Covid gave me brain damage. And I’m grateful. Not for the damage, but that despite me not being an obvious priority at the leading Covid hospital for my province (and one of leading Covid hospitals in Lombardia) the neurologist shoved me in a CAT scan, rather than just send me home cos my breathing was fine.
Without that scan I would have been shunted into the don’t know what’s wrong with her long covid group. And I’m pretty sure it would have been relegated to “all in her head” (which it was, just … as holes in my brain rather than health anxiety). Knowing me I would have retreated into the online world of long covid, and it would have made everything worse. I’m pretty susceptible to the nocebo effect.
DS had nothing better to do in lockdown, and we live in the rice fields and the Ticino Forest, so he rehabbed me relentlessly. He was determined to get me back on my feet and able to walk in a straight line.
While some people may be experiencing somatic illness, others will have underlying damage that hasn’t been diagnosed. In both cases work on physical recovery with support will probably be less unhelpful than being online rabbit holes, and may help with turning the corner. Somatic illness is just a physically “real” as holes in your brain, in terms of the right treatment being required.
I was ill for a month with a health anxious DH (who says it’s his greatest regret) who decided it was just me being anxious and there was nothing real wrong with me. Even if it had been somatic, I seriously needed help. And those four weeks were intensely lonely and isolating.
I consider myself one of the very, very lucky ones. I got the right test at (almost) the right time and had a supportive rehabber (albeit a bit David Goggins-like in his approach) in DS.
DS had no training, just the internet, time and an emotional investment in getting me back to myself as much as humanly possible. Now we are so long past the pandemic he wouldn’t have the time anymore. And I think I might have been written off by medics, friends & family alike.
I feel for you. Because I don’t think being the family member is much easier than being the one who is debilitated, one way or another. It’s a complicated area, requiring a lot of time and energy to resolve for the better.