I remember reading Ofsted didn’t like GCSE teaching over 3 years. I’m assuming that’s not the case any more. I agree it’s boring and very narrow.

@Elektra1Im in awe of what primary school teachers do. However all the ones I know have had more time with their dc than other parents get and certainly save on childcare in the holidays! The pension is still better than many others, so it’s jam tomorrow and working past 60 seems unusual too. Plus part time working is readily available. Plenty of schools are great places to work and are well run.

Private schools don’t all offer huge advantages to staff over state schools. I’ve certainly seen poor teaching in them that’s not been improved by CPD or any monitoring. Parents can also be very demanding. Paying customers alters the dynamic. As a private school, would I want to employ someone who didn’t support our whole business model and reason for existence? Not sure I would.

What a spiteful post.

Children don't get to choose where their parents send them to school.

Private schools do not offer 'spoon fed' education. Precisely the opposite, in fact.

State schools - particularly academy chains - are exam factories these days, focused on rote-learning and teaching by powerpoint. I have colleagues working in academy chains where Head Office makes the schemes of work and lesson-by-lesson powerpoint slides for each subject and these get sent out to schools in the chains with strict instructions for the teachers not to deviate from what has been mandated from on high. Many schools now have a three year GCSE course (Y9 - Y11) with students being taught and re-taught the same content over those three years, limiting the knowledge they are given access to, to ensure they pass their exams and the school can maintain its position in the league tables. Children are not being taught to think, create, collaborate - they're being taught to pass exams. Is it any wonder that many parents want an alternative to this shit show?

State schools' failures are not the fault of private schools. Pretending they are is a convenient way to dodge dealing with the real issues at play.

Parents sending their children to private schools still pay their taxes towards state education, and don't use the services - so they're paying twice already. If only the government were filtering that excess money towards improving state school education, but they're not. And blaming 'the privileged' and their 'mediocre' children (what a nasty thing to say) for successive governments' failures to invest properly in young people is a very easy way for society to dodge responsibility for a lack of interest in what really goes on in our schools, and a lack of collective action to do anything about it. The teachers' unions have been campaigning and protesting for years about all of these issues - academy chains, the growing popularity of draconian behavioural management systems, ever decreasing budgets, crumbling school buildings - but when we do, and when we go on strike, the public just tear teachers down and declare them to be moaning shysters who are perpetually on holiday, and who need to shut up or get out into the 'real world' - as if a school isn't part of the real world - meaning that nothing changes and so more parents feel forced to put their hands in their pockets to find an alternative.

I’ve worked in a fabulous state school and an appalling private school, so it’s swings and roundabouts.

But honestly, perhaps stop being so judgmental about private education. The fact that we are lucky enough to live at a point in history when the state provides all children with access to free education doesn’t mean that what’s on offer locally suits your child. If you can scrape the money together to find somewhere that does, then it’s natural to want to do that. I’d rather parents do whatever is within their means to help their children thrive.

We don’t insist on everyone eating state-determined food and living in state owned housing. we don’t say all children must only do extracurricular activities provided by the state. We all know that mandating such things would be bad for society. It’s the same with education. We do well as a country when people spend disposable income here and not overseas. It’s time to stop demonising the provision of high quality education in the private sector.

Hi OP. The advice to get some guidance from a lifestyle coach/counsellor was interesting and may lead to a ‘positive reframing’ of your current situation, to inform future decisions. Sometimes we take onboard the struggles of our colleagues, when actually we could choose not to - as a person in a caring profession, I know this will be alien to you. Also when we are overwhelmed we can focus on the negative rather than the positive. My career in SEN has evolved year on year and I have loved the flexibility and variety - you can’t teach the same thing twice without adaptations and that’s where the joy lies. Please take time to focus on YOUR strengths, qualities and goals and remember you are doing an incredible job. You will take these to any new role. I have moved schools and it’s challenging starting again, but the rewards are worth it. I am not dreading tomorrow but have been in SEN schools where poor leadership was can’t even describe how it made me and my colleagues feel x

@StellaAmy wow what a spiteful post. I personally know about a dozen who have left my school due to the charge and over the coming years there'll be more who wont continue who would have, leaving friends and familiar environments. I know kids who are not "mediocre", whatever that means, but have needs unmet in state and who can thrive in a private setting but you'd rather cut off that opportunity or make it even harder to attain? Until you can show me one, specific state sector improvement as a direct result of this policy, that outweighs those harms, and isn't just a vague ideological rant, I'll continue to oppose it.

You presume much. In any case, I'm all for the VAT charge and it hasn't put off many. If mediocre youngsters have better opportunities by means of extensive confidence and network building and handheld, spoon-fed education their privileged families rightly pay vat for this commodity. It's petty cash for many consumers of private education.

Retired teacher here. I worked in several different schools- rough inner city comps, good comps in leafy suburbs, girls grammar and finished my career as HoD in a prestigious independent school. The conditions and resources in the private school were so superior to any I had experienced before. Beautiful grounds, swimming pool, free lunches, small classes, plenty of free periods, longer holidays , better pay …I could go on. I was made to feel valued and respected. My advice would be to look for positions in the independent sector, but make sure it is a member of HMC, is selective and has a first class reputation. Some of the smaller, less prestigious institutions as others have pointed out will not offer the same conditions.

My mum was a teacher in state primary schools her entire life. It is bloody hard work for little reward. That said, she has a very solid defined benefit pension in retirement, the likes of which private sector employees could only dream of.

If you’d like the better lifestyle of a private school teacher, you could apply for a job in one?

While I completely agree with your point that most behavioural issues start at home, and there is a lot of awful parenting contributing to very challenging behavioural issues in schools, which leads to children not being taught even the most basic manners, with little understanding that sometimes the school class or group dynamic is more important than one individual in a school context, with parents completing failing to see why their “special” kid isn’t an exception to every rule, there is also a terrible problem with under-funding in the state sector which can’t just be ignored!

Lack of basic man power and having sufficient teachers to provide basic cover is one issue which causes large class sizes and a lot of stress for teachers and pupils alike.

And when a school is not selective, it has to deal with a whole range of issues, most of which can be handled if resources are adequate.

So in answer to your questions op, I don’t think you should feel guilty for going against your own principles because the state sector is so underfunded that it is requiring a ridiculous level of commitment from teachers who work in it, which eventually takes its toll and becomes unsustainable.

I have a friend and a cousin who are teachers in private selective schools. They both say they wouldn’t go back to teaching in a state school. They love teaching smaller class sizes and that most of the parents are really engaged with their children’s learning.

Don't be jealous, but look for a job in a school like your friend teaches at instead.

Do it! You have answered your own question here! I’m guessing you just need a few of us to tell you to do it! Apply and apply and apply again. Look at what ever extra you need to do, extra courses and anything that mars you above the “state school” average. Better yourself to work smarter not harder. If Covid taught us anything life is short do what’s best for you no regrets!

@NotheretodayHow can you possibly work with dc of parents who are paying the Vat, and possibly struggling to do do, and you cheered about this? No, you stay where you are! How awful to think that you want them to pay your wages whilst you don’t respect them!

Stop being green with envy & start looking to see if you can get on the ladder at a private school my friends wife works at one. & she loves it says it’s amazing do it if you don’t you’ll always be thinking what if

Not made up but exaggerated and amplified by the (largely right wing, non-dom owned) ) press. Many of said private schools were failing financially anyway.