Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

The long covid sink hole

270 replies

Cortrach · 02/01/2026 00:00

My brother has long covid. He tells me about it repeatedly, in great detail. About consultant appointments he has arranged for himself up and down the country, about how he is getting "support" from the "long covid community" which is as far as I can tell not a community at all but rather a collection of disparate individuals staring at the internet. He has been having long covid investigations for close to six years now. In all that time, no one has found any physical cause for his many varied symptoms as identified by him. Previous to him developing long covid he had atypical asthma for several years. Atypical asthma seems to me to be similar to long covid in that having it entailed him visiting lots of specialists who couldn't find anything wrong with him other than breathing in an anxious way.

I feel like I've lost him, and actually I need him because our parents are (genuinely) unwell with age related problems. He won't talk to me on the phone about it because he says it's too tiring for his long covid. I can't question the long covid because apparently he is surrounded by people who don't believe him and they are toxic.

I guess I just write him off, but I feel sad. He's my brother. And he's only 50! It's a waste of a life.

OP posts:
ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 04/01/2026 12:45

TalulahJP · 04/01/2026 12:14

thats what the homeopath who prescribed (nhs) told me to do when i was really unwell after one remedy.

i don’t see how less of somethimg could make it stronger?

That’s how homeopathy works. The more dilute the remedy the stronger it is.

Screenadelica · 04/01/2026 12:28

TalulahJP · 04/01/2026 12:14

thats what the homeopath who prescribed (nhs) told me to do when i was really unwell after one remedy.

i don’t see how less of somethimg could make it stronger?

The whole premise of homeopathy is that less of something is somehow stronger and will do more. You're right that it won't do anything though, at least not unless the patient believes it will so the homeopathy placebo effect is correspondingly stronger.

TalulahJP · 04/01/2026 12:14

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 14:50

I thought the more dilute the homeopathic remedy the more potent it was?

thats what the homeopath who prescribed (nhs) told me to do when i was really unwell after one remedy.

i don’t see how less of somethimg could make it stronger?

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 17:16

I’ve dm’d you.

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 17:03

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 16:56

I’ll contact her on Monday and dm you x

That would be great if you can, thankyou! 🙂

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 16:56

ProcrastinatorsAnonymous · 03/01/2026 16:46

I would be very grateful for her details too if she has been helpful

I’ll contact her on Monday and dm you x

ProcrastinatorsAnonymous · 03/01/2026 16:50

Cortrach · 02/01/2026 00:23

The communities just fuel it.

Omg thank you for saying that. This is what I'm feeling. The way he talks about it, it's like a cult. I find myself policing my language, but inevitably I get it wrong, because I'm not privy to what's acceptable to say this week, or this day, or whatever.

He was offered a test that would apparently have nailed his diagnosis, but he refused it because according to him he already knew the answer.

He's gone down several weird political rabbit holes as well - he was previously I would say conservative with a small c social policy wise (unlike me - dyed in the wool Trot) but now he's on a left wing purity spiral - he watches GB News in order to report on how right wing they are and gets wound up because they're right wing .

What is this test that would nail a diagnosis of Long Covid please? I thought it was a diagnosis made by excluding other possibilities, but if there is a specific test I'd really like to know! Thank you.

I have LC by the way. It is relatively mild compared to many cases, but has still utterly derailed my life. I used to be extremely fit and active and worked extremely hard alongside my parenting responsibilities. I'd say I'm operating at a third of my previous capacity. It's depressing.

There is no cure yet - doctors cannot do much. So it's hardly surprising people look online for things other people have found helpful.

ProcrastinatorsAnonymous · 03/01/2026 16:46

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 15:42

Greater Manchester

I would be very grateful for her details too if she has been helpful

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 16:40

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 16:07

I’m in S Yorks.

She does video calls.

Would you be able to give me her contact details please if you wouldn't mind? On here or over PM if that's better? Thanks!

ittakes2 · 03/01/2026 16:34

I don’t have long Covid but I read some of the info as I have an ill child with diagnosed POTs and we are looking at pans or mcas triggered by diagnosed mould allergy and this can overlap symptoms of long covid.
But I do know the nhs now had long Covid clinics.
You are mixing two things up - your brother not wanting a test to formally diagnose him as having long Covid so he can access appropriate help is a red flag about his mental health. You however taking a pop at long Covid victims because they are seemingly feeding his mental health issues is unfair

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 16:07

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 15:42

Greater Manchester

I’m in S Yorks.

