Another short-term relationship ended...why? :(

Why were you crying a lot? I’ve never cried in an argument so it sounds like a very serious one? Blocking someone from leaving is not ok. Maybe you should buy so books on how to navigate relationships in a healthy way. What was the argument about? Do you think you’re hard work (I don’t know how to word that more gently, it’s a genuine question) in a relationship?

Also OP I would argue that you saying you were totally in love with him (“another one” implying this has been happening a lot with men you’re totally in love with) is further proof of you getting far too intense far too quickly.

With respect, don’t fall completely in love with someone straight away. You don’t even know him entirely yet. I think you are falling in love with the idea of having a partner and being loved, rather than the men themselves. You need to work on this part of yourself and getting to a stable place and then let love happen naturally, rather than throwing all your eggs in a basket within the first few months.

Well you've not given us much to go on here, but you do sound quite intense:
Small argument but you are crying and stopping him leaving.
Short relationship but in love and now bereft.

My guess would be that this specific incident was just the straw that broke the camels back. If someone was crying and stopping me leaving over a small argument I would also be thinking 'I can't be arsed with this'

I'm not surprised your relationships keep ending. Why were you emotional and crying a lot over a small argument and trying to block him from leaving the room? Maybe work on yourself and your emotional regulation before getting into another relationship.

If a grown adult wants to leave a situation, they should be allowed to, physically blocking their path is not on , I don't doubt for a second that he felt unsafe,maybe not physically but things could have escalated if he'd tried to get past and then he'd be open to all sorts of accusations.

yes, completely fair.

Blocking someone’s exit is always an instant dismissal.

you need to get a grip on your emotionality and learn to express negative emotions in a constructive manner.

I’m sorry you are upset but this is totally on you.

IMO though this is unsafe. He had no witnesses. He’s being egged on to tackle her physically or be unable to leave. He’s backed into a corner here. He can feel unsafe from her actions even if he 100% knew she wouldn’t get more physical than she was by blocking his path. And he didn’t know that. He didn’t know what she was going to do.

Feeling unsafe isn’t defined by purely by thinking your life is under threat. It means feeling NOT SAFE. Erratic behaviour like OP’s would put anyone on edge. It is unpredictable and highly emotional. If I thought someone might lie about me after I left I would describe that person as feeling unsafe to be around.

She physically blocked his path. His choice in that moment was to stay her captor or physically move her - with no idea what her reaction to this would be. I don’t know anyone who would describe this situation as feeling anything but unsafe in that moment.

If the OP is crying, hysterical at her boyfriend whilst blocking the exit, that would make most people feel uneasy and alarmed. It's not rational behaviour. It likely made the boyfriend wonder what else she might do or is capable of doing. The argument according to the OP was minor, so why the extreme reaction? Something no doubt the boyfriend asked himself too. It suggests someone who can be highly strung, prone to extreme reactions and can struggle to regulate their emotions. To be honest I'm not surprised he's ended the relationship. If the OP hadn't reacted extremely and her boyfriend could have left, as he wanted, then the OP would have calmed down and her boyfriend would have had the space he needed. If the boyfriend had physically moved the OP, then he could have left himself wide open to be accused of assault. OP, you need to look at this relationship and previous ones, objectively - have you behaved in a similar way before? Are there any reasons why these relationships haven't worked? Do you get too invested quickly? Do you become 'needy'? Do you find it hard to regulate your emotions?

Yes! It’s absolutely maddening to me to say that men suddenly aren’t allowed to use the word unsafe because they aren’t as threatened as us. Men experience physical violence from women. Not on the same scale as we experience from them - but it absolutely happens. Men are absolutely valid to feel unsafe with a woman blocking their path to stop them from leaving. Regardless of history, regardless of size difference between the two of them. OP describes herself as in a very heightened emotional state. He didn’t necessarily know what she was going to do. The situation by all accounts - including OP’s own description, which would be tilted in her favour - was abusive and frightening.

That PP is unhinged to say men can’t feel unsafe just because violence against women is worse. I do agree that the level of fear women experience from men is eternally greater and more profound, but that doesn’t mean the word unsafe is unfit or invalid.

