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AIBU?

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AIBU to go out on NYE without husband

34 replies

Sallysushine · 31/12/2025 12:23

I have two children aged 7 and 9. No plans this evening other than a promised family games night which will probably end around 7pm (they need early nights as we were at friends until 10pm last night). Friends have invited me out to the pub later, AIBU to go around 8pm and leave hubby with the kids? For context he HATES NYE and everything about it. He wouldn't feel like he was missing out - he's usually asleep by 10 on the night!

OP posts:
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Vurrsome · 01/01/2026 00:29

Definitely not, my OH is the same and I’m out with three girlfriends right now celebrating NYE

Bushmillsbabe · 31/12/2025 22:28

Did you go out OP? If yes hope you had a great night.
I'm a homebody and DH is much more sociable. I would actually prefer he went out on NYE, as if not I feel a bit guilty if I don't stay up til midnight with him. If he goes out I get the kids to bed, snuggle up in my pj's and bed by 11 latest.

DappledThings · 31/12/2025 22:20

Why is anyone going to be judging you? I don't get it.

mumofoneAloneandwell · 31/12/2025 22:18

I personally think you should ltb xx

Usernamenotav · 31/12/2025 21:19

LavenderBlue19 · 31/12/2025 13:51

I don't understand why you think anyone would judge you for going out without your husband? Again, don't you ever go out without him?

Probably because it's NYE, I doubt she would feel that way any other night for going out without her husband.
I kind of get what she means but if her husband won't mind then I wouldn't worry what anyone else thinks.

VikaOlson · 31/12/2025 18:13

I'm doing exactly that, games night with the kids then DH is dropping me off to the pub 😂

Chinsupmeloves · 31/12/2025 18:12

Absolutely go!

BuildbyNumbere · 31/12/2025 17:58

Sallysushine · 31/12/2025 12:48

Thank you. Yes I think that's it, it's the judgement aspect.

Who’s going to judge you? How will people know you are married anyway.

BuildbyNumbere · 31/12/2025 17:56

Have you mentioned it to him? Go if he’s ok with it.

Pherian · 31/12/2025 17:15

Sallysushine · 31/12/2025 12:23

I have two children aged 7 and 9. No plans this evening other than a promised family games night which will probably end around 7pm (they need early nights as we were at friends until 10pm last night). Friends have invited me out to the pub later, AIBU to go around 8pm and leave hubby with the kids? For context he HATES NYE and everything about it. He wouldn't feel like he was missing out - he's usually asleep by 10 on the night!

My husband would be fine with it. We go out together and apart - it’s perfectly normal and healthy.

However, how does your husband feel about it ? You could ask him if he would mind you having a night out.

SereneCoralExpert · 31/12/2025 16:27

Sallysushine · 31/12/2025 12:48

Thank you. Yes I think that's it, it's the judgement aspect.

unless you start giving a lapdance to every male in sight (which sounds very unlikely) not sure what judgement you are talking about?

PinkyFlamingo · 31/12/2025 16:15

Not sure I get why you are worried people would judge you??

Fidgety31 · 31/12/2025 16:13

Judgement !! From who?! I doubt anyone would know you, judge you, or give a flying fook whether you are in the pub or
not!
Do you not have a life ? Or are you always at home ?!

gamerchick · 31/12/2025 16:10

Cherrytree86 · 31/12/2025 15:49

Just stay home , OP @Sallysushine

Why. So she can see in the new year alone? Sounds like fun.

Cherrytree86 · 31/12/2025 15:49

Just stay home , OP @Sallysushine

gamerchick · 31/12/2025 13:55

It's a no brainer for me. I'd just let him know and he's got the fort.

Or you'll be sitting twiddling your thumbs come 10pm and he's gone to bed, wishing you had gone out

LavenderBlue19 · 31/12/2025 13:51

I don't understand why you think anyone would judge you for going out without your husband? Again, don't you ever go out without him?

Eyeshadow · 31/12/2025 13:45

I don’t even know why this is a question - I nearly always go out with my friends on NYE.

If your DH is fine with it then go for it!!

BadgernTheGarden · 31/12/2025 13:28

Sallysushine · 31/12/2025 12:48

Thank you. Yes I think that's it, it's the judgement aspect.

Will the friends get you home safe? Will DH be worried and stay up waiting for you?

ArseSkinForAFriend · 31/12/2025 13:24

Sallysushine · 31/12/2025 12:48

Thank you. Yes I think that's it, it's the judgement aspect.

Oh well, you might as well stay in then and never go anywhere ever.

ABeerInTheSunshineMakesMeHappy · 31/12/2025 13:07

I would ask if he minded - he may be looking forward to sitting drinking champagne with you as the clock strikes 12 … chances are that’s not the case, but I think it’s polite to ask when it’s a special occasion evening, and also when it’s last minute.

MojoMoon · 31/12/2025 12:55

Whose judgement? Your husband? Your friends? Your mum? Random people in the pub?

If your husband is fine with you going, then clearly his judgement is that it is fine. If he is going to bed at 10pm, he doesn't really have any good reason for you not to go out for a bit assuming you aren't going to be so drunk as to be entirely incapable for the next whole next day.

Your friends have invited you so clearly they want you there.

Random people in the pub? Who cares.

Your mum? You are an adult and also she doesn't need to know anyway.

Sallysushine · 31/12/2025 12:48

MojoMoon · 31/12/2025 12:35

Are you worried other people will judge you while you are out?

If your husband is fine with it, then go, of course. It sounds like it's not his thing but that doesn't mean it can't be your thing.

You are married, not literally chained to him. You can go out without him so long as you are just dictating to him, rather than discussing it.

Talk to him.

Edited

Thank you. Yes I think that's it, it's the judgement aspect.

OP posts:
MojoMoon · 31/12/2025 12:35

Are you worried other people will judge you while you are out?

If your husband is fine with it, then go, of course. It sounds like it's not his thing but that doesn't mean it can't be your thing.

You are married, not literally chained to him. You can go out without him so long as you are just dictating to him, rather than discussing it.

Talk to him.

randomchap · 31/12/2025 12:32

Have a good time

Enjoy

It would be different if he'd made plans with you but he hasn't.

Just try not to wake the family when you stumble in at 4am

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