Horror at sons "special" christmas present?

Is she a post-grad at Bristol herself OP?

You mentioned that they met online and I wondered whether she was studying elsewhere.

I would like to think that a woman of her age, still studying and not yet established in a career and financially stable, would be talking to her GP about every option open to her 're this pregnancy.

He could have used protection. As a 20-year-old he should have engaged his brain. It takes two. I'm not sure why people think she has 'motives.'

Wow, completely harsh and uncalled for. Unplanned pregnancies do happen and totally unfair to blame OP's son.
They are mutually responsible.
Please don't compare to your family member who has seemingly behaved irresponsibility as a parent.
One of my neighbours became pregnant at 16 and they are still together over 40 years later.
No guarantees in life.
I hope the young couple get the support they need.
Sending strength to all concerned

Why unreasonable ?

🍎 🌴

^The girlfriend is quite a bit older than the OP son
26yo International Student she has either worked then travelled or this is a 2nd degree and travel
A lot more life experience
20yo men and 26 yo women are on different wavelengths
How many people on here would be happy if their 20yo daughter met a 26yo man , online , when they were students . That man from another country and culture .And to secure their place in the UK after their Visa runs out ....
Yeah you;d be thrilled [hmm . Not .^

This is a really weird take on it. I do not see OP talking about this at all..

HA @70isaLimitNotaTarget

Brexshit really did a number on many people.....

It's just a small island off the coast of Europe.

Ahhh #bekind. The last refuge of the unreasonable who’ve been called out 🙄

This. So much judgement of OP without even knowing the circumstances in which she had her DS. Her 20 year old student son is having a baby with a woman six years his senior, who he has only known six months, and who is herself an overseas student, due to leave for home shortly after the baby is born. He breaks the news to her in the most insensitive and performative way and then casually asks her over dinner if he and a woman OP has never met can move in with her and their child. It’s beyond me why OP is coming in for so much criticism and pressure to be happy and supportive of what is basically a deeply irresponsible act. Far from congratulating them, I would be very worried about this womans’ motives.

How is it not relevant?

It sounds like your son has tried to use a public unveiling of the pregnancy and request for accommodation to bounce you into having the three of them move into your home.

Horrible manipulative behaviour, has he always been this way?

Why wouldn’t you want them living with you!? I can’t imagine either of my boys being in that situation and I wouldn’t want to help. Plus you had him at 18, were your parents not just as concerned?

I suspect the girl will not return to Korea, think 1950s style parenting in the UK, she will be terrified of her parents' reaction. Korean parents only meet the boyfriend when they are ready to be married. I'd suggest shes looking to stay in the UK. She needs to tell her parents that they will need financial support from both sets. She will get a post-graduate visa, then need to leave, earn over 38k or be married and apply for a spousal visa. She is also unlikely to get any NHS support unless she has paid up front for it with her study visa

The girlfriend is quite a bit older than the OP son

26yo International Student she has either worked then travelled or this is a 2nd degree and travel
A lot more life experience
20yo men and 26 yo women are on different wavelengths

How many people on here would be happy if their 20yo daughter met a 26yo man , online , when they were students . That man from another country and culture .And to secure their place in the UK after their Visa runs out ....

Yeah you;d be thrilled . Not .

Yes if they move there.

I spent many years living in Asia and wouldn't want my child to be living or working in South Korea unless they're a plastic surgeon or a lawyer and have the dosh to set themself up in business.

It is a highly competitive, hierarchical society with too many graduates chasing few jobs, working hours are extremely long, and suicide rates are the highest in the developed world.

Having a child out of wedlock is frowned upon, as it is also a very conservative and misogynistic country. Do not be surprised if gf wants to get married and remain over here if her family proves unwilling to accept her choice of a foreign partner. Childcare over there is very expensive. Does DS speak Korean?

The Op may have been very young when she fell pregnant,and no doubt she loves her DS, but she knows better than anyone that being a parent so young isn't easy or for the best. Your DS isn't mature enough to be a parent if his first thought is that they'll move in with you rather than being independant adults.

i think I’d have to agree to let them move in- but only temporarily

Hollow laugh at temporary

Is he working and earning a wage? Is she?

They'll be around for ever until she goes back to her country and family to raise her child there'

Wow I wonder how the Korean grandparents will react. I bet they are not thrilled. It will be a massive headache when they inevitably split. I don't envy you OP, your son sounds very immature.

Squirrelchops1 · Today 18:12
What an amazing opportunity for your son to live in Asia. I sound sarcastic when I'm being absolutely genuine

Getting permanent residency in Korea isn’t easy. Op, can your son speak Korean?

He wrapped up the stick she peed on and had you open it in front of people? 😅 He does sound a bit dim to be honest. He’s got a couple of years on you when you had him though.

20,000 yrs ago?

She's a lot older than you were. And your son is older than you were, too. You're being hypocritical, honestly.

Will she be able to stay after her degree, won't her visa run out?
I don't think having a baby makes a difference to that.

This.