My ex H used to witness his DM attack his DF after a drink. He had visible scratches down his face and all sorts over the many years. This man wouldn’t lift a finger to defend himself or restrain her because he was not and is not that man. He wouldn’t lay a finger on her for it to become in any way a two way street of abuse. All of the children in the home attest to this. He absolutely felt unsafe whenever she was drinking. How can anyone justify saying he can’t feel unsafe just because he has a penis? You can say because he technically could restrain her, but realistically if he tried she could have had him arrested.

We don't know what has happened beforehand in your former relationship. It may have been the excuse to end a relationship and there were other things unspoken.

Of course it can seem unfair for anyone who has had little or no success in relationships when you see some others who seem to have happy ones or even just have some to begin with.

This is a better way of putting what I was going to say. Without the full details or knowing what the argument was about, crying a lot over something small or seeming emotionally unstable is something lots of people don’t want to have to deal with. Especially mid thirties and beyond. Or it could be that the guy has his own issues and normal displays of emotion make him feel unsafe, but it doesn’t sound like this was particularly normal

I don't believe the man felt unsafe, but rather the only way to resolve the blocking of the door would be to get physical and he doesn't want to do that (and quite right too).

Best to get out of a relationship where the person is almost being egged on to get physical.

When I read the post I didn’t assume the chap meant he felt physically unsafe, I assumed he thought that as the OP wasn’t behaving in a rational manner because she was hysterical over a small argument and blocking his exit she may well accuse him of something if he had had to move her out of his way.
I wouldn’t be too comfortable with a person regardless of gender hysterically crying and blocking my exit either. Just because he could physically defend himself if necessary doesn’t mean he should feel comfortable with someone behaving in an irrational way, which I assume the OP was because she said she hasn’t behaved that way before.

If a woman lost control over what she herself says was a small argument to the point she was crying and shouting and physically blocking my wish to exit the situation I would be feel unsafe. She isn't going to physically hurt me but I don't want to be around someone that's not able to control themselves, it's unstable and it makes me very uncomfortable to be around someone unpredictable. I don't think his being male plays into it.
He could just be using it as an excuse too, but that doesn't change the fact that it's not an acceptable way to behave.
I'm not trying to upset the OP, it may not have been in her to control it, and it may not have been intentionally manipulative, but she does need to look at that behaviour regardless of him imo

I also don’t think that level of emotional distress is a one off and he probably saw a pattern emerging.

Must admit I lose my rag big time if someone is crying and getting stupid over a 'small argument' I don't cope with emotions like tears and guilt tripping.
My m was an expert with water works, she made me sang froid as a result towards people. The only ones I care about are kids, disabled the elderly and the vulnerable. Op has acted in a similar way to m in the past and she was given both verbal barrels by me as a result.

I have sons and I have learnt from their behaviour patterns that If he wanted a relationship with you, he’d be there, you would know with no uncertainty he wanted you and so would he but he’s told you clearly he doesn’t and he’s not there and he’s told you why.

I think when men make up their minds to be with someone or not their minds are usually pretty clear.
I’d hazard a guess he doesn’t want the drama and tears and when he tried to escape he probably felt trapped by your resistance to him leaving so ran for the hills.

I would end a short term relationship if a minor argument caused an emotional maelstrom, sorry. Too much drama, not worth it.

The second he lay a finger on her to try and leave she would have been able to say he instigated things getting physical between them.

I agree with him, the situation was unsafe. You say it’s a disagreement but you got such heightened emotional reactions you blocked his exit while weeping. You say you don’t have form for this but clearly hadn’t considered his side of things before he told you how it made him feel. You could very well have made partners feel this same way before.

With kindness it sounds like you need some therapy before you’ll be ready to have an emotionally mature connection. Work on yourself and your relationships will be easier.

It is abusive to block someone from
leaving when they have expressed the intention to do so.

Any drama like this so early into a relationship, would have me running too.

Yes, it's fair.

No one should he in a relationship they don't want to be in to keep another person happy.

Only you know how you behaved but if you were crying a lot and blocking his way from leaving, that would lead me to end a relationship too.

Either this was a crappy relationship and you just refused to see it or it was too much for him. So either work on your emotional resilience in the New Year or work on your own boundaries in a relationship.

A few months into dating, you shouldn't be having such horrible arguments. The relationship wasn't meant to be, move on.

Is it worth asking him if any other of your behaviours contributed to the break up? If there is a pattern of this happening, it might be worth asking for honest feedback to improve future relationships?

Of course it’s fair. A person can split up with who they want and do not need to justify it