Daughter has bought her 7 year old a phone

I disagree actually. Maybe my situation is niche, but I suspect not. If your ex was constantly pulling a disappearing act with your young child and you didn’t know where they were, along with them not being allowed to be in contact, you might decide a smartphone with a tracker wasn’t end of the world. My DD was 8 when she got her phone and it was under strict screen time and parental controls. It wasn’t ideal but if you’ve never felt th fear of not knowing where your child is when the other parent can use this for coercion, maybe it’s fine for you to think differently but with less judgment.

fwiw I regret a lot of the decisions I’ve made as a parent and I do things differently and still regret them with my youngest but I care deeply for both my kids, have always tried to do the right thing and at end of day I still agree with my initial comment that granny is allowed to have an opinion on her grandchild but this isn’t her call

@ForUmberFinch the pp was talking about Scotland, is that where you’ve worked? School doesn’t offer laptops or devices where we are, but family at private school do get iPads, laptops provided but are not allowed to use personal smartphones in classes.

Would be interesting to hear back from the OP @Alisonjayne8 if their GD is allowed them at school?

This is bs. I work in education. None of the three local authorities I’ve worked in have issues individual devices.

our school canteen takes cash. I don’t issue homework online. Kids get printed copies. What you describe does NOT happen in every LA.

It doesn't matter how a device is connected to the Internet Family Link controls the device.

The family link relates to your own account, not the individual device, you are only blocking the apps and browser access, you aren’t stopping the individual device from working and it has an easy workaround if your child uses another WiFi network (those tech skills you think they're gaining come in handy at this point) or they can access an app you haven’t blocked, or use hidden chats feature if you allow them to have WhatsApp, then when your children turn 13 they can opt out of your family safety anyway 🤷‍♀️ but I’m sure you’re aware of all of that.
See, I am educated in this. I did that when my dc was in y6 before starting secondary school and the pressure requirement for a smartphone came from every angle. So now I understand it more than most- thanks also to a relative who works in cyber security- and I also know that for all the safety features you as the parent think you have in place, you can’t prevent your child seeing something on another child’s phone (in the same way you can’t be there to stop another child supplying them with illegal substances or alcohol, but if parents are supplying the phones then who can you blame?)

The OPs GC is 7yo, if all her friends have phones too, it’s not going to be too long before she sees something a 7yo shouldn’t see.

Yep. Thought it doesn't come as any surprise that someone who is clearly not that 'academically enabled' thinks it's fine to give their 7 year old a mobile.

Honestly, I despair.

Phones and Tablets can be locked down, Internet restricted, or completely disabled.

Just because you don't know how doesn't mean it's not possible for the average parents.

Yes there is...family link allows you to do all of this.

Again perhaps educate yourself before spouting utter BS

Agreed. Absurd comparison. They are not the same thing at all.

Usual SNP fuck up sounds about right.
I know kids in secondary in both North & South Lanarkshire neither have them

But Glasgow seem to issue in S1. I know Glasgows are tightly controlled, they can't down load things like Netflix and only the council ipads can connect to the school WiFi

Fife have had them for P6 and above for 5 years. The govt pledge is every child by end 2026.

Google tells me south Lanarkshire is pretty well on with the roll out but north Lanarkshire is lagging

looks like usual SNP fuck up

https://mol.im/a/13673407

Not in lanarkshire they haven't!

That's pretty horrific

You think the Scottish govt are going to listen?

not a chance

Yet, also in Scotland 💔 these parents: Parents taking action

Thank you - that's interesting that personal smartphones still play a part

Maybe an unintentional control group if things move in a different direction in other parts of the UK?

Not everywhere

scottish government is rolling out iPad / Chromebook for every child.

they’ve got as far as age 10 in most parts of the country and age 8 in some parts.

my kids have had government Chromebooks for 5/6 years now and are expecting to get upgraded to iPads very soon.

home work and time tables all issued by smart phones, school dinners and school buses paid for using phones.

I bought my DD one at 7 because pretty much every kid in my country gets one then, when they start school. I regret it now and did not get my son one when he started school, he has a watch phone instead which can't do anything except call set numbers and take pictures, and he will be stuck with that for a long time. More and more parents in my country are doing the same now

Is it actually capable of them? Or is it a type that could have them but his has parental controls.

I got my DS one at 8. Its a regular smart phone, not a special kids one or anything but I uninstalled everything and put parental controls so he can't install anything without my consent. He dose video calls with his dad or other family members throughout an app called 'just talk kids', so can only receve calls from a number I've approved, and that's it.

If you saw my 8yo with the phone you'd probably judge, but in reality, there's nothing to worry about and he's actually less exposed then kids with game stations or roblox.

Yes of course -both good and bad uses

Australia has banned social media, phones have a zillon other uses than social media.

Going on about horrible social media (they are,
I have never joined), but what can actually be done?
If the child wants access, sooner or later she'll get it, one way or the other.
Sure she's not the only one.

we have taught them that tech is there to assist their daily lives, and that’s exactly how our kids use it. No need to be scared of tech, as long as you use it correctly.

My dc, like me and DH all use tech in our daily lives, like most of the planet, we’re not scared of it, but the impact it has on childhood is scary. Your DC have been gaming on phones, that’s not tech skills, it’s gaming skills, in the same way opening up a banking app and pressing buttons to pay for car parking isn’t tech skills. Children- particularly secondary age, are not using phones for tech skills and you’re kidding yourself if you think they are. I went deep on all of this for DC starting secondary school and I know there is a huge, serious problem with kids on phones and how they actually use them.

I also have no desire to be one of those families I see where everyone is on a device, not talking to each other, so I hope that the OP is still able to enjoy quality time with her GC now the phone has joined the family.

DS school goes from.primary to secondary and the phone ban is for the whole school and I wholeheartedly support it.

This seems to be the future so Op's daughter is very much going against the flow and current thinking

See also Australia

My 7 yo has one of our old iPhones. It doesn’t have a SIM and he has to ask for permission before downloading any new apps so we keep tabs on everything he does, certainly no SM. He just uses it to play games or watch YouTube, similar to an iPad but we gave him one of our old phones when we upgraded rather than buy a new device.

Family controls exist, I’d imagine your DD will be savvy enough to know this and will set him up as a child so he won’t be able to access whatever he wants anyway.