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Original poster

I am very upset that I haven't been asked to be my sister's bridesmaid.

137 replies

Lottie585 · 29/12/2025 16:14

Let me preface this with - I will absolutely get over it but ...

My little sister told me on Christmas Day that she has decided to ask her five friends to be her bridesmaids. She said that she is worried that I won't have lost my baby weight by the date of her wedding (I'm pregnant now and the baby will be 10 months old), plus I will have 3 kids to look after and she thinks I won't have the time to make her the certain of attention.

Most likely an excellent point because yes my kids are very important to me.

Why do I feel so bad about this? I've clearly romanticised this in my head. She was my bridesmaid. I would have loved to be hers. I'm also 13 weeks pregnant - so hormonal! But I'm sad 😂 am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Original poster
Lottie585 · 29/12/2025 16:21

Goditsmemargaret · 29/12/2025 16:17

Is she very shallow? I didn't want my sister to be my bridesmaid as she'd show up outrageously late and ruin my day. However I still didn't want to hurt her feelings so I opted for no bridesmaids. I regret it now honestly.

Your sisters reasons are pathetic.

She is the middle child and probably a bit of a stereotype. I wouldn't necessarily call her shallow but she has never been particularly bothered about hurting my feelings. She was an okay bridesmaid for me (I had 2) my sister and my sister in law but she did find it very annoying! To be honest I thought she thought weddings were annoying! But this is going to be a big wedding!

OP posts:
23Shadows · 29/12/2025 16:21

Dodged a bullet there I reckon.

PivotPivotmakingmargaritas · 29/12/2025 16:21

Did she SERIOUSLY say “ you might not have lost the baby weight”?!?!? Fark I think you’ve made a lucky escape and good luck to the chosen 5 jeepers what a cow

PhantomAfternoonTea · 29/12/2025 16:20

My sister didn't ask me, because she just assumed I wouldn't want to (social anxiety related). I was pretty sad about it too for a long time. But to be fair she was right, I could barely cope with her wedding as a regular guest, being a bridesmaid would have been hell.
I completely understand you being upset but if you normally have a close relationship, that's what matters, not one day.

Isayitasitis · 29/12/2025 16:19

Oh wow so not only was your weight mentioned, she needs the attention on her????

Where does this B get the audacity.

I think she's saved you a wealth of trouble. Be glad it's not you, the cheeky mare.

TeenToTwenties · 29/12/2025 16:19

I think with 3 children by then you won't have time to do all the things it sounds like she will expect of you.
(You or your Mum could suggest you do a reading perhaps?)
5 bridesmaids is a lot ...

PolarJadeite · 29/12/2025 16:18

I would be upset as well. Obviously she is under no obligation to make you a bridesmaid but to say she is worried you won't have lost the baby weight is just mean. You also don't have to be maid of honour (aka organise hen do etc) if youre busy with kids, plus hopefully there will be other people to help with your kids on the day? If they're invited

BendingSpoons · 29/12/2025 16:18

I think it's a bit mean of your sister. With 5 other bridesmaids she would have plenty of hands to help her out whilst you were with her kids. However traditionally bridesmaids were unmarried and it might turn out to be a blessing that you can just be a guest and not need to get involved in lots beforehand and on the day.

Vaxtable · 29/12/2025 16:18

Sounds like there’s a bridezilla on the way. Just be grateful it won’t include you

Goditsmemargaret · 29/12/2025 16:17

Is she very shallow? I didn't want my sister to be my bridesmaid as she'd show up outrageously late and ruin my day. However I still didn't want to hurt her feelings so I opted for no bridesmaids. I regret it now honestly.

Your sisters reasons are pathetic.

Bigtreeesss · 29/12/2025 16:16

Sounds like your sister is incredibly self centred and you’ll have a much nicer time not having to fawn around her on the wedding day

PennyLaneisinmyheartandmysoul · 29/12/2025 16:16

If she actually said those words that she ‘needs to be the centre of your attention’?

good escape!!

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