She does video calls.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 16:06

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 15:45

Was it a private OT you saw or NHS?

She used to work at a Long Covid Hub, she’s private now.

Spookyspaghetti · 03/01/2026 16:04

I have a friend who worked for the NHS during Covid. Covid/long Covid caused permanent heart problems including needing her heart rhythm to be ‘reset’ under general. She can no longer risk drinking alcohol or caffeine and pregnancies have been more high risk.

You are unreasonable for treating your brother’s symptoms as some kind of conspiracy that is an inconvenience to you. Count yourself lucky it’s not you going through all that. Sorry to hear your parents are also sick though.

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 15:45

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 15:32

Yeah, whereabouts are you?

Was it a private OT you saw or NHS?

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 15:42

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 15:32

Yeah, whereabouts are you?

Greater Manchester

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 15:32

Yeah, whereabouts are you?

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 15:29

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 14:49

Yes, l have she was incredibly helpful. She was the one who put me in the road to recovery.

Was that in response to me about OT? If so, does the OT you saw offer video/phone appointments for people who are housebound do you know? Thanks! 🙂

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 15:26

pinkypoo8 · 03/01/2026 14:54

How many vaccines has your brother and this"community" had ?

People started getting long covid from the start of the pandemic, well before any covid vaccines.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 15:21

pinkypoo8 · 03/01/2026 14:54

How many vaccines has your brother and this"community" had ?

Why?

pinkypoo8 · 03/01/2026 14:54

How many vaccines has your brother and this"community" had ?

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 14:50

TalulahJP · 03/01/2026 14:15

im sorry to hear that.

i got told i would get worse before i got better and i just needed tiny treatments as my body couldn’t take anything more.

The therapist had epstein barr and me/cfs herself so she knew all about it. Not all therapists know how bad it is. Yours probably tried to help you as much as possible but did too much.

If i go to a new therapist i always ask them to do hardly anything per treatment as i can’t handle it if you do too much. i’d rather have small positive tweaks from three carefully placed relevant needles that provide some benefit each week than get my moneys worth so to speak from twenty needles treating all my issues at once as that would not help me in fact it would crash me.

I also diluted the doses of homeopathy medicines by making up the remedy in water to the number of ml it’s supposed to be, taking one teaspoon from the glass and putting into another empty glass and making it up to the ml it’s supposed to be with water again. (throw away the first glass). And only after i was sure it was safe after a few doses had been ok would i take the full dose.

i was so weak. it was ridiculous. im come so far but i remember im not right as soon as i reach my limit and i get symptoms again. it sucks. i can seem to escape it.

I thought the more dilute the homeopathic remedy the more potent it was?

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 14:49

Yes, l have she was incredibly helpful. She was the one who put me in the road to recovery.

NYE26 · 03/01/2026 14:31

Does anyone have any experiences, good or bad, with any private occupational therapy services for long covid? My mum has been looking at trying one as she hasn't had much help from the NHS.

Alpacajigsaw · 03/01/2026 14:30

It’s possible that the guy is very unwell but also doing bugger all to actually help himself, and also for the OP to find it draining and for sympathy to wane after all these years . Especially when she’s the one left to pick up all the slack. I feel very sorry to read about the awful experiences of some posters here but I feel a lot of people are probably projecting when the truth is the OP knows her brother and likely to have a better grasp of what’s going on with him than any of you.

TalulahJP · 03/01/2026 14:15

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 03/01/2026 09:28

Acupuncture crashed me twice. As did homeopathy.

im sorry to hear that.

i got told i would get worse before i got better and i just needed tiny treatments as my body couldn’t take anything more.

The therapist had epstein barr and me/cfs herself so she knew all about it. Not all therapists know how bad it is. Yours probably tried to help you as much as possible but did too much.

If i go to a new therapist i always ask them to do hardly anything per treatment as i can’t handle it if you do too much. i’d rather have small positive tweaks from three carefully placed relevant needles that provide some benefit each week than get my moneys worth so to speak from twenty needles treating all my issues at once as that would not help me in fact it would crash me.

I also diluted the doses of homeopathy medicines by making up the remedy in water to the number of ml it’s supposed to be, taking one teaspoon from the glass and putting into another empty glass and making it up to the ml it’s supposed to be with water again. (throw away the first glass). And only after i was sure it was safe after a few doses had been ok would i take the full dose.

i was so weak. it was ridiculous. im come so far but i remember im not right as soon as i reach my limit and i get symptoms again. it sucks. i can seem to escape it.

Swipe left for the next trending thread